Terrible pickup lines

[PoetPhilosopher]

Bad pickup lines. Let's make each other cringe and close the lids to our laptops. For those without laptops, well you may want to buy one for this occasion so that you may close it.

Spoiler: You've been warned

"Are you an exorcist? Because I'm a demon in the bedroom."

"Are you a vending machine? Cuz you a snack."

"I post on RF and you're free to read what I write."

 

[PureX]

"Stand sill! I want to see what I'm getting!" - probably never worked, ever.

 

[PoetPhilosopher]

"Your temperature is higher than Mustafar. I've been looking in Alderaan places."

 

[PoetPhilosopher]

"I don't like to brag, but when people say 'Beam me up, Scotty!', I coined that term."

 

[PoetPhilosopher]

"I'll set my phasers to stun - just for you."

 

[Cooky]

Bad pickup lines. Let's make each other cringe and close the lids to our laptops. For those without laptops, well you may want to buy one for this occasion so that you may close it.

Spoiler: You've been warned

"Are you an exorcist? Because I'm a demon in the bedroom."

"Are you a vending machine? Cuz you a snack."

"I post on RF and you're free to read what I write."

What works really well is starting up a random conversation with a woman, and then actively correcting her grammar and logic. Women love that.

 

[Epic Beard Man]

Would you grab my arm, so I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel?

 

[Dan From Smithville]

Get in the d**n van.

 

[We Never Know]

A friend was dancing with a lady and she said "you smell good, what do you have on "(of course she meant his cologne). Well he replied with "a hard on but I didn't know you could smell it".

 

[ChristineM]

Worst tried on me, "do you have and Welsh in you!"
Bored me. "No".
Guy "Do you want some?"

 

[shunyadragon]

"I want fo count your freckles."

Woman responds, "I don't have any freckles."

"I bet you I can find at least one."

 

[Revoltingest]

For rubenesque gals...
"For a fat girl you don't sweat much."

For Amish gals....
"Do the come to barn raisings often?"
"Thine buggy is b1tch'n."

And the all time least effective pick-up line in history.....

Spoiler

How'd you like to come up & see my antique machine tool collection?

 

[columbus]

Worst tried on me, "do you have and Welsh in you!"
Bored me. "No".
Guy "Do you want some?"

It worked for me, a couple of times.
Except I'm Irish.
Tom

 

[PoetPhilosopher]

It worked for me, a couple of times.
Except I'm Irish.
Tom

"Do you have a Welsh in you?"
"No"
"That's good, because I'm Irish"

You know, that might just work on the right person.

 

[columbus]

"Do you have a Welsh in you?"
"No"
"That's good, because I'm Irish"

You know, that might just work on the right person.

Anything will work on the right person.
Tom

 

[PoetPhilosopher]

Anything will work on the right person.
Tom

True. @Wirey made my knees all weak with that "Rubber chicken in the bathtub during Thanksgiving football" line.

 

[columbus]

True. @Wirey made my knees all weak with that "Rubber chicken in the bathtub during Thanksgiving football" line.

Don't be making up stuff.
@Wirey says enough outrageous things on his own.

Like when he went on for weeks about the camera equipment he'd bought, then told me I was "fair".
I sheetrocked my bathroom window.
Tom

 

[Rational Agnostic]

Bad pickup lines. Let's make each other cringe and close the lids to our laptops. For those without laptops, well you may want to buy one for this occasion so that you may close it.

Spoiler: You've been warned

"Are you an exorcist? Because I'm a demon in the bedroom."

"Are you a vending machine? Cuz you a snack."

"I post on RF and you're free to read what I write."

"Did you grow up on a chicken farm? Because you sure know how to raise a cock."

"Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a footlong."

 

[FooYang]

"Hi, did you fall from heaven? because you broke my nose"

 

[FooYang]

Buddhist pickup line:

"Daymn gerl, you gotta be the most Selfless girl I've ever seen. You're so hot that I've nearly lost my own Self and attained Nibbana!!"