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Sell Me A God

JustGeorge

JustGeorge

Not As Much Fun As I Look
Staff member
Premium Member
I'm bored, so I thought of creating a game...

Sell me a God(or Goddess)! Explain to us why you think this God/dess should get our attention, and why we should all include them in our life.

A catch is you may not use any sales tactics that involve downgrading other Gods. Saying "because he/she is the only or best would bring other deities into it, and that's not allowed here. Also, think carefully before giving a title... "creator deity" or "goddess of love" is only relative to one system, so it may not be very convincing(there are many creators and deities of love out there).

Anyone can play, and the deity you choose to 'sell' doesn't have to be yours. You may not sell lifestyles, worldviews, prophets, or gurus. Just deities. :)
 
Secret Chief

Secret Chief

nirvana is samsara
Stevicus said:
Do you offer free delivery? How about a money back guarantee?
Click to expand...
In order to keep prices down, it's strictly Click & Collect.
You can have your deity on 28 day trial. If at the end of that time you still have feelings of boredom you can exchange the Xoxoi for any of the other deities in our fantastic range (subject to availability - ie omnipresence).
 
Martin

Martin

Spam, wonderful spam (bloody vikings!)
Secret Chief said:
In order to keep prices down, it's strictly Click & Collect.
You can have your deity on 28 day trial. If at the end of that time you still have feelings of boredom you can exchange the Xoxoi for any of the other deities in our fantastic range (subject to availability - ie omnipresence).
Click to expand...

Do you do an extended warranty, in case the deity proves to be faulty?
 
Heyo

Heyo

Veteran Member
JustGeorge said:
I'm bored, so I thought of creating a game...

Sell me a God(or Goddess)! Explain to us why you think this God/dess should get our attention, and why we should all include them in our life.

A catch is you may not use any sales tactics that involve downgrading other Gods. Saying "because he/she is the only or best would bring other deities into it, and that's not allowed here. Also, think carefully before giving a title... "creator deity" or "goddess of love" is only relative to one system, so it may not be very convincing(there are many creators and deities of love out there).

Anyone can play, and the deity you choose to 'sell' doesn't have to be yours. You may not sell lifestyles, worldviews, prophets, or gurus. Just deities. :)
Click to expand...
This god is real and I can prove his existence with a very simple syllogism:

P1: Clapton is god
P2: Clapton exists (and is real)
C: God exists

Evidence for P2:
 
sun rise

sun rise

The world is on fire
Premium Member
Since this is an interfaith discussion and not a joke thread, Shiva is offering to visit you for no charge. It may be a costly visit given His destructive tendencies which is why there's no up front charge for his visit.
 
JustGeorge

JustGeorge

Not As Much Fun As I Look
Staff member
Premium Member
sun rise said:
Since this is an interfaith discussion and not a joke thread, Shiva is offering to visit you for no charge. It may be a costly visit given His destructive tendencies which is why there's no up front charge for his visit.
Click to expand...

Wonderful! He'll fit in so well here!
 
ChristineM

ChristineM

"Be strong", I whispered to my coffee.
Premium Member
JustGeorge said:
Sell me a God(or Goddess)!
Click to expand...

You my dear are totally in need of this goddess of unmatched ability, she is also flexible goddess and is considering taking on yet another asset with the additional responsibilities that includes.

For Anoia is a unique goddess (sorry but its true and must be said), she alone of all the gods and goddesses takes care of things that get stuck in drawers. Truly a goddess that everyone needs from time to time

And what is the price for this unique goddess? To you my dear, extremely affordable, in fact even the most destitute of people, so long as they own just one draw, may sing out the incantation to Anoia...

"How can it close on the damned thing but not open with it? Who bought this? Do we ever use it?"

So you don't need to ask the cost, Anoia comes at no cost to you other than a few simple words

And now let us speak of flexibility, Anoia will also find objects that roll under other objects and things stuck in sofa cushions, if asked with the correct amount of pleading in the appropriate incantation.

She is also considering handling stuck zippers.

BTW, she eats corkscrews.

Anoia - Discworld & Terry Pratchett Wiki
 
Last edited:
JustGeorge

JustGeorge

Not As Much Fun As I Look
Staff member
Premium Member
ChristineM said:
You my dear are totally in need of this goddess of unmatched ability, she is also flexible goddess and is considering taking on yet another asset with the additional responsibilities that includes.

For Anoia is a unique goddess (sorry but its true and must be said), she alone of all the gods and goddesses takes care of things that get stuck in drawers. Truly a goddess that everyone needs from time to time

And what is the price for this unique goddess? Extremely affordable, in fact even the most destitute of people, so long as they own just one draw, may sing out the incantation to Anoia...

"How can it close on the damned thing but not open with it? Who bought this? Do we ever use it?"

So you don't need to ask the cost, Anoia comes at not cost to you other than a few simple words

And now let us speak of flexibility, Anoia will also find objects that roll under other objects and things stuck in sofa cushions, if asked with the correct amount of pleading in the appropriate incantation.

She is also considering handling stuck zippers.

BTW, she eats corkscrews.

Anoia - Discworld & Terry Pratchett Wiki
Click to expand...

SOLD!

That little drawer in the corner is always getting stuck!

You'd think I'd learn and quite over packing it... but I don't.

It would be nice to have Anoia around. :)
 
Brickjectivity

Brickjectivity

wind and rain touch not this brain
Staff member
Premium Member
JustGeorge said:
I'm bored, so I thought of creating a game...

Sell me a God(or Goddess)! Explain to us why you think this God/dess should get our attention, and why we should all include them in our life.

A catch is you may not use any sales tactics that involve downgrading other Gods. Saying "because he/she is the only or best would bring other deities into it, and that's not allowed here. Also, think carefully before giving a title... "creator deity" or "goddess of love" is only relative to one system, so it may not be very convincing(there are many creators and deities of love out there).

Anyone can play, and the deity you choose to 'sell' doesn't have to be yours. You may not sell lifestyles, worldviews, prophets, or gurus. Just deities. :)
Click to expand...
Arg!!!!

Ok. George. I'll play. I'm going to sell you on serving our Lard Eon Must. Are Lard is a good Lard. Our Lard is your lard, too, if you will have it. Will you serve it? It is terrific in pie.
 
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