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Unconditional Love: Does it exist?
- Thread starter Runt
- Start date
Ardhanariswar
I'm back!
haha. ya. yes, unconditional love does exist. some people are definite practitioners of it, some are trying to be. its a good thing.
Green Gaia
Veteran Member
Yes, absolutely. When you have children, you will understand. 
Green Gaia
Veteran Member
Well there are exceptions to every rule, but by and large, I would say most parents love their children unconditionally. Also, I can love my child, but still be upset with him over something he's done. Being upset with him doesn't lessen my love for him, but the unconditional love doesn't stop me from seeing his faults either.
Ardhanariswar
I'm back!
exactly, if you really loved the person, you would help them out and see them for who they are, thats why you love them.
Runt
Well-Known Member
See, I have been thinking about my own question, and I'm starting to think there is no such thing as unconditional love. This is simply because I can ALWAYS think of a senario that would cause me to stop loving someone. For example, if I had a boyfriend, and loved him, I would think that my love was unconditional... but then if he beat me, or cheated on me, or killed my mother, or something else like that, I'm pretty sure my love would stop immediately. Same with children. Obviously, I don't have any yet, but I DO have a little nephew (20 months!) who I have been babysitting all summer, from 7 am to 5pm every day. He is not my child, but I love him. Yet I cannot say that I love him unconditionally; as truthseekingsoul suggested, I would probably stop loving even him if he grew up into a "murderous paedophile" or a serial killer or something.
As far as I can tell, this means that love is conditional. Not unconditional. Certain conditions allow love to blossom (attraction, "chemistry", mutual interests, etc), certain conditions allow love to continue (kindness, faithfulness, communication), and if these conditions are taken away, love will die or simply will not develop...
As far as I can tell, this means that love is conditional. Not unconditional. Certain conditions allow love to blossom (attraction, "chemistry", mutual interests, etc), certain conditions allow love to continue (kindness, faithfulness, communication), and if these conditions are taken away, love will die or simply will not develop...
Bastet
Vile Stove-Toucher
Ok, so let's say I had a child, and loved him unconditionally, through many of life's ups and downs, until he reaches the age of 34. Then he is arrested for being a murdering paedophile. If, after this, I find I cannot love this child unconditionally, for the man he has become, does that make the previous 34 years of love then 'conditional', even though at the time, it wasn't?
Ceridwen018
Well-Known Member
I guess, Bastet, because the possibility of you losing love for your child was always there (he just didn't perform the necessary actions until he was 34) that would make your love conditional, even through all of those years.
For me...I don't know if this could be conditional or unconditional, but I could never love someone or something that didn't love me back. Likewise, I don't think I could ever fully stop loving someone or something that loved me.
So for instance, if my future child grows up and says 'mom, I hate you, drop dead, I'm never coming home', and he then proceded to leave and never had a change of heart, eventually I would stop loving him. I would stop until the moment he showed back up on my doorstep acknowledging his wrongs and showing he was willing to make amends, that is...then I would love him again.
Likewise, if my child grew up to be a murderous pedophile, I would be incredibly ashamed and disappointed in him, but if he still truly loved me as his mother, I could never withdraw my emotional support and abandon him.
...The first situation makes it seem like I'd be a sucker for abusive relationships--that I would keep taking back some stupid ******* just because he talks sweet to me, but that's the difference between true love and manipulation right there. I feel pretty confident that I know the difference.
For me...I don't know if this could be conditional or unconditional, but I could never love someone or something that didn't love me back. Likewise, I don't think I could ever fully stop loving someone or something that loved me.
So for instance, if my future child grows up and says 'mom, I hate you, drop dead, I'm never coming home', and he then proceded to leave and never had a change of heart, eventually I would stop loving him. I would stop until the moment he showed back up on my doorstep acknowledging his wrongs and showing he was willing to make amends, that is...then I would love him again.
Likewise, if my child grew up to be a murderous pedophile, I would be incredibly ashamed and disappointed in him, but if he still truly loved me as his mother, I could never withdraw my emotional support and abandon him.
...The first situation makes it seem like I'd be a sucker for abusive relationships--that I would keep taking back some stupid ******* just because he talks sweet to me, but that's the difference between true love and manipulation right there. I feel pretty confident that I know the difference.