Spirit of Light
Be who ever you want
This thread has been on my mind for some time, because a friend of mine was maybe a bit open in his questions toward me , He had heard some rumors about Ace or A-sexual persons and asked me maybe a bit blunt..." Are you A-sexual and have no interest in sex with woman "
That question took me with surprise because mostly everyone who know me in person know I am careful about speaking of this topic.
But I realized I had to answer him, and asked for some time to prepare an answer that was not just about me, but about Ace in a more general sense. And some of it, I would like to share in RF
And yes I did get a bit of help from our dear internet to give this answer
Some people don’t experience sexual attraction at all
Some asexual people don’t experience any sexual attraction. That doesn’t mean that they can’t experience other forms of attraction, though.
Aside from sexual attraction, you can also experience:
Others may only experience sexual attraction in certain circumstances
Some people might only experience sexual attraction in very limited circumstances.
For example, someone who is demisexual — which some say falls under the asexual umbrella — experiences sexual attraction only when they have a deep connection to a person.
In other words, they might only feel sexually attracted to people they have deep romantic relationships with.
They have a libido or sexual desire, but it’s void of sexual attraction
There’s a difference between libido, sexual desire, and sexual attraction.
Similarly, many asexual people still have a libido and might experience sexual desire. So, asexual people might still masturbate or have sex.
One thing’s for sure: It isn’t the same thing as celibacy or abstinence
Many people falsely think that asexuality is the same thing as celibacy or abstinence.
Abstinence is about deciding not to have sex. This is usually temporary.
For example, someone may decide to abstain from sex until they get married, or someone might decide to abstain from sex during a difficult period in their life.
Celibacy is about deciding to abstain from sex, and possibly marriage. This could be for religious, cultural, or personal reasons. It’s often a lifelong commitment.
Abstinence and celibacy are choices — asexuality isn’t.
What’s more, asexual people might not actually abstain from sex at all. As mentioned earlier, some asexual people do have sex.
Despite what you may have heard, it isn’t a medical concern
Many people think there is something “wrong” with asexual people.
The world seems to assume that everyone feels sexual attraction — so asexual people might worry that there’s something wrong with themselves, too.
Asexuality isn’t a medical concern. It’s not something that needs to be fixed.
It should go without saying, but being asexual isn’t the same thing as experiencing:
The information was collected from this website What Does It Mean to Be Asexual? 18 Things You Should Know (healthline.com)
For me @Conscious thoughts I have non or if any, very little sexual attraction to anyone (at this stage in my life) I have not been in a romantic relationship or any relationship for that matter after I realized that I had become an Ace. The thing is, I think I have been an ace all my life, but due to certain " expectations" from family and friends I tried for a long time to live as a normal Heterosexual man, but I did have some issues I could not explain when I was in relationships.
In my current lifestyle, I am most happy on my own But who knows what the future brings? maybe I do meet someone who I become attracted to in a non sexual way and she might see it the same way?
I know this thread might raise some questions, and I am open to answer to the best of my ability.
That question took me with surprise because mostly everyone who know me in person know I am careful about speaking of this topic.
But I realized I had to answer him, and asked for some time to prepare an answer that was not just about me, but about Ace in a more general sense. And some of it, I would like to share in RF
And yes I did get a bit of help from our dear internet to give this answer
Some people don’t experience sexual attraction at all
Some asexual people don’t experience any sexual attraction. That doesn’t mean that they can’t experience other forms of attraction, though.
Aside from sexual attraction, you can also experience:
- Romantic attraction: desiring a romantic relationship with someone
- Aesthetic attraction: being attracted to someone based on how they look
- Sensual or physical attraction: wanting to touch, hold, or cuddle someone
- Platonic attraction: wanting to be friends with someone
- Emotional attraction: wanting an emotional connection with someone
Others may only experience sexual attraction in certain circumstances
Some people might only experience sexual attraction in very limited circumstances.
For example, someone who is demisexual — which some say falls under the asexual umbrella — experiences sexual attraction only when they have a deep connection to a person.
In other words, they might only feel sexually attracted to people they have deep romantic relationships with.
They have a libido or sexual desire, but it’s void of sexual attraction
There’s a difference between libido, sexual desire, and sexual attraction.
- Libido. Also known as your sex drive, this is about wanting to have sex and experience sexual pleasure and sexual release. For some people, it’s a little like wanting to scratch an itch.
- Sexual desire. This is the desire to have sex, whether it’s for pleasure, a personal connection, conception, or something else.
- Sexual attraction. This involves finding someone sexually appealing and wanting to have sex with them.
Similarly, many asexual people still have a libido and might experience sexual desire. So, asexual people might still masturbate or have sex.
One thing’s for sure: It isn’t the same thing as celibacy or abstinence
Many people falsely think that asexuality is the same thing as celibacy or abstinence.
Abstinence is about deciding not to have sex. This is usually temporary.
For example, someone may decide to abstain from sex until they get married, or someone might decide to abstain from sex during a difficult period in their life.
Celibacy is about deciding to abstain from sex, and possibly marriage. This could be for religious, cultural, or personal reasons. It’s often a lifelong commitment.
Abstinence and celibacy are choices — asexuality isn’t.
What’s more, asexual people might not actually abstain from sex at all. As mentioned earlier, some asexual people do have sex.
Despite what you may have heard, it isn’t a medical concern
Many people think there is something “wrong” with asexual people.
The world seems to assume that everyone feels sexual attraction — so asexual people might worry that there’s something wrong with themselves, too.
Asexuality isn’t a medical concern. It’s not something that needs to be fixed.
It should go without saying, but being asexual isn’t the same thing as experiencing:
- fear of intimacy
- loss of libido
- sexual repression
- sexual aversion
- sexual dysfunction
The information was collected from this website What Does It Mean to Be Asexual? 18 Things You Should Know (healthline.com)
For me @Conscious thoughts I have non or if any, very little sexual attraction to anyone (at this stage in my life) I have not been in a romantic relationship or any relationship for that matter after I realized that I had become an Ace. The thing is, I think I have been an ace all my life, but due to certain " expectations" from family and friends I tried for a long time to live as a normal Heterosexual man, but I did have some issues I could not explain when I was in relationships.
In my current lifestyle, I am most happy on my own But who knows what the future brings? maybe I do meet someone who I become attracted to in a non sexual way and she might see it the same way?
I know this thread might raise some questions, and I am open to answer to the best of my ability.