My opinion: The dynamics of dating sites (in general)

[PoetPhilosopher]

Dating sites have become a popular avenue for individuals seeking connections in the digital age.

While these platforms offer exciting possibilities, they often exhibit distinctive patterns in the way different genders and sexual orientations interact, I find.

In the realm of online dating, men sometimes exhibit behavior reminiscent of interactions between frat buddies. In my opinion. This can perhaps be attributed to various factors, including societal expectations and the influence of hookup culture. Some men approach dating sites with a casual mindset, seeking temporary encounters rather than meaningful connections. As a result, they may engage in superficial conversations, objectify others, or prioritize physical appearance over emotional compatibility. However, it is important to note that not all men on dating sites fall into this category.

Women on dating sites often display heightened expectations, and scrutiny of potential matches. Due to societal pressures and the perceived abundance of options - as far as I can tell, some women adopt a more critical stance when interacting with potential partners online. This can lead to an increased emphasis on attractiveness, financial stability, or social status during the selection process. On the other hand, some men may feel the pressure to conform to these expectations, and/or struggle to meet the standards set by said women. However, I should note this generalization doesn't apply to all women, nor all women online.

LGBT Individuals: LGBT individuals often find opportunities for connections, but these connections may tend to be more temporary than lasting. While dating platforms tend to provide a space for members of the LGBT community to explore their identities and seek companionship, societal factors and personal circumstances can contribute to shorter-term connections, in my opinion. Some LGBT individuals may face challenges in finding like-minded individuals, or experience a lack of acceptance, leading to a higher turnover rate in relationships formed on dating sites. Nonetheless, this tendency doesn't apply to every LGBT individual, nor every LGBT individual online.

My conclusions:

Dating sites offer a diverse range of experiences for individuals seeking relationships. However, certain patterns can be observed regarding how different genders and sexual orientations interact within these platforms. Men may sometimes treat others on dating sites like frat buddies, in my opinion, with a focus on casual encounters. Women may come off as displaying harsh expectations and adopt a more critical approach in their interactions online. LGBT individuals, while tending to form connections, may experience a higher turnover rate due to various societal and personal factors. It is important to remember that these generalizations I expressed are my own opinion, and do not apply universally, nor do I believe that they do apply universally.

 

[Exaltist Ethan]

Men and women have this behavior outside of dating sites too. I literally had a girl tell me while she's drunk that she was attracted to me but was afraid of "settling" with just me. I am a man who is less interested in sex and more focused on building good relations with others. I have tried dating sites and find all of them to be cash-grabs. It's free to make your profile, but as soon as you want to actually use it, they want $30 a month or something. I've talked to some of these women on these sites and they've admitted to me plainly that they aren't looking for a long-term partner but rather someone to go on and pay for dates with them. I was disgusted by this.

There are better ways of meeting people that don't involve traditional dating websites. There's Meetup.com , which is actually free, as long as you don't start your own group. Libraries, bars, clubs, churches or you can find people to spend time with at work or school. I never paid any money for a dating site and only found one of them to be useful without it, a website called Dating DNA, but that folded years ago when they couldn't find enough people to join it. I refuse to use Match.com or e-Harmony.com as someone who lives on welfare, I can't afford the cost of both the website and cost of the dates I would go on.

I have found kinship with several people who frequent this website, and I have two close friends that I keep contact with on Facebook. I still visit my parents on a monthly basis and I have a few casual friends on Discord and other places. If I want, or need, to talk to someone, I never feel like my voice isn't being heard. As far as sex goes, I never felt like I needed it to begin with, and I can take care of that part by myself. I do depend too much on the Internet for friendship, something I've lamented about in the past, but I am glad that I still have people to spend time with outside the Internet too. I don't need to have 150 friends, I have grown to accept to have only a few friends because when they are around I cherish the time they are with me.

I've learned to cope with being alone, and I don't get lonely in the same way I used to. I am discovered that I am my own best friend, as silly as that sounds. It's impossible to make friends if you don't even like yourself, and I have learned to like myself, despite all my faults. I think part of growing up is just learning to accept what you're able to do and what you're not. I'm not going to have a career, a car or a girlfriend or wife but I've learned to accept that part about myself and move on from that fact. The sooner I realized my own limitations the quicker I accepted where I am in life and stopped my depression and self-denial. I've had two major suicide attempts due to not realizing this sooner, but my last attempt is more than ten years ago.

Women aren't looking for someone on welfare because of bipolar, who isn't able to drive or hold down a job. They want a provider. I have already decided that the only provider I will be will be towards myself. I can barely take care of myself, let alone another human being. I thought that maybe by chasing women who have similar conditions as myself, I could learn to be more empathetic and build a relationship based on our faults, but from what I've experienced, it's a terrible idea to actually do that, so I have "left" the dating scene and I'm not actively pursuing a relationship. A woman who can take care of herself doesn't need me, and honestly, I don't want a woman to take care of me either. I've learned to accept this reality. I'm not an incel, I'm not a MGTOW, because I would still rather be married than be alone, but I also have come to accept my limitations. Getting into a relationship for me is just as impossible as going back to college at this point, and at this point I try my best to avoid any commitments no matter how small they are, because just like my father I can't actually commit to them.

That's my situation at least.

 

[ADigitalArtist]

I've been profoundly lucky to not have to do dating sites since I've been with my partner since ye old days of AOL. I can't say for sure what would happen if I found myself single again, but in my limited experience I think I'd rather just find friendly relationships in hobbies I already do (like tabletop gaming groups) and let them evolve naturally into romantic relationships if it comes to that. But that's probably a lot of reservation about using dating sites since I've never had the cause to.

 

[The Sum of Awe]

I dislike analyzing the dating scene, because while it's true that a lot of women have high expectations, it's what those expectations are that vary I think. I've had some positive experiences on dating apps, although it's very infrequent. I think there's just so much variation out there that you don't know what you'll find. I don't think anything is hopeless.