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Poetry Contest! Win A Prize!

Discussion in 'Games / Pics / Jokes / Stories' started by Revoltingest, May 13, 2019.

  1. Revoltingest

    Revoltingest Greased up & ready for action!
    Premium Member

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    Bokononism
    Submit your poetry, & at the end of the day, I'll pick a winner.
    First prize is having me come to your house to rake up your leaves.
    Second prize is a picture of me topless.

    The rules:
    1) Any mention of Trump, Hitler, AOC, or Hillary is an immediate disqualifier.
    2) Something somewhere must rhyme.
    3) See #1
     
    • Winner Winner x 1
  2. Subduction Zone

    Subduction Zone Veteran Member

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    Atheist
    There once was a man from . . .

    Oh wait! Is this supposed to be An original work?
     
  3. Brickjectivity

    Brickjectivity Veteran Member
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    Liberal Christian
    Bieber, Bieber, burning bright
    in Walt Disney's pallid light
    such a man as he drew nigh
    propped thy fame up to the sky
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Funny Funny x 1
  4. Quagmire

    Quagmire Imaginary talking monkey
    Staff Member Premium Member

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    Religion:
    I am not an athiest.
    Trump, Hitler, AOC, and Hillary walk into a bar . . .


    Oh wait, you said poetry.
     
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Winner Winner x 1
  5. Father Heathen

    Father Heathen Veteran Member

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    the art of poetry I tried to master
    attempted to reach down into my soul
    but instead I reached up into a hole
    and pulled out this disaster
     
    • Funny Funny x 4
    • Like Like x 1
  6. Rival

    Rival Noachide
    Staff Member Premium Member

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    Religion:
    בת נח
    I went from nowhere to somewhere,
    From being no-one to someone,
    But I did not like going from here to there,
    Because I did not like who I had become.
    So I returned from somewhere to nowhere,
    Back the the place where I belong,
    Where I could look into the water and stare,
    Reflecting on everything I had once done.
    Perhaps it was better to be nowhere,
    And to have somewhere to go,
    Than already to be somewhere,
    A person I no longer know.
     
    #6 Rival, May 13, 2019
    Last edited: May 13, 2019
    • Like Like x 3
    • Winner Winner x 2
  7. AT-AT

    AT-AT Well-Known Member

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    Religion:
    I finally figured out what direction I should go, when I studied the revelations of the Baha'i faith
    Pigs, pigs!
    Covered in chocolate!
    Falling from the sky!
    They were deceived
    That the chocolate was lovely mud
    And they rolled in it
    Why, what does that make'em?
    Oh, lovely chocolate covered bacon!
     
    • Like Like x 3
  8. Sky Rivers

    Sky Rivers Active Member

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    Religion:
    Christian
    Yesterday is complete
    The memory fades with time
    This should be a crime
    To forget yet be replete.

    Today is an unfinished work
    A painting missing details
    The ocean lacking seashells
    No crevices sketched for creatures to lurk.

    Tomorrow hasn't arrived
    It's next sunrise
    It's a surprise
    Will it be survived?

    What about destiny?
    Is there more to see?
    Will it impact you or me?

    As for me?
    I'll remain by this big tree
    With its roots in Hell... see?
    ...and its boughs reaching up into the sea.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  9. shmogie

    shmogie Well-Known Member
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    I live in the Sanoran desert, no leaves, will you seek out and destroy scorpions instead, if I win ?
     
  10. shmogie

    shmogie Well-Known Member
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    The life of a toad is not good,
    They live in a peculiar hood,
    here they live underground for nine months of the year,
    but in the summer they make such a racket you hear,numbed,you just reach for another beer,
    Enough beer and you scream at the ol¨ toad,
    He looks at you and says, we were here long before you, hit the road.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  11. ChristineM

    ChristineM "Be strong" I whispered to my coffee.
    Premium Member

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    Sparkle sparkle little twink
    Who the hell i am i think
    I am not intoxicated with alcohump
    All though some thinkle peep i am.


    No prize please, we have no lawn and i object to the objectification of men. Although you could perhaps give the kids a dollar each, there's ten thousand of them
     
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Like Like x 1
  12. Wu Wei

    Wu Wei ursus senum severiorum and ex-Bisy Backson

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    Hitler and Hillary sittin' in a tree
    Trump shows up with AOC
     
    • Funny Funny x 3
    • Like Like x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
  13. Orbit

    Orbit I'm a planet

    Joined:
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    Religion:
    Dinner
    Bacon, Bacon burning bright
    Cover Revoltingest this good night
    Wrap him, wrap him snuggled tight
    I'll make sure he doesn't fight.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  14. Polymath257

    Polymath257 Think & Care
    Staff Member Premium Member

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    Religion:
    Non-theist
    Sex is good
    Sex is great
    It's not just to pro-create.

    (previously posted in another thread).
     
    • Funny Funny x 2
    • Like Like x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
  15. Zita

    Zita Solitary Eclectic Witch

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2019
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    +96
    Religion:
    Witchcraft
    Everyone is related you see,for there's more to you and me.
    Some call our Creator" God,"some call him "thee".
    I call the Creator"My Higher Power",that's what works for me.
    For I feel hatred ,no longer should be,for Love is the ultimate Key,
    and it has no price or fee.
    We need to come together and be as we were meant to be
    happy ,loving and carefree,it's as easy as ABC's or counting one to three.;
    It's like planting a little seed and feeding it the nourishment it needs.
    A force that is strong, for we've been divided too long.How many will
    agree?That this is the life we need and it would be better for all eternity.
     
  16. Brickjectivity

    Brickjectivity Veteran Member
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    Liberal Christian
    I have no leaves, no leaves to rake,
    because my trees they are all fake
    my trees are fake because my soil
    is actually some engine oil
     
    • Like Like x 2
  17. Dan From Smithville

    Dan From Smithville Well-Known Member
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    Methodist
    Here is my first entry. I believe I have included all the things you said not to include. With a twist.


    Hillary

    Hillary

    Hillary Swank.

    On your acting

    We could always bank.

    But lately you've been in a slump.

    What has been your acting trump?

    Would a sure thing hit

    Lure you back

    An Oscar-worthy Character

    In a roll you can attack.

    Hillary

    Hillary

    Hillary Swank
     
    • Like Like x 2
  18. Quagmire

    Quagmire Imaginary talking monkey
    Staff Member Premium Member

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    Religion:
    I am not an athiest.
    In the beginning, a long time ago,
    Before there was anything, everyone knows,
    There was nothing but nothing, Yes nothing at all,

    No big and no little,
    No short and no tall,
    No good and no evil,
    No left and no right,

    'Til one day a voice shouted, "LET THERE BE LIGHT"!
    And then there was light for the whole world to be lit,

    And there was still nothing there,
    But at least you could see it.
     
    #18 Quagmire, May 13, 2019
    Last edited: May 13, 2019
    • Like Like x 2
  19. Brickjectivity

    Brickjectivity Veteran Member
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    Liberal Christian
    hes smitten
    by this person
    who's an organ
    playing baboon
    about thirty
    such a birdy
    dropping turdy
    hurdy gurdy
     
    • Like Like x 1
  20. AT-AT

    AT-AT Well-Known Member

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    Religion:
    I finally figured out what direction I should go, when I studied the revelations of the Baha'i faith
    Not sure why I read that in a Lil Wayne voice. :)
     
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