I do respect the desire to not have sex until marriage, and if I was in a relationship with someone of that mindset I would abstain with them if that's what made them comfortable...but I do think it gives many people overblown expectations of what marital sex is like. I know in my church they made it sound like married couples who waited have almost mystically amazing super-sex, like it's this heightened experience totally different from the kind outside of marriage. I've known two different married couples where both partners decided after marriage that if they'd known earlier everything they know now about sex, they wouldn't have waited. The reality didn't match the images and feelings they were taught about it, and when they learned what it was really like they figured the abstinence thing wasn't as big a deal as they'd thought.
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Premarital Sex?
- Thread starter Sunstone
- Start date
How exactly does premarital sex "squander our soul"?
So you think He was misquoted?
Matthew 5:33-36:
Smoke
Done here.
If you're trying to tell people that they must go through a prolonged waiting period followed by a special ceremony before they can eat, and then they have to eat the same meal for the rest of their lives, you have to try to convince them (and they have to try to convince themselves) that it's the very best meal in the world.
Reminds me of the old Mary Tyler Moore show, when Phyllis explained sex to her daughter, how it was a beautiful, spiritual experience. She told Mary, "I made it sound ... almost real."
Mercy Not Sacrifice
Well-Known Member
If you're trying to tell people that they must go through a prolonged waiting period followed by a special ceremony before they can eat, and then they have to eat the same meal for the rest of their lives, you have to try to convince them (and they have to try to convince themselves) that it's the very best meal in the world.
Reminds me of the old Mary Tyler Moore show, when Phyllis explained sex to her daughter, how it was a beautiful, spiritual experience. She told Mary, "I made it sound ... almost real."
I can make sex sound almost real.
Quoth The Raven
Half Arsed Muse
Around 50% of post marital sex is also performed what turns out to be outside of a complete and total, lifelong and unbreakable bond of marriage. Stop getting married you people, you're cheapening the sex.:149:
Quoth The Raven
Half Arsed Muse
No, the fact the other person has proven their trustworthyness should establish that trust. If you can't truly trust someone based on themselves, then a wedding vow shouldn't - and probably wont - make them suddenly the most rustworthy person in your life.
I imagine there are a slew of people out there who have had a spouse shag the neighbour who would agree.
Hope
Princesinha
This merely proves exactly what I said earlier about people not taking promises, or vows, seriously enough anymore. It says nothing about vows, and everything about people and their selfishness.
As I said, vows are "meant to provide trust." Obviously, because people no longer take vows seriously, this doesn't happen as it should. I say it's better not to marry at all if you know you can't keep a promise and aren't prepared for self-sacrificing, committed love. Because that's what marriage is all about.
So the billions of people on this planet who are not Christian and who do not strive to be perfect "as our heavenly Father is perfect" are demeaned as human beings?
I'll let you be the one to break the news to them.
Smoke
Done here.
Actually, so are the Christians. Jesus never said to strive to be perfect. He said to be perfect. If you're trying but not making it, you're ... not making it.
Shadow Wolf
Certified People sTabber
Also there are social stigmas tied in with unmarried couples living together. I think it's Florida, I am probably wrong though, but it some state it is illegal for an unmarried male and female that are not related to live together. I highly doubt it is enforced, but the law is in the books. Also, there are actually quite a few people who get married just for sex.
shadow_fire
Member
Teens should be given and taught the importance of Condoms. I know I've had sex, and I'm 16. Luckily I'm educated enough to of used a condom. But I fear for others who are (from a religious influence) not taught how and to use condoms.
Shadow Wolf
Certified People sTabber
I fear even more for those who are taught condoms are virtually useless in preventing pregnancies and the spreading of STD's.
Mercy Not Sacrifice
Well-Known Member
Yeah. And some of them are probably some of your peers...
Scott1
Well-Known Member
Smoke
Done here.
The gross irresponsibility and dishonesty of adults acting in the name of God should never be underestimated.
That position seems absurd. On what grounds can it be reasonably asserted that anyone who is not a Christian is demeaned?
If you find that offensive, you should have heard what I was thinking.
Scott1
Well-Known Member
No.... to be specific, it includes Christians and non alike... I view this subject in an anthropological sense... we can leave faith references out and I'd still believe we as human beings should strive for the beauty of perfection.
I don't believe I've even been rude to you..????.. or this kind of off topic attack a new Admin thing? Oh well... PM me if you'd like to elaborate on your offensive thoughts.
Peace be with you,
Scott
tcprowling
Junior Member
Does the Commandment " Thou shalt not commit and adultery" restrict or forbid sex outside the bounds of marriage?
For that matter what does that commandment cover? or do we just make our own arrangements with that?
For that matter what does that commandment cover? or do we just make our own arrangements with that?
Shadow Wolf
Certified People sTabber
Can perfection ever be achieved though? Can you even define perfection, in a non religious since?
And I fail to see how waiting until marriage makes it 'perfect' since marriage is artificial.
Not to mention the whole idea of archetypes or "perfection", which, IMO, is also artificial.