Hindus not keeping religious occasions when death?

[seeking the truth]

Hey guys, hope you all doing great and being safe? I would like to inquire about this situation please.

Recently one of my Aunts passed, she was an Ordained Christian Minister. My mom said she will not be celebrating the upcoming divali occasion as she would need to wait for one year "to respect the dead"

Can you guys shed some light on this for me please as I am not understanding why wait for one whole year and also since this Aunt was christian how this ties into Hindus not keeping their religious day?

 

[Vinayaka]

The retreat period following a death varies from subculture to subculture, and from person to person. The primary reason (this can vary too, or reasons are lost over time) is to not provide attachment to the soul, so that it can be released to go into the astral, and then find a new body from there. Festivals and temples are times and places where the veils between the worlds are lessened. This can be 11 days in some communities, 21, or 31 in others. That applies to everyone. However, for those immediate families that are close, or even for friends that are close, it often a whole year. That is left to the judgement of the individual, and how they personally feel. Generally the stronger the attachment, the more likely it's longer. For example, when my parents passed, I was on retreat for 31 days, but when my wife goes, I'll probably wait the full year.

Your Mom may just feel uncomfortable celebrating without her sister so chose to abstain for a year. Although we're a festival culture, there are many reasons we 'fast' from a festival too.

 

[seeking the truth]

Thanks for the explanation. It is a standard time of one year for all "westernized" hindus in my circles so no it does not have anything to do with the closeness of a passed one. This is why I had thought it was Hindu law for all hindus to wait for that time.

One of my questions was however, is this an actual Hindu law to not celebrate any religious festivals/occasions during the "retreat" period however long it may be please?

 

[Rival]

MOVED TO RELIGIONS Q&A.​

 

[Vinayaka]

Thanks for the explanation. It is a standard time of one year for all "westernized" hindus in my circles so no it does not have anything to do with the closeness of a passed one. This is why I had thought it was Hindu law for all hindus to wait for that time.

One of my questions was however, is this an actual Hindu law to not celebrate any religious festivals/occasions during the "retreat" period however long it may be please?

It's a custom, not a law. One year is not a law. If a person willingly breaks the custom, they would lose some respect from friends and acquaintances. It's rather important in some circles. It would be similar to the custom of removing shoes in a temple.