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Our own actions define who we are

Discussion in 'General Debates' started by We Never Know, Apr 20, 2021.

  1. We Never Know

    We Never Know Well-Known Member

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    I don't like or dislike...or agree or disagree with anyone based upon....

    -their belief or lack of belief
    -their race
    -their political affiliations
    -their opinions
    -their job
    -their wealth
    -their stature
    -their friends
    -etc.

    I simply look at the person for "who" they are and how they are. The above list of garbage is of no matter to me. Be a good person and I will treat you as a good person and I expect the same.

    Who we really are is reflected in everything we do. We can hide, lie, even deny but who we truly are is reflected in our actions.

    Wouldn't it be nice if that's how the world and everyone viewed each other.
     
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  2. anna b.

    anna b. Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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    You don't agree or disagree with anyone based on their opinions? How is that possible?

    I can see not basing liking or not liking, but agreeing or disagreeing? I don't see that.
     
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  3. We Never Know

    We Never Know Well-Known Member

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    Everyone is entitled to their opinion. It doesn't make them right or wrong. Its simply an opinion.
    If your opinion is red is prettier than blue why would I disagree with you. You are telling me how you see things.
     
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  4. Left Coast

    Left Coast Happy Spring!
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    I agree with you somewhat, although I would definitely disagree with people on their beliefs or political affiliations if the situation calls for it. Political (and religious) affiliations and acts are acts that define us like any other.

    I would also disagree with people on their choice of friends if their friends were engaged in unethical or dangerous behavior and I felt it was influencing or endangering that person.
     
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  5. We Never Know

    We Never Know Well-Known Member

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    Disapprove is not the same as disagree.
    For example I my disapprove of someone doing something but may not disagree if they think its good or best for them. They will figure it out.

    I may disapprove of Trump or Biden but I wont disagree if someone else likes them. That's their choice.
     
  6. anna b.

    anna b. Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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    The opinions people argue about are more complicated than red vs. blue. What if I gave my opinion that Trump won the election in a landslide but the deep state sabotaged the ballot counts, so he's been meeting with top U.S. military leaders at Mar-a-Lago to plan a May Day coup and his friend Putin has promised to fly in shock troops to assist?

    Would such an opinion be right or wrong? I understand they have the 'right' to be 'wrong,' but it's possible for you to agree or disagree with their opinion without maligning their person.
     
  7. We Never Know

    We Never Know Well-Known Member

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    If that's what they feel who am I to tell them what they feel is wrong? They will figure it out without me telling them they are wrong and that they should see things differently.
    The more you try to control someone the more they may stray.
     
  8. Unveiled Artist

    Unveiled Artist You are safe

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    I think of it more:

    I disagree with your religion but if it makes you a good person, I have no problems.

    I dislike your politic views but if they are helping the economy and not tearing it apart, I don't have problems.

    I disagree with how you make a living but if it's helping you take care your family, I have problems.

    I disagree with having too much wealth but if you're using it responsibility (by your criteria not mine), I have no issues.

    I don't like your friend but I will support you as a friend if you two decide to marry. It's not about me.

    You can disagree, dislike, disaprove and it shouldn't be a problem if we don't set up a criteria for someone else to live from or disregard them if they don't.
     
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  9. anna b.

    anna b. Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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    Maybe I'm not saying this well. Let me try again.

    You can say you disagree with someone by expressing that you disagree, and then why. You don't have to tell them "what they feel is wrong and that they should see things differently."

    In my scenario, if I was trying to be my best self (not always possible, of course, I'm not a saint), then I might say something like "I disagree with you on that, let me explain why. This is what I think/believe...."
     
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  10. We Never Know

    We Never Know Well-Known Member

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    You can disapprove without disagreeing.
     
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  11. JustGeorge

    JustGeorge Well-Known Member
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    I will befriend anybody, regardless of their opinions. If someone is doing things I find questionable or dislike, I will not necessarily declare that we cannot be friends, but I may limit the time I spend with them, or how close I let them in(for example, I may not refuse to talk to a thief, but I probably won't invite them in).

    The exception I make are people that are deliberately cruel. I'm not talking about a situation where Joe Blow gets angry and hits somebody. I'm talking about the turds that genuinely seem to enjoy the discomfort of others. And I don't care how subtle it is. If you like watching others suffer, I don't like you.

    I do find it harder to communicate with some people. I struggle with 'pleasantries'. I don't like fake smiles and "how's the weather" kind of stuff. Its just hard for me. Sometimes I suspect that, like my sons, I may be on the a bit on the spectrum myself, though perhaps much more mildly.
     
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  12. anna b.

    anna b. Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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    I see disagreement as directed at the argument.

    I see disapproval as directed at the person.

    I'd rather disagree than disapprove.
     
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  13. We Never Know

    We Never Know Well-Known Member

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    In many cases if you disapprove they will at least think about it. In many cases if you disagree they don't care.
     
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  14. Isolde Schulz

    Isolde Schulz Member

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    Disagreeing in most constraining of environments leads often to ostrasising even when unjust. Suppose we were happy with that sort of existence, that would make us masochist.
     
  15. anna b.

    anna b. Tried and waited then got tired, that's about it

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    Perhaps we can agree to disagree. :)
     
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  16. stvdv

    stvdv Veteran Member

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    Ditto
     
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  17. stvdv

    stvdv Veteran Member

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    Much less drama

    So "less nice" for all the drama queens

    But "more nice" for me
     
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  18. We Never Know

    We Never Know Well-Known Member

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    In my experiences most people who look for or cause drama are miserable in their own life. If they can find or create enough drama elsewhere, it drowns out their own drama in their life. But that is my opinion.
     
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  19. stvdv

    stvdv Veteran Member

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    Thanks, makes sense

    I do have plenty challenges in my life, and I am busy solving my own 'stuff', so I don't have even time to create more drama

    Those people that do, usually lack introspection or their own drama is too painful to handle I think
     
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  20. We Never Know

    We Never Know Well-Known Member

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    I offer this.....

    IMG_20210421_001714.jpg
     
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