Wiccans: Can the Rede apply to emotional harm?

[SabahTheLoner]

I understand that the Rede "An it harm none, do what ye will" can be loosely interpreted based on what harm is. I think most can agree physical harm is a part of this, but can it also apply to emotional harm towards a person?

I'm not really talking about letting people be offended because they think you're doing witchcraft or whatever. I mean deliberately making someone feel bad and not trying to make up or even acknowledging their feelings afterwards. Running away after you hurt them badly emotionally, for example, doesn't solve anything. It just makes it worse if anything, because obviously you hate or can't be around the person who might be trying to be your friend and messed up.

(I'm asking because a Wiccan actually did this to me and I'm wondering it they violated the Rede in doing so, in which case they're a hypocrite. I don't have a grudge for Wiccans, I just am really offended by this one person because the were very rude to me after I tried to talk to them honestly.)

 

[The Kilted Heathen]

Of course it includes emotional harm.

 

[beenherebeforeagain]

I understand that the Rede "An it harm none, do what ye will" can be loosely interpreted based on what harm is. I think most can agree physical harm is a part of this, but can it also apply to emotional harm towards a person?

I'm not really talking about letting people be offended because they think you're doing witchcraft or whatever. I mean deliberately making someone feel bad and not trying to make up or even acknowledging their feelings afterwards. Running away after you hurt them badly emotionally, for example, doesn't solve anything. It just makes it worse if anything, because obviously you hate or can't be around the person who might be trying to be your friend and messed up.

(I'm asking because a Wiccan actually did this to me and I'm wondering it they violated the Rede in doing so, in which case they're a hypocrite. I don't have a grudge for Wiccans, I just am really offended by this one person because the were very rude to me after I tried to talk to them honestly.)

Just because someone professes to and tries to live by the rede, doesn't mean that they are not going to make mistakes and cause harm, intentionally or unintentionally, at some point in the lives.

 

[SabahTheLoner]

Just because someone professes to and tries to live by the rede, doesn't mean that they are not going to make mistakes and cause harm, intentionally or unintentionally, at some point in the lives.

I know that. What I'm most bothered by is that some people will cause harm and make a point of not fixing it. If you're living a by law not to cause harm, you should at least apologize if you happen to break that law.

 

[Quintessence]

While I'm not as connected with the current Wiccan community as I once was, back when I did have those connections I don't think I ever saw any of them suggest that emotional harm didn't need to be considered. When we're talking humans, emotional harm is on the whole far more damaging than physical harm.

 

[beenherebeforeagain]

I know that. What I'm most bothered by is that some people will cause harm and make a point of not fixing it. If you're living a by law not to cause harm, you should at least apologize if you happen to break that law.

Sure. There are lots of 'shoulds' out there. That person caused you harm? Sure they should apologize. Will they? I don't know; I don't know the context, what your discussion was--maybe he/she was offended by YOU or what you said, and is waiting to you to apologize. Or they didn't realize you were hurt, and see no reason to apologize.

And it may be one of those things that never gets fixed.

Sorry I can't be of any more help.

 

[SabahTheLoner]

Sure. There are lots of 'shoulds' out there. That person caused you harm? Sure they should apologize. Will they? I don't know; I don't know the context, what your discussion was--maybe he/she was offended by YOU or what you said, and is waiting to you to apologize. Or they didn't realize you were hurt, and see no reason to apologize.

And it may be one of those things that never gets fixed.

Sorry I can't be of any more help.

It's fine. It happened some months ago and honestly I tried to tell them that if I offended them, I was sorry (before all this happened, I thought they were actually one of the nicest people I ever met). I think they misunderstood me because they wouldn't talk to me at all after that. I honestly have no idea if or how I offended them, especially since they refused to talk about it. And to be honest, if they run away from everyone they don't like, that's not the kind of person I want to be friends with, because they aren't willing to talk to another human being about accidental offense. I also don't think they're being responsible for their actions if they behave like that. And to be honestly I'm not sure if they really understood emotions in the first place.

 

[SabahTheLoner]

Those aren't real Wiccans. There may be prevalences of something within a religion, but that isn't Wiccan, it's just whatever.

A lot of materialists take on various religious paths as sort of a goof, and have a logical reason they tell themselves, as to why they dont just claim materialisn, or nothing, or whatever.

Could be "luciferians", "christians", whatever, they arent actually religious

To be honest I wonder if the person I had trouble with was a greedy sort of materialist and trying to hide it. I rarely saw them wear the same thing even twice (fashion-obsessed) and I always got weird impressions when I asked about their cat scratches ("we were just playing," very quickly said.) I also wonder if they aren't Wiccan anymore because I saw them wearing fancy cross earrings after that commotion. So I think they have a lot of guilt for who they are and trying to hide it. (I'm saying they to mean one person on purpose, they're gender-queer)

 

[Desert Snake]

To be honest I wonder if the person I had trouble with was a greedy sort of materialist and trying to hide it. I rarely saw them wear the same thing even twice (fashion-obsessed) and I always got weird impressions when I asked about their cat scratches ("we were just playing," very quickly said.) I also wonder if they aren't Wiccan anymore because I saw them wearing fancy cross earrings after that commotion. So I think they have a lot of guilt for who they are and trying to hide it. (I'm saying they to mean one person on purpose, they're gender-queer)

Actually, if a group of people isn't a good experience for you, I can't encourage you to pursue Wiccanism. You may have to find another group, tbh. Fancy cross makes me think it could be the general or non-christian cross, but not sure. There are some non christian cross themes, but that is usually pretty obvious, because even the general cross ideas are used in christian religion.

This sort of depends on what you're looking for in a group.

 

[SabahTheLoner]

While I'm not as connected with the current Wiccan community as I once was, back when I did have those connections I don't think I ever saw any of them suggest that emotional harm didn't need to be considered. When we're talking humans, emotional harm is on the whole far more damaging than physical harm.

I see. I agree with you, actually, especially being a person having emotional damage from years ago still affecting how I feel. I guess it's sort of a given unless you're not a very emotional person, in which case it's hard to learn about that sort of thing. I think I had trouble understanding why someone who would follow a code like that would turn around and tell someone to not talk to them and then just run away when that person is trying to tell you they're sorry and have no idea what's going on, and there was no harm meant in the first place.

Some people are just too complicated. I mean I can respect some devoted Wiccans but I dislike it when someone can't be responsible and makes excuses. If they are still a Wiccan or religious in any way, I don't think they're being responsible about that.

 

[SabahTheLoner]

Actually, if a group of people isn't a good experience for you, I can't encourage you to pursue Wiccanism. You may have to find another group, tbh. Fancy cross makes me think it could be the general or non-christian cross, but not sure. There are some non christian cross themes, but that is usually pretty obvious, because even the general cross ideas are used in christian religion.

This sort of depends on what you're looking for in a group.

I considered being a Wiccan in the past but I simply don't agree with the cosmology or the rules. The magic is something that still interests me, though.

As for the earrings, the cross part itself was plain. It was golden and large for an earring and it had one of those cuffs on a chain that goes behind the ear. I was more suspicious of it than I was with their previous religious stance; the cross is obviously religious, but why dangle it from your ears with those chains? It makes more sense to have a necklace.

 

[Quintessence]

As much as we don't like it when we feel someone isn't being responsible or making excuses, I find it important to remember that they are human too. I'd hazard to say that not a one of us humans has all of our plants in a row, and if someone is chronically dysfunctional in some area of their lives, it's hurting them too. Not convinced that is what was going on there - often it's simply a difference in social skills or styles of interpersonal interaction that don't mesh well with each other. Often all one can do is shrug, cest la vie and move on.

 

[Desert Snake]

I considered being a Wiccan in the past but I simply don't agree with the cosmology or the rules. The magic is something that still interests me, though.

As for the earrings, the cross part itself was plain. It was golden and large for an earring and it had one of those cuffs on a chain that goes behind the ear. I was more suspicious of it than I was with their previous religious stance; the cross is obviously religious, but why dangle it from your ears with those chains? It makes more sense to have a necklace.

That is sort of vague, unless you 're implying that youare talking about the large religious or occult geoups.