Are Men Necessary In Raising Children?

[McBell]

Well, then let's get right to the point:

What exactly are children who have two parents of the same sex missing that is fundamental to raising a healthy child?

This wil depend entirely upon the two individuals who are rasing the child.
There are many heterosexual couples who do a terrific job at raising their children.
There are single mothers who a terrific job at raising their children.
There are single fathers who do a terrific job at raising their children.
There are many heterosexual couples who do a terrible job at raising their children.
There are single mothers who a terrible job at raising their children.
There are single fathers who do a terrible job at raising their children.
Based upon this I would say that there is truely not an 'all encompassing' reason to ban all same sex couple adoptions.

 

[Quiddity]

Fatherless homes is all the evidence I need.

 

[MaddLlama]

Fatherless homes is all the evidence I need.

All children in single mother homes, or children with two mothers turn out bad?

 

[Quiddity]

All children in single mother homes, or children with two mothers turn out bad?

It is more then likely talking about single mothers. I haven't seen a study for same-sex. And no I'm not talking about ALL but that a high majority of fatherless homes don't have good results and that's the reality.

 

[MaddLlama]

I would tend to agree with you about single parent homes. It's obviously much harder to give a child the attention he or she needs when you have to work one or more jobs. A good friend of mine lived in a single parent home since she was very young. She's not a criminal or a bad person, but she certainly has her share of problems.

Having two mothers or two father is better than only one parent.

 

[Jaymes]

That's why I said I'm not sure if we want to get into the specifics of what each gender has to offer children. You can't possibly think men are not important can you? Talk about discrimination! Gay men who are fathers wouldn't like to read that.

If something I said was interpreted as that, I apologize. I don't think either sex is inherently better for a child than another. As long as the child has a caring parent (or more if they're lucky), I couldn't care less what their sex(es) are.

 

[Quiddity]

I would tend to agree with you about single parent homes. It's obviously much harder to give a child the attention he or she needs when you have to work one or more jobs. A good friend of mine lived in a single parent home since she was very young. She's not a criminal or a bad person, but she certainly has her share of problems.

Having two mothers or two father is better than only one parent.

Just the other day my wife was looking at a male homosexual couple raising an infant on TV. She turned around looked at me (I was in the kitchen) and said "I can't look at that and say it is wrong, I just can't". They were very loving and caring toward the infant. Not that I was expecting anything else but many people certainly have that view.

Even though I do believe same-sex couples can do an excellent job (better then some hetreosexuals in some cases) in raising a child, I do think a healthy mom and dad is unmatched. I'm sorry if this offends you, but I feel pretty strong about that.

 

[Hema]

What about people who adopt or couples that use artificial insemniation?

I think the same rule should apply because they are assuming the roles of a mother and father.
(BTW your avatar is wicked cute. Every time I see it I go "Awww.")

 

[Buttercup]

If something I said was interpreted as that, I apologize. I don't think either sex is inherently better for a child than another. As long as the child has a caring parent (or more if they're lucky), I couldn't care less what their sex(es) are.

Actually, I figured you weren't really trying to say one sex was better than the other.... I just thought I'd throw a pitch in for the Y chromosome.

One aspect that hasn't been mentioned is that if a child is growing up in a same sex relationship...I don't think they would feel the potential abandonment issue that a child does who's father leaves the family. Meaning, when Jensa marries and has kids, (if she wants to have them) those kids will know that their parents relationship is the intended one. So those that think a child would feel cheated because they have no father.....this should not be an issue. They may wonder why their family is different but the abandonment aspect won't be there. And hopefully if she has some great males in her family such as her father, brother, uncles or friends, she'll let her kids see how great men can be too.

 

[Yoco]

As a student of sociology, the most important aspect of having parents of both sexes is that children take many of their sociatal cue's from their parrents. Little children learn more from thir fathers how men act, and more from their mothers how women act. It is not only important for the parrent of the same sex as the child to be present, to help enculturate (I may have just made that word up, I am not sure) the child, but also the parrent of the opposite sex is nessisary to provide examples and lessons on how members of the opposite sex act, and how to interact with them.
Spiritualy, I believe that both men and women have important roles to play in the spiritual education of the child.

This is not to say that a single parrent, or even a homosexual couple is not capable of raising a perfectly normal child. However I do believe that the best and easiest way to raise, teach and train children is with parrients of both sex cooperating in the rasing of the child.

 

[Ðanisty]

This is almost a trick question. Do children absolutely need a father? Obviously not. However, I do feel that children should grow up with role models of both sexes...not because one can't do everything but because in the real world, you have to deal with both sexes and if you don't grow up around both (could be a father, uncle, friend of the family, whatever), then you could easily not learn everything you need to know about interacting with men in general.

What I'm saying, for example is that I would have a problem with a single mother or lesbian couple that have children who have absolutely no interaction with men. The same could be said for single fathers and gay couples. Children need to be around both sexes.

So, I would say a man's influence is necessary, but not necessarily in the role of a father.

 

[Random]

There are good men people. Not all fathers are wastes of space.

Absolutely, yes, no-one would deny that. But in child-rearing, the mother is more important overall.

 

[Todd]

Are men necessary in raising children? Do they have an essential role to play that cannot be done by women? If so, what is that?

No. There are many women that bring up there children without a male role model in the house and the kids grow up to be great people.

However, I think it's a definite benefit to have a male role model in the house. For instance, having a good quality male role model helps a daughter to know how a good man acts and by observing how her dad treats her mom, when she grows up and is looking for someone to marry, she will find a good man similar to her dad. At the same time, a good male role model can show a son how a man is supposed to act in a gentlemanly (don't know if that's a real word) manner.

 

[Sunstone]

No. There are many women that bring up there children without a male role model in the house and the kids grow up to be great people.

However, I think it's a definite benefit to have a male role model in the house. For instance, having a good quality male role model helps a daughter to know how a good man acts and by observing how her dad treats her mom, when she grows up and is looking for someone to marry, she will find a good man similar to her dad. At the same time, a good male role model can show a son how a man is supposed to act in a gentlemanly (don't know if that's a real word) manner.

I have to agree with you, Todd, on the effect a good male role model can have on a daughter. I've have several young female friends who were fatherless over the years, and I've noticed that they tended not to have the same expectations about how males should treat them as their friends who were raised with fathers had. In many cases, they would put up with a lot more nonsense from their boyfriends than would the girls who had a father.

 

[Hacker]

It isn't absolutely necessary, but I think it's better for the emotional development of the child only if the father is mentally capable of being a good role model of course.

 

[Tigress]

No, I don't think a penis is necessary in raising children. Society has this idea of what's male and what's female, but from what I've seen, very few people (if any) actually fit neatly into these molds. Thus, I really don't know what there is to debate here. All arguments in favour play off of said male and female roles.

 

[Ðanisty]

No, I don't think a penis is necessary in raising children. Society has this idea of what's male and what's female, but from what I've seen, very few people (if any) actually fit neatly into these molds. Thus, I really don't know what there is to debate here. All arguments in favour play off of said male and female roles.

Except the argument of socializing children. They do need to learn to interact with women and men.

 

[Jaymes]

Except the argument of socializing children. They do need to learn to interact with women and men.

Why can't they just learn how to interact with people? Do standards for interaction need to be changed that much based on sex?

If it does, I must be doing something wrong. With the exception of relationship-interest, I treat my male and female friends pretty much the same with regards to how I interact with them.

 

[Tigress]

Except the argument of socializing children. They do need to learn to interact with women and men.

Unless their parent or parents are isolationist, living on a deserted island way out in the middle of the ocean, I fail to see the overall problem you're attempting to present.

 

[Ðanisty]

Why can't they just learn how to interact with people? Do standards for interaction need to be changed that much based on sex?

If it does, I must be doing something wrong. With the exception of relationship-interest, I treat my male and female friends pretty much the same with regards to how I interact with them.

It's not about what they can learn from the sexes. It's about how comfortable they are with them. If a child doesn't have any interaction with both sexes when they're growing up, it can make for a lot of awkwardness when they're older. Remember, I'm not saying a father has to be in the picture and that's not what the topic of this thread is anyway...I'm saying male influence. That can be any male.