Worthiness

[Orias]

I am not worthy of this fire that burns in my mind and soul.

I succumb to my own venom, and ravage this temple of mine. I can never rest because of my anxious desire to seek self fulfillment, in the ways of self destruction.

At this expense, I create a filth that cramps my nerves and degrades philosophical grace.

At this expense, a potent fuel leaves me frost bitten by the fire that I attempt to apprehend, leaving me without recollection of why I am or why it matters.

At this expense...I expend myself and all who seek a justification for the ramparts of existence, to determine a greater a will.

My sword is drawn, molded out of fire and steel. Only then, can you see the flash of our sensual blade, the wisp of our graceful ignorance.

Low and behold, this fire burns within me, like sadistic pleasure. I am not of worth, because I can see the stars burn in the night sky.


I am not of worth, because I have yet to truly be burned by the mark of Origin, though its seed lies within the fabricated grasps of content, it can only grow after it has decayed.

 

[Adramelek]

Orias, are you high or somthing? If you weren't worthy of the Black Fire it would not have been enshrined within you.

Xeper.
/Adramelek\

 

[ScottySatan]

Here's what I see in your text.

First, you're unworthy, and you are self-destructive.

Second, at the expense of ??? (your unworthiness? your self destruction?), a bunch of bad **** happens to you.

Is that accurate at any level of your consciousness? If else, what did you mean?

 

[Adramelek]

This is how I see it Orias - you're still young, in your late teens. Your just now beginning to experience the pleasure and the pain of your unique existence as a Black Magician. This can be a difficult time for one as young as yourself, I went through similar transitions when I first began my way on the Path of Darkness. However, I soon realized that I had to man up and face the challenges head on, and soon realized that even though the Path of the Left may not be easy, it really isn't all that hard either. On the Path of Initiation we all naturally go through times of intense metaphysical growth, as well as, plateaus - which are only times of rest and Self-regeneration; but sometimes, for the beginner, these initiatory plateaus can be confused with stagnation of Self or in your case lack of "worthiness". Remember, these are your formative years in which you are creating the foundation for the true Black Magician which lies deep within the essence of your Being. Never forget the Black Magic dictum - "Know Thy Self."

My Brother Orias, also don't ever forget that Dark Essence which as been infused within your very Being. Think of and invoke It often, and It will thus begin to relate to you. I speak these words to you in the sure knowledge that when you think of the Lord of Darkness He will think of you! :bat:

For ever in the Black Flame!
/Adramelek\

 

[Shadow Wolf]

If you weren't worthy of the Black Fire it would not have been enshrined within you.

Those are my thoughts, and the unworthiness tends to sound more in line with the Right than the Left. The sacred flames that burn within us, it ours to with as we please. To surrender it, to let it wither into nothingness, or to fuel it and let the flame become a blazing inferno and become empowered.

 

[blackout]

Worthiness. Worth.

Your treasure chest/the Treasure Chest of You
is filled (or not) with things You have chosen.
Things You have deemed to be "of (personal) worth", to You.

The things you have put in there,
inside the Chest and Hearth of 'You',
reflect the Worth'I'ness of You (Your Own 'I').
They are a Collective 'Picture' of Your Own Self I'mage.
Of what You, yourSelf, Value
as Worthy tools of Your own Self Becoming.

As a LHP Magician, it is up to you
to WerShape (Shape the Form of) Your (Own) Self,
to the very things YOU find to be of personal WORTH (value/importance).

We are all Self created in some I'm-age or another.
Your I'm-age of Self/Self Image, is so much the Vision of Your Own Self Becoming.
(The particular I'm-agery, you would like to become/shape and form yourSelf to)

The notion of Your Worth'I'ness
is more directly and pointedly concerned though,
with the (in'trinsic) Worth of the "recepticle" You call "I".
It is like the padlock on the treasure chest of "You".
If you do not first deem and RAISE UP the VALUE of Your Own Self,
FIRST AND FOREMOST,
and Open YourSelf to the infinite Mystery of your Own unseen Glory
you will never put Wonder'full Things in the treasure chest
of Your Own Self Becoming.
You will never Cast your Own life in the Visionary I'm'age
of Your Own Self Becoming.

This is what it means (to me) to be Source'er'er,
or in my case Heiress of Source/Source'heiress.

I do so wish I had understood these things when I was young.
Really understood them.

The world is your stage.
Build (upon) and design your (own) Set.
Cast (for) your Self.
Script'ure/Script'your Own Character.
Direct the manifestation of Your Own Vision.

I Violette! Call You Orias! to Cast!
This is a Casting Call!

but

Only YOU, have the power
to Worship/WerShape Your Self.
No one else can "Self Become" 'You'.

Enkindle and Enshrine that Sacred Flame
that IS the very Heart of You.

As ShadowWolf said...

fuel it and let the flame become a blazing inferno and become empowered.

nice.

 

[Adramelek]

The sacred flames that burn within us, it ours to with as we please. To surrender it, to let it wither into nothingness, or to fuel it and let the flame become a blazing inferno and become empowered.

Shadow Wolf is spot on. The Black Gift is for us to do with as we please. Either one can ignore it, or choose to consciously excercise its powers, i.e. practice of the Dark Arts, thus energizing it. Xeper is also that which fuels the sacred spark of Being, the more you Xeper the more brilliant the Flame becomes. Hence, one of the terms in which Set refers to his Children - the "Shining Ones".

Xeper.
/Adramelek\

 

[Shadow Wolf]

To elaborate more on worthiness/unworthiness.
When we look to religions of the Right, we find they use the phrase "unworthy" to degrade the status of humans. They tell us we are unworthy of our ultimate potential, that we are weak, we are hopeless, we are scum. And by belittling us they tell us we are unworthy of anything and must submit our potential to their slave-driver of a deity just to be in good graces. They tell us God is much better than us, and we cannot even hope to be of a Godly status because we are simply unworthy.
But we walk on the path of the Left. It is our birth-right, even by nature and psychology, to live to our potential and be our own Gods and design our own fate and destiny. We make our own meaning in life. They say good things come to those who wait. I say are you going to wait for log drifting down stream when you are stuck in a river, or are you going to go attempt to swim after it should you see one? Life is often called a river, and to simply wait is to miss out on many opportunities.
We are all endowed with a sacred flame. We are indeed worthy to posses it. Some will say we are unworthy, and that we must give this away to some deity of false hope. But we realize this flame is ours. We nurture it, we feed it, we grow from the power it emits and realize we are our own Gods. We are worthy to be ourselves, and be not in the image of God, but to be in the image of ourselves.
So stand with pride, and realize the shackles are broken, and "unworthiness" is only an illusion created by those who are slaves themselves.

 

[ScottySatan]

Today this post reminded me of something else. Sometimes I'm impatient to realise my ambitions. I'm not the most influential person in my trade. I'm not particularly wealthy. I'm not the smartest person I know. I'm not a powerful magician. My life doesn't resemble a lot of the idealised Satanic lives that I read about. In some ways, I'm not worthy either. YET

But sometimes, being a guy that wants it all, I get a little disappointed at my rate of growth. Even though I always see that my progress is very fast in retrospect.

 

[Kori Houghton]

Low and behold, this fire burns within me, like sadistic pleasure. I am not of worth, because I can see the stars burn in the night sky.


I am not of worth, because I have yet to truly be burned by the mark of Origin, though its seed lies within the fabricated grasps of content, it can only grow after it has decayed.

Dude, this is just wrong. If you were Amish, you would have been discouraged to even look at the stars in the night sky. And you can't get much more RHP than the Amish.

What is this "mark of Origin" thingie you mention?

Seeds don't grow after they have decayed, but after they have nourished themselves by devouring their coverings. That content is like food, dude Your feelings of unworthiness are a sign that you have germinated. Now it is time to grow. :yes: