Too Much Modesty?

[Watchmen]

During the last year or so that I was actively participating (about 2014), it seemed like a week couldn't go by without my daughter getting a lesson on modesty in YW or mutual. From my experience in YM, including as YM President and as a Scoutmaster, I can tell you the YM don't get weekly modesty lessons.

I believe modesty is a very personal thing that is based quite a bit on a person's own view of their body.

I also believe the Church cares more about how YW dress than what YM think.

It wasn't always like that. There's a picture of a BYU Homecoming Queen hanging in the halls of the university and she's wearing a sleeveless dress *gasp*!

Why do you think there's such an emphasis on modesty these days? My understanding is that sex and teenage pregnancy has actually been going down for some time in the US. Is there such a thing as too much modesty? Could the Church's emphasis actually create an unhealthy view of the female body?

 

[Watchmen]

No one wants to discuss???

 

[Watchmen]

I'm blown away that no one believes this a topic worthy of discussion. Maybe I need to move it out of the DIR forum.

 

[Confucian Mormon Buddhist]

What kind of modesty lesson would you want? One teaching them to not sexualize women, or one teaching men to behave more modestly themselves?

But yeah, there's definitely such a thing as too much modesty, like when you don't show your face around anybody but family, or when you don't show our ankle because that would drive men into a frenzy of lust... There's more at play here then just modesty, but I wonder how much that sort of nonsense impacts Muslim men's tendencies towards homosexuality and rape.

In general, I think repression tends to make people dysfunctional. It doesn't really prepare them for the world.

 

[Watchmen]

What kind of modesty lesson would you want? One teaching them to not sexualize women, or one teaching men to behave more modestly themselves?
.

Good question. I'd like occasional lessons for boys and girls about body image and personal strength. Your body is a temple so take care of it. Eat right. Exercise. And be confident in your body and know it is from God. Measuring hemlines and sleeves and saying "modest is hottest" does the opposite.

 

[Confucian Mormon Buddhist]

Good question. I'd like occasional lessons for boys and girls about body image and personal strength. Your body is a temple so take care of it. Eat right. Exercise. And be confident in your body and know it is from God. Measuring hemlines and sleeves and saying "modest is hottest" does the opposite.

That is an important lesson, but I wouldn't say that it's a lesson on modesty... seems more related to the Word of Wisdom, really (taking care of health).

 

[Watchmen]

That is an important lesson, but I wouldn't say that it's a lesson on modesty... seems more related to the Word of Wisdom, really (taking care of health).

I think having a solid body image is takin care of health.

 

[dianaiad]

I think that the emphasis on modesty is a 'push-back' against what is seen 'in the world,' so to speak. I remember that sleeveless dresses were just fine when I was in high school...but then when I was in high school ALL the girls had to wear dresses and/or skirts that reached the knees or below. The 'line' on modesty was pretty easy to see for everybody, Mormon or not.

Now, though, with all the emphasis on 'body image,' or whatever, and all the emphasis on looking good and being skinny/athletic/beautiful/sexy/ whatever, what is considered 'modest,' or appropriate, is all over the map. When I taught high school, the girls came to school in ripped jeans that showed skin that ordinarily wouldn't be seen anywhere but in the shower. Bra straps are a fashion statement. Underwear on the males is more visible than their jeans are. The whole point is to advertise sexual availability.

It doesn't surprise me a bit that modesty 'rules' for Mormon women would be more clearly spelled out, or even more strict, than they were fifty years ago. It is, I think, an attempt to keep our identity, and to make it easier for women to deal with such decisions. We are Mormons. We don't DRESS like that...is a perfectly acceptable position to take on the matter. At least, I think so. As well, if any woman can't be stylish, well dressed and gorgeous in an outfit that not only has sleeves, but doesn't show the crack between her neither cheeks, then she's got more problems than I can deal with.

Of course, I'm pushing 68 REALLY hard, and frankly, if I dressed like the millennials around us, a whole bunch of people would simply go blind.

 

[Truth_Faith13]

During the last year or so that I was actively participating (about 2014), it seemed like a week couldn't go by without my daughter getting a lesson on modesty in YW or mutual. From my experience in YM, including as YM President and as a Scoutmaster, I can tell you the YM don't get weekly modesty lessons.

I believe modesty is a very personal thing that is based quite a bit on a person's own view of their body.

I also believe the Church cares more about how YW dress than what YM think.

It wasn't always like that. There's a picture of a BYU Homecoming Queen hanging in the halls of the university and she's wearing a sleeveless dress *gasp*!

Why do you think there's such an emphasis on modesty these days? My understanding is that sex and teenage pregnancy has actually been going down for some time in the US. Is there such a thing as too much modesty? Could the Church's emphasis actually create an unhealthy view of the female body?

When I was a member and even now, I never had an issue with the "modesty". I actually found it quite refreshing. Mormonism aside, I guess most men tend to wear jeans and t-shirt with the exception of a few boys who think it's cool to wear their jeans lower than their boxers. Men tend not to put too much thought into their dress. Girls on the other hand do and you see a whole host of types of dress and about. Girls showing their tummy, wearing belts as skirts, clothes that are too right etc etc.

In terms of the change, I guess times change. The word of wisdom was never enforced, now it is. Modesty in JS time was the natural dress so didn't have to think about it. Nowadays...girls run around pretty much naked!

Even now though, I see members not following the "code". Endowed members who are clearly not wearing their garments and strap tops for example but happily posting the pics on social media.