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Adoption psycholgically harmful?

DallasApple

DallasApple

Depends Upon My Mood..
It's true. Homosexuals cannot have children without removing that child from at least one of their real parents. This leaves the children raised by homosexuals feeling insecure - data shows adopted kids have probs from being taken away from their biological parents. sad...
The effects of Adoption
"Major issues triggered by adoption are loss, rejection, guilt and grief."
Click to expand...

First of all I want to say this article mentions NOTHING about children specifically beign adopted by homosexuals.Its about the "affects" on an adopted child..of the adoptive parerents..and of the birth parents ...

This is why I get frustrated at the vigilant anti-abortion crowd who flimpantly say you can "have the baby and "just' put it if for adoption".Like its such a simple solution.

Love

Dallas

P.S Please excuase the mispelling of psychologically in the tile..
 
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ChristineES

ChristineES

Tiggerism
Premium Member
No, if a biological parent can't care or doesn't want to care for his or her child, it is a good thing to want to give her to a couple who can't have any children. Adoption parents are perfectly capable of loving their children as any birth parent. Love is what is important.
 
Storm

Storm

ThrUU the Looking Glass
It doesn't even have to be abusive. An unwanted child is going to be scarred, too.
 
DallasApple

DallasApple

Depends Upon My Mood..
Im refering to the hypocracy..

Adoption is "bad" for the child..for the birth parents and confusing for the adoptive parents .(because a gay couple might get it)

But if the topic is abortion..it "just give the baby away"...

Love

Dallas
 
ChristineES

ChristineES

Tiggerism
Premium Member
DallasApple said:
I'm referring to the hypocrisy..

Adoption is "bad" for the child..for the birth parents and confusing for the adoptive parents .(because a gay couple might get it)

But if the topic is abortion..it "just give the baby away"...

Love

Dallas
Click to expand...

I am pro-life, so I would prefer giving up a baby.
 
Smoke

Smoke

Done here.
DallasApple said:
Im refering to the hypocracy..

Adoption is "bad" for the child..for the birth parents and confusing for the adoptive parents .(because a gay couple might get it)

But if the topic is abortion..it "just give the baby away"...
Click to expand...
Exactly. And the hypocrisy is so blatant that no one could possibly miss it unless they were blinded by bigotry.

I think adoption is a great thing, and I admire people who are willing to go to the considerable expense and headache of adopting a child, just to give that child a safe and loving home.

My grandfather was an orphan, and while he wasn't adopted, his three younger siblings were. One of his sisters later got pregnant out of wedlock, and gave her son up for adoption; years later, he got in touch with our family. After she married, she and her husband adopted a baby girl. The other sister adopted a baby girl, too, and had four biological children as well. We always considered them all family -- the ones adopted out, and the ones adopted in. My husband has two adoptive nephews who are every bit as much his nephews as his biological nephews, too.

While most of the gay parents I know are bringing up their biological children, the ones bringing up adoptive children are exemplary parents, too.
 
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FyreBrigidIce

FyreBrigidIce

Returning Noob
I have allowed my oldest daughter to be adopted by the foster family that took care of her after being abused in my home. It was a hard decision to make and I am still haunted by that decision. I believe I did the best thing for her because I did not want her to be afraid of being home with me and my hubby. Granted we both completed a lot of parenting classes and do not repeat what we did to her to my youngest daughter who was able to be returned home to us. I was worried that the oldest would still be afraid of being abused in the future.

I know she is healthy and happy where she is but I still regret a little bit making the decision to let her be adopted. I miss her terribly and I sometimes ave dreams of being able to hug her and tell her that I love her.

I have decided to keep telling myself that I did what was best for her at the time. I keep ahold of a hope that when she is old enough she will look for me so that I can apologize for what we put her through and explain to her why I let her be adopted.

I love her very much and always will.

If I knew that a gay couple might adopt her I would have no problem with that. Love is love and as long as safety, security, and love is there then it is fine with me and I know my daughter would be taken care of.

FBI
 
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GiGi Lindsey

GiGi Lindsey

Member
DallasApple said:
First of all I want to say this article mentions NOTHING about children specifically beign adopted by homosexuals.Its about the "affects" on an adopted child..of the adoptive parerents..and of the birth parents ...

This is why I get frustrated at the vigilant anti-abortion crowd who flimpantly say you can "have the baby and "just' put it if for adoption".Like its such a simple solution.

Love

Dallas
Click to expand...
When parents opt out of pregnancy prevention & termination, but choose adoption, they burden a child with extra "baggage". However, letting go is often the best of the remaining options. It gives adoptive parents an opportunity to help thier child deal with the feelings associated with abandonment and to find ways to cope and be successful.
I have never understood any arguement against adoption by gay and lesbian couples. Since when does the private, sexual relationship of parents affect the parent-child relationship and the ability to provide a loving home for a child? What's up with that?
 
GiGi Lindsey

GiGi Lindsey

Member
FyreBrigidIce said:
I have allowed my oldest daughter to be adopted by the foster family that took care of her after being abused in my home. It was a hard decision to make and I am still haunted by that decision. I believe I did the best thing for her because I did not want her to be afraid of being home with me and my hubby. Granted we both completed a lot of parenting classes and do not repeat what we did to her to my youngest daughter who was able to be returned home to us. I was worried that the oldest would still be afraid of being abused in the future.

I know she is healthy and happy where she is but I still regret a little bit making the decision to let her be adopted. I miss her terribly and I sometimes ave dreams of being able to hug her and tell her that I love her.

I have decided to keep telling myself that I did what was best for her at the time. I keep ahold of a hope that when she is old enough she will look for me so that I can apologize for what we put her through and explain to her why I let her be adopted.

I love her very much and always will.

If I knew that a gay couple might adopt her I would have no problem with that. Love is love and as long as safety, security, and love is there then it is fine with me and I know my daughter would be taken care of.

FBI
Click to expand...
You are doing what you can to get healthy and help your family heal. I feel certain that your decision, as hard as it must have been, was probably the right one.
 
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