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Are divorced women supposed to live alone?
- Thread starter seeking the truth
- Start date
Twilight Hue
Twilight, not bright nor dark, good nor bad.
Relieved?
Sand Dancer
Crazy Cat Lady
Women were not allowed to divorce a man, so I don't think men bore the brunt of it.
Altfish
Veteran Member
Why am I not surprised?
Adultery involves sex between a married woman and a man who is not her husband, so a married or divorced man can have all the sex with unmarried women he wants and still not be considered an adulterer.
Iymus
Active Member
Ideally man should not put away his wife "divorce" unless she committed fornication as cheating on him. With that being the case it does not seem wise for a man to marry such divorced woman. I suspect many single mothers are also under this umbrella as well.
With that being said it seems the intention for Divorces is Infidelity .
In a morale society I believe this benefits women and children the most. So asking your above question signifies perhaps we do not live in an ideal morale society.
Also Paul in his wisdom said it is better for a widow to remarry than commit fornication. But I am aware a Widow and Divorced woman is not the same.
Altfish
Veteran Member
I wonder which sex invented that law?
seeking the truth
Member
If so, what about the no sex before marriage law?
If you happen to be the daughter of a priest, it's a bummer, you get burned alive. If you are male, it is not a problem at all. If you are a female, you get called a whore. Otherwise, not a big problem unless you get married claiming to be a virgin. If you are a female who gets married and then gets divorced, then you are an adulteress if you have sex before your ex spouse dies.
I guess the solution would be to never get married if you are a woman. (Except for the daughters of the priests--they are born enslaved to the system.)
That says nothing about women divorcing husbands if you take that verse literally.
seeking the truth
Member
So we come back to the same basic issue, are christians to take Christ's teachings and commandments as he said them and follow/obey them or do you do your own thing?
shmogie
Well-Known Member
Christ did not say one must not marry a divorced woman. If her husband committed adultery, or seriously abuses her, she has the right to a divorce and there is no stigma attached to her remarrying. Adultery on the part of a wife are grounds for divorce for a man.
shmogie
Well-Known Member
Adultery is a sin whether you are a man or a woman. It does not say that a woman cannot get divorced if she is sinned against in the same way.
Most denominations, if not all interpret it this way
Galateasdream
Active Member
True.
I think Jesus/author likely couldn't conceive of women divorcing men.
Would that mean if someone was highly literalistic in their reading they would say that only men could divorce women?
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That is not literally there but there is a discussion about the customs of the time here: Divorce along with Biblical quotes.
That web page said that only men could divorce women but women could remarry. And that page has a lot of details about the customs of the time.
What I take from that discussion is that the Biblical provision was designed to make it harder for men to divorce women for trivial reasons like finding a much younger woman.
james bond
Well-Known Member
What I've discovered is unmarried people do not have to live alone for the rest of their lives. The divorced person has to repent. This does not mean they are sorry for what happened. They have to promise that it won't happen again. It means they have to change their mind about what happened, blaming the other, accepting responsibility, and change within. Then, they can partake of Jesus' teaching and how marriage is sacred between a man and a woman. It is what God joined together. It may mean they will have to give up who they are with now. It may mean they have to sacrifice what happened in the past. Change means one loses something as well as gain something.
halbhh
The wonder and awe of "all things".
You can sure get a variety of opinions on this from Christians!
I'm suggesting below a way to ask Christ (of course you can pray, that's a great way, and do that too!).
The rules for living are never a....simplistic thing, like the Pharisees tried to make things.
They got it all wrong (as we see in the accounts) -- Like their various detailed and intricate rules about what you could do on a Sabbath, in a simplistic way, forgetting/losing the real intent, purpose. (for the Sabbath, it seems the real intent is to rest and to focus on God)
Very often, when we are not sure about the exact way to go because of complicating factors (example: if the husband cheated extensively and repeatedly (sometimes even before marriage, which could prevent the "two become one" from even happening!), just 1 of dozens of possible commonplace situations)....
But, Christ gave us powerful aid to understand the real intent, the true aim, for all the Law (not just part of it!) --
Matthew 7:12 In everything, then, do to others as you would have them do to you. For this is the essence of the Law and the Prophets.
(and wonderfully, it means just what it says; He didn't have a slip up or make a mistake that day He said this to us)
So....that means that for those more unclear situations, where there has been abuse or cheating or other such things, and also for things we cannot even imagine too, you can ask yourself in your heart how apply this discerning rule, to tell you how to go.
Did he totally leave you in his heart (even before the marriage for so many, just invalidating it to begin with?)? I do not know. But you may. Or can find out.
He might have been angry and said hurtful things, but may have since truly come to a repentance -- the only way to know for some people might be to talk with him.
So, see, in a way, the real question is sorta like this: in your hearts, are you 2 still kinda really...well, married (in the heart)? Or not? Or was it never the case even? You have to be the one that figures this out. So, you have the rule above to help, and then you have searching your heart, and especially, the most, you have prayer. Then you can, with His aid, go the right way.
But for many, this is a key thing they need to apply, through faith:
Matthew 18:21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother who sins against me? Up to seven times?"
Matthew 18:22 Jesus answered, "I tell you, not just seven times, but seventy-seven times!
(and it's very helpful to read the rest of this passage, about how to forgive, and what to forgive)
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halbhh
The wonder and awe of "all things".
Maybe my post just above could help. People often hear some minority viewpoint and just take it as the text, where the person has tried to answer making the same mistakes the pharisees made, as if it was just simplistic, stickler rules. That's sorta one of the things we can learn on the first or 2nd time reading through a gospel: they got it wrong. It is not simplistic rules. Something radically else.
What i learned was that bible OT was a hateful and bigoted tome. And the fact muslim regard for divorce as far more flexible than christian can be verified... Here is a quick rundown
Divorce in Islam - Wikipedia
Subduction Zone
Veteran Member
Yes. And with cats.Lots and lots of cats.