Rapists and free will?

[Spiderman]

Obviously a person who raped someone is choosing to do so.

Yet there are very few female rapists, or female Ted Bundys out there.

So, if Bundy had been born with a Vagina, I doubt he would have raped and murdered anyone, because statistics show that having a Vagina (instead of a penis), greatly decreases the likelihood of raping or murdering people (especially for the sexual gratification being the motive behind it).

So, with that in mind, how we exercise our free will, especially regarding rape, (and temptations to do so) depends largely on what is out of our control, our genitals, as well as the gender on your birth certificate!

So, if being born male greatly GREATLY increases your likelihood of being a rapist by Far, can we actually blame it on "free will"??

Also, for me, despite having sadistic fantasies of violently ravaging, owning, and controlling girls when I was a child, I never actually wanted to act them out. It was largely caused by being exposed to porn at age 8, because prior to that, it was NOT an issue.

But I have been in a youth prison for other offenses, and I had a cell-mate who raped and drowned a girl in the hungry horse river in Montana.

The kid had evil eyes, weird posture, weird sinister voice, and showed no signs of having a moral compass!

For many other criminals observed with those tendencies, I get the impression there is NOTHING they can do to help themselves!

They are severely troubled and disturbed, with chronic temptations to violate people sexually. Can we actually say, they are to blame for having those chronic urges??

As I said, were they born female, they probably wouldn't have them. (Actually, I am shocked with how many females I have heard say they have fantasies of being handcuffed, bound, gagged, and violently manhandled, strangled, raped, and beaten! . I have never known a man share such fantasies. Which is not healthy I'm assuming, but harmless, not the norm, and totally the opposite of what I'm talking about).

For me, I needed fantasies of aggression, controlling, dominating, and exercising ownership to get excited or off, destroy something beautiful I guess, watch a fire get out of control, but never actually wanted to have it manifest outside of fantasy.

And I don't even look at porn anymore, and haven't yanked one out in over three weeks Woot! WOOT! To keep purity of soul! (Sometimes if the tension builds though, the lesser of two evils is to yank one out if you are celibate!)

Obviously, for some individuals, they feel like they have to act such fantasies out in order to experience Heaven on earth , in the sense that it is their greatest joy, delight, and satisfaction!

For other men, it isn't even a temptation. People that do those acts are sick, warped, tortured individuals!

Are men with these inclinations, really at fault for being drawn (tempted, desires to ravage) to commit those acts??

EDIT:
Acting these desires out is the absolute most cowardly, terrible thing a man can do, but is he at fault for wanting to do so in the first place??

 

[VoidCat]

It is their fault. No one told them to rape.

 

[Spiderman]

It is their fault. No one told them to rape.

What does that have to do with what I said?

I said, are they at fault for having the inclinations, being drawn to commit those acts?

Obviously if they rape, they are at fault.

But that wasn't my question.

 

[Kooky]

The "temptation" to rape women is a story men come up with to justify their decisions to rape a woman. It allows them to point to something outside of their control that "made" them do the deed, to shift the blame outside their own conscious acts and their own conscious will to engage in these acts, onto a nebulous concept of "nature" or "desire" that made them powerless in their own body.

It is a particulary insiduous method to reverse victim and prepetrator - shifting the blame onto their victim, whose looks and acts made them victimize these women, made them perpetrate a violent and disgusting crime.

"Inclinations" are another story, one we tell ourselves as a society at large, to absolve ourselves from the fact that criminal behavior is a function of social environment, and that rape is to a large degree a particularly nasty symptom of a toxic relationship towards gender and sexuality.

 

[VoidCat]

What does that have to do with what I said?

I said, are they at fault for having the inclinations, being drawn to commit those acts?

Obviously if they rape, they are at fault.

But that wasn't my question.

Ah misread the question

 

[Spiderman]

Also, I have learned how to associate sexual gratification with fantasies of doing no harm to others, and change the habit completely, into thoughts of doing good deeds for my Queen of Heaven, and praying for her exaltation as I climax, to turn it into an offering, a game someone else can enjoy, not merely just self gratification. An act of love and devotion. The Catholic church already calls acts of short love to God or the Saints "Spiritual ejaculation!"

It actually completely revolutionized my sexuality. I'm totally not even remotely close to being a sadist and am deeply compassionate these days.

All thanks be to my lady friends in Heaven!

But best to keep masturbation to a minimum , and have purity of thoughts and innocence. I mentioned elsewhere, excessive masturbation causes earthquakes in third world countries!

All things in moderation! Especially that!

 

[Spiderman]

The "temptation" to rape women is a story men come up with to justify their decisions to rape a woman. It allows them to point to something outside of their control that "made" them do the deed, to shift the blame outside their own conscious acts and their own conscious will to engage in these acts, onto a nebulous concept of "nature" or "desire" that made them powerless in their own body.

It is a particulary insiduous method to reverse victim and prepetrator - shifting the blame onto their victim, whose looks and acts made them victimize these women, made them perpetrate a violent and disgusting crime.

"Inclinations" are another story, one we tell ourselves as a society at large, to absolve ourselves from the fact that criminal behavior is a function of social environment, and that rape is to a large degree a particularly nasty symptom of a toxic relationship towards gender and sexuality.

Some people are always afflicted with strong desires to do bad behavior that other people don't even desire to do.

It is just a fact! How could one argue otherwise??

And no, a victim in such a circumstance is absolutely never to blame, and I think women with masochist fantasies are not the norm. I just said I met them.

 

[VoidCat]

My thoughts: everything you wrote here shows just how rape culture operates. Men are taught to be violent, that sex is owed to them, and that women's bodies exist just to please them and women are taught purity culture, are blamed and taught to protect themselves. Really society needs a lot of work. Boys will be boys they say if a boy tries to touch a girl without her consent rather then teaching the boy it's wrong.

 

[Spiderman]

My thoughts: everything you wrote here shows just how rape culture operates. Men are taught to be violent, that sex is owed to them, and that women's bodies exist just to please them and women are taught purity culture, are blamed and taught to protect themselves. Really society needs a lot of work. Boys will be boys they say if a boy tries to touch a girl without her consent rather then teaching the boy it's wrong.

And pornography , hardcore porn, I was exposed to it as a prepubescent child , and it sends such toxic message that women can be objectified.

The body is beautiful! By all means, images of nude women should not be banned. That is sacred stuff.

But so much porn is extremely degrading to women. It's just toxic to be delighting in it, ESPECIALLY as a child with a developing brain, that cannot respond maturely to it.

 

[Spiderman]

My thoughts: everything you wrote here shows just how rape culture operates. Men are taught to be violent, that sex is owed to them, and that women's bodies exist just to please them and women are taught purity culture, are blamed and taught to protect themselves. Really society needs a lot of work. Boys will be boys they say if a boy tries to touch a girl without her consent rather then teaching the boy it's wrong.

But I have never thought sex was owed to me, and never actually thought the female body was just to please me .

I said I had very warped fantasies that I didn't used to have, immediately take place after exposure to porn.

 

[Aupmanyav]

Spiderman's question, as I understand it, why such tendencies are their in minds of men and women? Who puts them there? Why everyone is not pure and spiritual, or at least law-abiding? After all, we were created in the image of God? Is that true, Spiderman? And why not humans are disgusted by porn on internet?

 

[Spiderman]

Spiderman's question, as I understand it, why such tendencies are their in minds of men and women? Who puts them there? Why everyone is not pure and spiritual, or at least law-abiding? Is that true, Spiderman?

All of those were what I was wondering when I made the OP, yes.

 

[VoidCat]

My thoughts: everything you wrote here shows just how rape culture operates. Men are taught to be violent, that sex is owed to them, and that women's bodies exist just to please them and women are taught purity culture, are blamed and taught to protect themselves. Really society needs a lot of work. Boys will be boys they say if a boy tries to touch a girl without her consent rather then teaching the boy it's wrong.

Ill add im nonbinary. I've been mistaken as both male and female. I've seen the difference folk treat men and folk treat women. I know how men talk and act among one another when females aren't around...and it's not always good. Men can be such pigs around each other.

And pornography , hardcore porn, I was exposed to it as a prepubescent child , and it sends such toxic message that women can be objectified.

The body is beautiful! By all means, images of nude women should not be banned. That is sacred stuff.

But so much porn is extremely degrading to women. It's just toxic to be delighting in it, ESPECIALLY as a child with a developing brain, that cannot respond maturely to it.

No comment here. I don't have a solid opinion.

But I have never thought sex was owed to me, and never actually thought the female body was just to please me .

I said I had very warped fantasies that I didn't used to have, immediately take place after exposure to porn.

That's your experience. But you ain't met the kind of folk I have I guess cuz there definitely guys out there who think that...heck there are guys who think just cuz some woman is wearing makeup it's just to attract men. No ***** the gal is wearing makeup cuz they want to

One more thing to note: on rape fanasties and females. I may be nonbinary but I've had a few of those where I am being raped. I believe this is because of a lot of negative views on sex and cuz rape is constantly something i was warned about as a kid. Literally sex was taught to me to be something disgusting and that's all men want. I honestly can't imagine having sex with someone and it be gentle. Sex absolutely terrifies me because one, im asexual and two, ideas that I don't agree with but was taught and it's programmed into my head. I can't speak for everyone but rape fantasies may be a sign of how poorly sex is treated and talked about especially towards women.

 

[Kooky]

I think it's also worth pointing out that not everyone wants all of their sexual fantasies to become reality.

EDIT: In particular, a fantasy is something that exists inside my own mind, i.e. in a space where I have all the power and can control where things are going and how they are going to pan out.

This is patently untrue when we're talking about the physical world outside our heads, where a lot of the things we imagine as awesome and exciting may shape up to be anything but.

 

[VoidCat]

I think it's also worth pointing out that not everyone wants all of their sexual fantasies to become reality.

I dont
Especially my rape fanasties.

 

[Spiderman]

Ill add im nonbinary. I've been mistaken as both male and female. I've seen the difference folk treat men and folk treat women. I know how men talk and act among one another when females aren't around...and it's not always good. Men can be such pigs around each other.


No comment here. I don't have a solid opinion.


That's your experience. But you ain't met the kind of folk I have I guess cuz there definitely guys out there who think that...heck there are guys who think just cuz some woman is wearing makeup it's just to attract men. No ***** the gal is wearing makeup cuz they want to

One more thing to note: on rape fanasties and females. I may be nonbinary but I've had a few of those where I am being raped. I believe this is because of a lot of negative views on sex and cuz rape is constantly something i was warned about as a kid. Literally sex was taught to me to be something disgusting and that's all men want. I honestly can't imagine having sex with someone and it be gentle. Sex absolutely terrifies me because one, im asexual and two, ideas that I don't agree with but was taught and it's programmed into my head. I can't speak for everyone but rape fantasies may be a sign of how poorly sex is treated and talked about especially towards women.

I have met plenty rapists and men who treat women as objects. Not sure what would lead you to think otherwise, when I made it clear in the OP that I met more of such people before age 18, then most (I assume) will meet in their whole life.

I'm simply saying, I didn't believe the female body was there just for my own gratification, but my fantasies were warped, following early exposure to porn, where the female body is degraded and objectified!

 

[Spiderman]

I think it's also worth pointing out that not everyone wants all of their sexual fantasies to become reality.

EDIT: In particular, a fantasy is something that exists inside my own mind, i.e. in a space where I have all the power and can control where things are going and how they are going to pan out.

This is patently untrue when we're talking about the physical world outside our heads, where a lot of the things we imagine as awesome and exciting may shape up to be anything but.

Cant argue with that.

 

[VoidCat]

I have met plenty rapists and men who treat women as objects. Not sure what would lead you to think otherwise, when I made it clear in the OP that I met more of such people before age 18, then most (I assume) will meet in their whole life.

I'm simply saying, I didn't believe the female body was there just for my own gratification, but my fantasies were warped, following early exposure to porn, where the female body is degraded and objectified!

Of course. Perhaps porn plays a role in many cases I don't know. I just don't have a solid opinion cuz I don't have much experience with porn.

 

[VoidCat]

Not sure what would lead you to think otherwise, when I made it clear in the OP that I met more of such people before age 18, then most (I assume) will meet in their whole life.

Honest? I skimmed the OP and reread it a few times trying to absorb it but my mind can't focus.
So bits of it kinda fell wayside

 

[Spiderman]

Honest? I skimmed the OP and reread it a few times trying to absorb it but my mind can't focus.
So bits of it kinda fell wayside

It's okay. It happens.

I just think you misinterpreted the message. No harm done.