Mark Dohle
Well-Known Member
Stepping over the wall of fear
(For a retreat this weekend)
Fear is a great gift given to us to help us stay alive in a world where anything can happen in an instant. Rational fears need to be listened to and followed.
It is irrational fears that can cause havoc in life. We can freeze, almost go into a fetal position on an emotional level, and be undone. Often over things that are not that big of a threat, or what is being asked of us, that is in reality life-affirming.
It is possible for people to allow fear to so dominate their lives that they live in constant terror of being put in a position where they will have to do something about what bothers them, or causes them deep distress.
Relationships are one of the areas where this fear can even lead to death. Fear of making others angry, or hurting their feelings, or losing their 'friendship' can empower others to dominate and control their lives. When all they have to do is to speak up or move out. yet it is not that simple I know. I have fears that I still deal with and have to constantly work on them.
If we are in a really dangerous relationship, then we need to get out and not wait for something to happen. Seeking help is important, or even calling the authorities if it gets too bad.
There is no easy solution to how we handle fear. But if we do nothing, then nothing happens, but eventually, things will get worse.
Every time we do not step over the wall of fear, it gets higher, and next time is more difficult to deal with.
When the courage arises that allows the taking of responsibility of the state we are in, is the beginning of breaking the cycle of victimhood.--Br.MD