The young ones chance

[tcprowling]

It must seem to teenagers or the younger generation that the "Oldies" are forever finding fault with them, so here YOUR chance, Let's give the "Young'uns" a go.... to the younger members give us a list of up to 5 things where you feel the older generation, be they parents, teachers or those in authority, are at fault, Even if it is only a " wish list"

 

[tcprowling]

This is like my kids were, They would walk around looking lost and I would say " What's Up?"
answer "Nothing!
me: well something thing's wrong?
Them:" I'm bored"
Well what do you want to do?
" I don't know!"
You have the chance to speak, take it, Heaven knows us oldies have picked fault with the young uns enough.

 

[michel]

I'm not sure which side of the fence I'm on.................

 

[tcprowling]

I guess this thread comes down to the way our kids see our actions
Parents place a curfew on their kids and want to know where they are and who they are with at all times. They do this in the name of protecting ther children.
However teenagers see it as being restrictive and " as being treated "like a child". Some even go so far as to put forward the point as the parents not trusting their children.

 

[Lindsey-Loo]

1. My parents are constantly critisizing my friends.
2. They freak out if I make a low average for the week.
3. Teachers give extra homework just because they've been having a bad day.
4. Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.
5. They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute.

 

[tcprowling]

Do you feel that parents re act like this based on what they did as teenagers or as an over reaction to the perception that " to day is a much more dangerous place then it was in their day?

 

[tcprowling]

1. My parents are constantly critisizing my friends.
2. They freak out if I make a low average for the week.
3. Teachers give extra homework just because they've been having a bad day.
4. Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.
5. They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute.

Yep Anade I guess as a parent, I'd have to put my hand up to being guilty to some of these.
My parents are constantly critisizing my friends.
we were pretty tolerant of my girls' friends, as most of them spent a lot of time in our house they were viewed as more of an extention of the family
2. They freak out if I make a low average for the week.
Yeppers! guilty as charged. But i feel in my case I had mitergating circumstances LOL I felt the girls were much more better then their marks/grades indicated. My youngest was brilliant in her junior grades, but went into her " Rebellious stage" in the second year of high school, and her grade fell. I was continiously on her back. It wasn't til I found some old school reports of my own that i realised I'd done exactly the same at school.
Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.
Yep sort of guilty! During their teen years We had a lot going on in our lives, some of it normal living some of it self destructive. However, we did encourage Open and frank discussions and in Life's lessons we like to think that we were sucessful, however, there were times when I feel we, thier parents didn't appreciate that what we though as trivial was really important to them.
They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute
This one can be a curly one with me! It's not that I didn't trust them, I felt that they didn't have the experience in life to deal with some certian situations I grew up bundling from pitfall to pitfall and by the time i was 21 I'd seen more of life then most people see in thier entire lifetime ( I am not bragging there just stating a fact) and it was my intention to to do my best so that they wouldn't make the same mistakes as I did.

 

[PetShopBoy88]

4. Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.
5. They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute.

Yeah...

 

[Booko]

I guess this thread comes down to the way our kids see our actions
Parents place a curfew on their kids and want to know where they are and who they are with at all times. They do this in the name of protecting ther children.
However teenagers see it as being restrictive and " as being treated "like a child". Some even go so far as to put forward the point as the parents not trusting their children.

I have always asked my kids to let me know where they are so that I am not worried, and I tell them where I am so they don't worry. My daughter messed up once, and I was very worried. I accidentally on purpose was not there after school a week later. The car was home, and they couldn't find me anywhere, and they were scared out of their minds. So they got the lesson in consideration really really fast, and haven't chafed against it, because I always show consideration for them also.

It isn't entirely about protection.

My son was upset once because he had to ride bikes on Jekyll Island with his sister when he wanted to stay home and do his own thing.

I had him call my business partner/friend and had her explain about how things are different for girls, and how the fact that she had no male to protect her left her open for three incidents of rape.

He never complained about that again either.

They get snarky about having their videogames interrupted by real life sometimes, but if it's something not urgent I stick a post it on the side of the monitor -- showing respect for their time. And if it's urgent, I make that clear, but I keep that to a minimum.

And there have been a few times when I demonstrated what it was like when they needed something from me right away, but I was "too busy" doing something fun.

If the kids see our actions from their pov, it looks very different. When they see how the shoe pinches their toes when it's on their foot, they get over the complaining pretty quickly.

Such a sneaky, devilish :devil: mom I am....

 

[Booko]

1. My parents are constantly critisizing my friends.

Ooh, I can relate to that!

My mother never liked any of my friends. Not even now that I'm an adult. She always wanted me to chum around with kids of people she was friends with. They were into booze and getting pregnant early, and to this day she has no clue how misguided she's been about who I should have for friends.

She also gets very jealous of any single female friends I have. So I always refer to my girlfriends in terms of the "couples" we know, just to avoid the nonsense. sheesh...and at my age?

4. Adults believe that all of our problems aren't really that important.

Some things may be easy for us now that we're older, but being 15 was just as tough for us then as it is for our teenagers now. We forget that too often.

5. They don't trust that we can make the right choices in certain situations, so they feel that they must be there to guide us every minute.

Trustworthiness is one of the greatest virtues any child can cultivate, and parents have to be ready to acknowledge that virtue in their kids by giving them the chance to do things on their own. I don't get the overprotectedness. Do we think we can have kids in the house and micromanage them, and then send them off to college or work on their own, and magically they'll have some self-control?

I have given my kids opportunities to screw up, in small ways that are not dangerous at first, and over time the opportunities get bigger. They've done pretty well, usually the screw ups are limited to disastrous attempts to bake cookies in my absence. :biglaugh: They've proven themselves to be trustworthy.

The problem parents have is when kids have *not* proven themselves trustworthy, but think they should be treated as if they are.

They need to understand that trust is earned slowly, and lost quickly. This is just as important for adults to understand as it is for kids. :yes:

 

[Purple Thyme]

Just a post as parent, we may have our faults, I'm sure my kids can list them for you in a heartbeat but just to let all you younger ones know - my twin nephews just graduated High school this year and both are off to start college this week. I said goodbye to one last night and cried when I left him because I was soo proud of him. I sure I've driven him nuts sometimes but everything I did was because I loved him and he thanked me last night. So cut your parents a break once in awhile and if their getting too lost in everyday life, gently bring them back. Parents sometimes lose their way too and we need your guidance as well.I'm crying all over again and my nephew is only 2 hours away:sad4: Silly me.

 

[Tigress]

The one thing that really bothers me about a lot of my 'elders' is that they, for whatever reason, seem to forget, whether 'conveniently' or not, what it's like to be young(er). They will often 'talk down' to us, as if we're only half a person, and with little to no brains. At 20, I've not forgotten what it's like to be 2, 6, 10, 14, etc. Guide us, not walk our path for us, or hand out step-by-step instructions.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

1) I may have only lived for 20 years, but I have lived through some hard times. I hate it when older people assume because of my youth, I don't know what real hardships are.
2)I do give good advice. My youth is no reason to deem my advice, predictions, stated facts, as meer luck. I have even been ignored when I told a group of people what day it was, and the buffet resturant doesn't have steak on this night, it was last night.
3)Elders brag and have a since of joy in remembering thier delinquent youth years. Lying to go to concerts, hiding drug use, being with people thier parents hate, and other delinquent activites. They can be proud, but the young ones aren't even supposed to think about it.
4) The Elders tend to think our problems as being petty. I almost lost a very close friend to suicide because of this. "No, his schizophrenia, paranoya are nothing major, and those voices that tell you everyone hates you and you should end your life now, just tell them to shut up." That's pretty much what happened, and then he tried to OD on over 70 pills and nearly died.
5) I have lived nearly all of my live a loner. Now why of a sudden do people seem concerned about me? My mom found out I drink, smoke weed, and some other things, but why is she only concerned about me after she discovered my stash?
6) (This one also really bugs me, even though the OP said five) Why am I supposed to conform to thier views of how people should behave and look. I do not look like a girl because of my long hair. Last time I checked, women generally don't have big shoulders, facial hair, hairy arms and legs, or have very deep voices. I view my body as a canvas, why shouldn't I get tattoos? I don't believe in Christ, so to answer you'r question, I will not read this little green bible, and you will not see me in church on Sunday. And I am not some evil heathen because I love the night, and I often walk the streets during the night. And what about my music? Or are just jealous the artist in your days didn't go nearly as fast or hard that artist today go?