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Sobriety sucks!

Spiderman

Veteran Member
So far sobriety is hell. I've officially declared war on dope starting July 29th, the one-year anniversary of my relapse. ( Coincidentally, it is also the birthday of Benito Mussolini).

I put a sign on the outside of my door saying do not sell or offer me dope.

I thought God was going to provide some sort of extraordinary Grace, so that quitting would not be miserable.

That Grace never showed. It's hella miserable. Seriously lucky I don't own fire arms or I'd be so very likely to eat a bullet.

After that first month of sobriety, sobriety no longer sucks. But for now, the brain is lacking dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin. The body is also malnourished. As soon as I stand up to do something I just groan and want to lay back down.... Just lay around all day in bed.

I hate how complicated this stupid human brain is, so needy of so much that I'm not able to provide. I'm pissed at God for not putting to death my body so I can just be a spirit.

As long as I'm trapped in this body, it will constantly be crying out for nutrition, chemicals, comforts, and luxuries that don't last.

I'm so pissed off that God ever gave me life!

But anyway, I'm extremely serious about sobriety. I've been enslaved to drug addiction since I was a teenager. Rehab is not the answer. It does me no good.

The authors of the 12 steps realized that we cannot overcome this disease without a power greater than ourselves. Either God or something greater than myself provides the miracle or it's not going to happen.

I'm putting forth my willpower, but willpower doesn't win the battle.

Pray to your higher power that I be drug free. Thanks!
 

Nakosis

Non-Binary Physicalist
Premium Member
So far sobriety is hell. I've officially declared war on dope starting July 29th, the one-year anniversary of my relapse. ( Coincidentally, it is also the birthday of Benito Mussolini).

I put a sign on the outside of my door saying do not sell or offer me dope.

I thought God was going to provide some sort of extraordinary Grace, so that quitting would not be miserable.

That Grace never showed. It's hella miserable. Seriously lucky I don't own fire arms or I'd be so very likely to eat a bullet.

After that first month of sobriety, sobriety no longer sucks. But for now, the brain is lacking dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin. The body is also malnourished. As soon as I stand up to do something I just groan and want to lay back down.... Just lay around all day in bed.

I hate how complicated this stupid human brain is, so needy of so much that I'm not able to provide. I'm pissed at God for not putting to death my body so I can just be a spirit.

As long as I'm trapped in this body, it will constantly be crying out for nutrition, chemicals, comforts, and luxuries that don't last.

I'm so pissed off that God ever gave me life!

But anyway, I'm extremely serious about sobriety. I've been enslaved to drug addiction since I was a teenager. Rehab is not the answer. It does me no good.

The authors of the 12 steps realized that we cannot overcome this disease without a power greater than ourselves. Either God or something greater than myself provides the miracle or it's not going to happen.

I'm putting forth my willpower, but willpower doesn't win the battle.

Pray to your higher power that I be drug free. Thanks!

It's tough, good luck.

Drink lots of water. :)
 

Spiderman

Veteran Member
I'm as serious about sobriety now as I've ever been, but damn it's more tough now than ever because my drug use was heavier this past year then any other year of my life.

I'm seriously thinking about checking into a hospital for a week just so I can get that week of sobriety. The only thing stopping me from that is the sunshine is so helpful, and the cathedral and mass is helpful too; and I don't want to cost a bunch of taxpayers dollars.

Hospitals cost about $1,000 a day. I'll spare hardworking tax payers that madness.
 

The Hammer

[REDACTED]
Premium Member
So far sobriety is hell. I've officially declared war on dope starting July 29th, the one-year anniversary of my relapse. ( Coincidentally, it is also the birthday of Benito Mussolini).

I put a sign on the outside of my door saying do not sell or offer me dope.

I thought God was going to provide some sort of extraordinary Grace, so that quitting would not be miserable.

That Grace never showed. It's hella miserable. Seriously lucky I don't own fire arms or I'd be so very likely to eat a bullet.

After that first month of sobriety, sobriety no longer sucks. But for now, the brain is lacking dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin. The body is also malnourished. As soon as I stand up to do something I just groan and want to lay back down.... Just lay around all day in bed.

I hate how complicated this stupid human brain is, so needy of so much that I'm not able to provide. I'm pissed at God for not putting to death my body so I can just be a spirit.

As long as I'm trapped in this body, it will constantly be crying out for nutrition, chemicals, comforts, and luxuries that don't last.

I'm so pissed off that God ever gave me life!

But anyway, I'm extremely serious about sobriety. I've been enslaved to drug addiction since I was a teenager. Rehab is not the answer. It does me no good.

The authors of the 12 steps realized that we cannot overcome this disease without a power greater than ourselves. Either God or something greater than myself provides the miracle or it's not going to happen.

I'm putting forth my willpower, but willpower doesn't win the battle.

Pray to your higher power that I be drug free. Thanks!

I wish you well on your sobriety journey. The first couple months can be hell, and that is the crucial time to be going to AA, IMO. I quit drinking, but it was no cake walk, and I relapsed numerous times.

Havamal — 12
There is not as much good
as men claim there is
in alcohol for one’s well-being.
A man knows less
as he drinks more,
and loses more and more of his wisdom

God isn't necessary for sobriety (or Gods), you just need to be able to let go and forgive yourself, which I know is much easier said than done.
 

Hockeycowboy

Witness for Jehovah
Premium Member
I'm as serious about sobriety now as I've ever been, but damn it's more tough now than ever because my drug use was heavier this past year then any other year of my life.

I'm seriously thinking about checking into a hospital for a week just so I can get that week of sobriety. The only thing stopping me from that is the sunshine is so helpful, and the cathedral and mass is helpful too; and I don't want to cost a bunch of taxpayers dollars.

Hospitals cost about $1,000 a day. I'll spare hardworking tax payers that madness.
No, do it!! The longer you stay drug-free, the easier it should get! I wish I could help you, somehow.
As you asked, I will pray to Jehovah in your behalf!
You try it: address your prayer to Him (Jehovah), through Jesus (remember Jesus said, “No one comes to the Father, except through Me.”) John 14:6b



And thank Him, too, for the good things you do have! Philippians 4:5-6

Wish you all the best, my cousin.
 

Hockeycowboy

Witness for Jehovah
Premium Member
Remember, Jehovah lets us ‘reap what we sow’, Galatians 6:7.

So if He doesn’t remove the problem, He will at least give us the strength to ‘bear / endure it.’ 1 Corinthians 10:13.
 

Spiderman

Veteran Member
No, do it!! The longer you stay drug-free, the easier it should get! I wish I could help you, somehow.
As you asked, I will pray to Jehovah in your behalf!
You try it: address your prayer to Him (Jehovah), through Jesus (remember Jesus said, “No one comes to the Father, except through Me.”) John 14:6b



And thank Him, too, for the good things you do have! Philippians 4:5-6

Wish you all the best, my cousin.
I need your prayers! Thank you! :)
 
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