Teaching Children about Religion

[Bennettresearch]

The problem is, with religion you are teaching opinion and not fact. =) Slight difference.

It is just as true if one is an atheist. This is also an opinion. I'll bet that even as open minded as you are purporting to be here that you would teach at least one opinion to your child as a fact. All parents do this.

So you do not believe that a child can be told one idea over and over again without hearing a different idea from someone they would respect enough to actually consider that idea? My boss has a daughter that is in 4th grade. Her daughter came home one day and said that her friend told her that she was lied to because her friend said that babies are delivered in the mail, yet my boss told her daughter exactly where babies come from. The next day my bosses daughter came home and told my boss that her friend was told that my boss was a liar and that babies really were "delivered" in the mail. =P Seems to me it is quite possible to do this even in this day and age.
I would teach my children about different religions, not just saying one is true.
Children have a mind of their own? I already provided links that shows that if children are under strict rules they tend to be the same religion as their parents... do you have different evidence?

Certainly this was a learning experience for everyone involved. I don't think that it is any kind of proof of brainwashing. Children do have an impressionable age and they will eventually get through it. I don't really need to provide evidence of this, it is something one learns when raising children. I successfully raised two step daughters who have minds of their own and have good common sense to not believe everything that they hear. They were raised in a christian household and were not brainwashed in the least. I think to generalize about some examples of children parroting their parents views does not apply to all children. There is a doubting age and a rebellion age that children go through also. These are challenges that parents face. Indeed, I am hearing more and more about parents not having control of their children nowadays.

I know what you are talking about. I have had more than one experience with someone who is dogmatic in their thinking. I had to overcome a less than desirable childhood and had to go out into the world ill equiped to deal with it properly. I wouldn't have it any other way at this point because it made me stonger and the challenge made me a lot smarter than I might have been had I the ideal upbringing. This is why I may give children more credit than you do.

 

[Bennettresearch]

Why shouldn't I teach my children about Unitarian Universalism's 7 Principles in langauge they can understand and relate to? For example, I'm not going to tell them that we believe in "the inherent worth and dignity of every person" they have no idea what that means. But they can understand, "every person is important". We even have a cute little song to help them learn the 7 Principles (yes, I've just been waiting for a reason to post this, lol) :

(Sung to the tune of DO-RE-MI)

ONE -- Each person is important

TWO -- Be kind in all you do

THREE -- We're free to learn together

FOUR -- And search for what is true

FIVE -- All people need a vote

SIX -- Build a fair and peaceful world

SEVEN -- We care for Earth's lifeboat

That will bring us back to me and UU... (repeat)

Why shouldn't I introduce the Chalice to them at a young age? They may not understand it's history or significance, but they know it's something special to us. I'm not saying we should teach UU Theology to 6 year-olds, but there is so much from the time of birth that a child picks up on and learns and if we don't recognize that we've lost time of teaching them things we want them to know. That doesn't mean they can't learn it later. But it's a lot easier to teach sharing, for example, to a 2 year-old than to an 8 year-old who has never had to share before.

Hi Maize,

I think that what the doubters are missing here is that religion can have good things to offer and is not necessarily a dogmatic brainwashing session that leaves them in the dark. This is a wonderful song but let me make an analogy here. Let's say for example that one of the things in this song weren't true. I don't think that it would damage a child and when they grew older they may see things a little differently. This is part of our learning experience. And so it would go with a child brought up in a household with only one religion. One cannot point to religion and say that it is the only source of ignorance and closed mindedness.

 

[Bennettresearch]

Another thing about that: I can certainly see a UU teaching a child about all religions, but I couldn't do that. I don't think all religions are equal. While I can certainly acknowledge the truth in any religion, I think my religion is the most true. For everybody, not just "true for me." I wouldn't teach my children about other religions until I gave them my religion first, as a firm base from which to scrutinise (find the truth but also the falsehood in) other religions.

Hi NN,

Yes, parenting is hard work. When we were going through the nightly struggle with homework I devised a plan. We had nightly sessions of what it all meant. I got the point across that they were learning how to think and figure things out. These tools would benefit them when they were older by being able to be objective and analytical to get the information that they needed. They actually embraced the pain of mathematics and other hard subjects for them. It got a lot easier. This also applied to learning their spirituality as something that would benefit them throughout their life.

 

[Bennettresearch]

Yes, but if religion is something one should choose for themself, then how can you justify this? Also, if you believe you raised your child right, and that they are intelligent, and that your religion is the right one... how can you believe that growing them up in an environment where they have no ability to choose their religion later in life (ie brainwashing) is better than growing them up in an environment where they are allowed to choose? Because if you are confident in your parenting skills and your religion they should always choose your religion...

My point is that they will be brainwashed and never be given the chance to make that choice.

That is good that they became agnostics on their own, but the truth of the matter is most children do grow up to be the same faith as their parents when they live in a strict religious environment with lots of religious rules.

Hi Ryan,

I think I found the point I have been trying to make here. On the one hand a religion was taught, and on the other the child became an agnostic. This child was allowed to make up their own mind and wasn't restricted by a dogmatic brainwashing at all.

I had a lot of friends that rebelled against a strict religious household. It is this rebellion that makes me want to give them some credit. I don't think anyone here is advocating that strictness as a standard. If this was your experience you have obviously learned from it and have developed your own ideals about how children are raised. I would certainly credit you with having a mind of your own and give others that credit as well.

 

[Terrywoodenpic]

If children are brought up in a Christian home, they will become aware of Religion long before they are taught about it.
They will see it at meal times and bed times, when the family go to church, even at their Christening.
Most of these thing ony touch lightly on their lives at first, but a knowledge of God and Jesus slowly grows and becomes an intrinsic part of their lives.
Later they may move away from religion, but if and when they hear God calling them, they have a solid base to grow from...

As for when they should be taught I put 4-7. But in reality I would say, answer questions whenever they come, but only teach when they show they understand Your answers.

Terry_______________________--
Blessed are those who bring peace, they shall be children of God

 

[James the Persian]

As for when they should be taught I put 4-7. But in reality I would say, answer questions whenever they come, but only teach when they show they understand Your answers.

My attitude precisely.

James

 

[SSN]

Children understand very little in the world
So why should we tell how the world was created
I agree with fascist christ we shouldnt teach them religion until they are in their teens

 

[Terrywoodenpic]

You gravely underrate the abilities of children.
Children not only want to know about everything, but also their brains are at their peak for learning.
It is a sign of a very poor school that believes that Their children don't want to learn and can't be taught.


Terry________________________-
Blessed are those who bring peace, they shall be children of God

 

[SSN]

Ever hear the saying children seen not heard
I was a child once
You too
Children dont have a clue about reasoning
Why should we try to reason Religion onto them
Let them enjoy their youth
before telling them about the evils of the world
When they get older they will choose to have faith and if they have any good in them they will choose yes

 

[James the Persian]

Ever hear the saying children seen not heard
I was a child once
You too
Children dont have a clue about reasoning
Why should we try to reason Religion onto them
Let them enjoy their youth
before telling them about the evils of the world
When they get older they will choose to have faith and if they have any good in them they will choose yes

I am very surprised to see this attitude coming from a Roman Catholic. Do you not take your children to Mass, and do you not believe that your Mass teaches the faith, as we believe of our Divine Liturgy? How then, do you not teach them until their teens? Do you leave them home when you go to Church?

James

 

[Terrywoodenpic]

As I said You underrate children.
I can remember from the age three and I was certainly reasoning.
My Granddaughter was doing multipart jigsaw pozzels at that age.

Terry______________________---
Blessed are those who bring peace, they shall be children of God

 

[James the Persian]

As I said You underrate children.
I can remember from the age three and I was certainly reasoning.
My Granddaughter was doing multipart jigsaw pozzels at that age.

My son (at least I think he's mine - his love of numbers is something he doesn't get from me or his mother, which sometimes makes me wonder if he's a changeling ) is also three and doing jigsaws. I'd say he's obsessed with them. He's certainly reasoning. He's also asking questions at (not so good) and after Liturgy and clearly has a desire to learn about our faith. He loves going to Liturgy and gets excited before we go. We've followed the same sort of path as you advocated, not pushing but answering questions. We only teach when he's ready and we know he's ready because he asks. I agree with you that SSN is seriously underestimating, at least some, children.

James

 

[SSN]

If you bring a child to Mass it would just sit there and think about what its going to do when it goes home
they dont listen in church
they dont even understand what the priest is saying
i became a Catholic when i was 14 but that doesnt mak we less of a Catholic
i go to church ever week with my son(7)
But i never explained to him yet what religion is really about

 

[SSN]

did you not tell your son yet they are other Religions
Maybe he can ask questions about them
I would do that to my son in his teens but since your son is ready why not give him a choice to choose his faith

 

[SSN]

Since when was doing jigsaws the true meaning of reasoning
So if my dog brings my back a bone those that mean he can reason too

 

[James the Persian]

Not sure why you posted three times, but here are some answers. No, I don't teach my son about other religions and nor shall I unless he asks about them. Why would I teach him about something I believe to be incorrect?

I can assure you that my son does not just sit back and listen or, for that matter, sit much at all. We don't actually have pews. He takes part in the Liturgy as much as he is able, as we all do. He prays (simply), venerates icons and the Tetraevanghelion, lights candles, takes the Eucharist and asks questions. He certainly does understand much of what is said (though the Romanian used is sometimes beyond him).

I'm not sure why you came up with the 'I became Catholic at 14' thing. I became Orthodox at 25, but that doesn't make me any less Orthodox. I'm not at all sure where you think that anyone implied that it would.

As for jigsaws, Terry raised it because you said young children were incapable of reasoning. Nobody said that doing jigsaws was the 'true meaning of reasoning', but seeing as working out which pieces go where requires reasoning, it does show that your belief was wrong. A dog bringing you a bone would require no reasoning whatsoever.

In my opinion, if a child is capable of asking a question then it's my duty as a parent to try and answer that question. That's all I do, but that is teaching, albeit informal teaching, hence I agree with Terry's position rather than yours.

James

 

[Terrywoodenpic]

Since when was doing jigsaws the true meaning of reasoning
So if my dog brings my back a bone those that mean he can reason too

The ability to do complex jigsaws is a recognised and useful measure of a childs development.

For a dog to bring you a bone is unusual, as they are usually pretty uptight if you even touch one.
I am not sure how you should measure a dog's reasoning ability, but it is clear that it does vary between individual dogs.

Terry_________________________-
Blessed are those who bring peace, they shall be children of God

 

[SSN]

if you brought your son to the toy shop would he say daddy i dont want that its to expensive
thats what i meant by reasoning

 

[SSN]

he will find out himself about other religions so wouldnt it be better to tell him yourself
whats the point to listen if you dont understand
i said that to imply i wasnt thought religion until i was 14 in other words i wasnt baptized until 14
a dog does need to reason if he is to share his bone with me
children ask alot of questions but thats not to say it will understand the answers

 

[SSN]

i changed my religion status because people thought i was a strick Catholic
im a catholic but i dont agree with the Bible
therefore i seek my own faith and contact God personally