The "Rebellious" Stage

[Druidus]

I guess we call it "The Rebellious Stage" because we don't know how else to explain it. We'd rather call it "just a phase" than accept any responsibility, right?

At the time of writing (just FYI), I'm 20 - not too long ago I went through the so-called "phase", experienced the whole "generation gap", heard all its theories, and tried to understand both sides of most arguments. Most. Some of them were just plain absurd

So, here are my findings:

It's not a "Just a Phase"
So what if most teens go through it? That doesn't mean its some sort of instinctive thing thats inbred into human nature.

Things that happen around people influence them in some way or another. Younger kids (0-10 give or take a few years) who still believe fairy tales and that stuff, tend to believe just about anything you tell them. Then after a while they start to realise that fairy tales aren't true. The question "WHY?" starts to bug them.

If they're smart, they can do some other research on the stuff they're fed at school and find out a lot of it is one-sided or untrue as well.

Because it happens to just about everyone, is it human nature? Or is it because just about everyone gets brought up in the same way?

Rather than go and study all sorts of deep psychology books, I'm just going to speak from my own experience. Personally, my "rebellious stage" started when my school started to change from its free and open atmosphere into the usual rigid style like your average school (long story). Now most people have never been to a nice school like mine used to be, but...

I think it's really bad to just shrug this off as nothing more than a meaningless phase.

The connection
The rebellious phase and the generation gap are closely connected. To put it simply:
Most adults shrug off the rebellious phase as something that will automatically go away, so they don't really talk with their kids about it. If their kids try to ask questions, make a point, or say anything "rebellious", the parents seem to avoid getting into an intelligent conversation about such matters (hey, it's gonna fade away anyway - why bother?). So the kids get the impression they can't talk to their parents about it (or maybe they never even tried, cause their friends told them about THEIR unsuccessful attempts with THEIR parents)... so they talk less and less, and snap back with things like "You wouldn't understand!" more often.

I believe most parents are perfectly capable of understanding all that rebellious stuff, they're just too "parentish" about it - they'd rather give their kids advice than LISTEN to what they have to say. The parents might start to listen to something their son/daughter says, then it'll remind them of what happened in THEIR childhood, and what they learned from it way back then, so they interrupt and pour out all the advice. Now the kid feels misunderstood because he/she didn't get to finish explaining when all he/she wanted was someone to LISTEN.

Don't get me wrong - advice is good... but only when you actually WANT it.

~ SoulRiser

What do you think? A phase? Or genuine search for answers?

 

[NothingIsNot]

To find out if its in our nature:
1. Is it universal? Yes, it happens in every culture around the world.
2. What about our closest relative that share 98.5% of our genes? Yes, adolescent chimps go through such a phase. (look it up if you don't believe me, or ask me to look it up for you and send you a link some other time if you wish, 'cause its late and I'm tired. Or I also have books and a video about chimps that proves it.)

Therefore, this so-called phase is part of Human Nature.

 

[kreeden]

Yes , I would say that it is a " phase ". However , it is a natural phase and one needed for the developement of the human character . in my opinion . A " Rite of Passage " if you will , from child to adult . Each of us have our own way of going about it , and some take longer then others , but I believe that we each do to some degree . It is all about finding yourself and your way in life .

 

[Fluffy]

Well I can only hope I carry on suffering from this phase for the rest of my life. A think a part of me might die on the inside if I ever stop rebelling.

What if we lived in a society with a complete lack of controls and regulations? How could teenagers go through a rebelling "phase" then?

 

[Druidus]

I know that it exists in chimps (and gorrillas and bonobos too), but it isn't rebellion. It's mere aggression, which is caused by the slight drop in seratonin throughout adolescence. Seratonin levels eventually normalize. However, should they questions one asks in such a "phase" be ignored? This "phase" has also been linked to depression, and sadly, many teens afflicted with depression are unable to get treatment, because it's "just a phase".

I don't know if I've ever gone through such a "phase". I've always questioned the authorities, and I always will. It's the only logical thing to do.

 

[MagickIsFun]

I think it is both.