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Online dating?

Riders

Well-Known Member
I had thought maybe if I were willing to pay for online dating maybe there might be a higher quality of folks and less scam artists. Anyone want to put their dating app names here? I won't do it unless I can use my check to pay.

Ok Cupid, I'm through with it, it's crawling with scam artists.
 

Mindmaster

Well-Known Member
Premium Member
I had thought maybe if I were willing to pay for online dating maybe there might be a higher quality of folks and less scam artists. Anyone want to put their dating app names here? I won't do it unless I can use my check to pay.

Ok Cupid, I'm through with it, it's crawling with scam artists.

It's not a platform problem, so much as the dating pool. But, let me explain... then you can figure out if you agree or not.

So, here's the deal... People who are into making families and getting together start shopping from like 18+ and by about age 35 all the good candidates are taken. If these people stay married past 35-40 they're probably going to be married until they die. So, what you have predominately on those sites 35+ are people cheating on their spouses, unexpected widowers, and divorcees. You obviously don't want to deal with the cheaters, and the others come with a lot of baggage you either want to deal with or not. Personally, I think these dating sites are worthless and only those with the least appeal will be there. (The people with social skills will just find their dates the old-fashioned way.)

In any case, I don't see how spending money will solve that problem. The better option is to find things you enjoy doing that involve other folks and bump into them the normal way, lol.
 

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
Years ago I used Mate1 when women could use it with a free account. It's gone bad now (or I just getting older) but I met my first former girlfriend and so far right now a roughly 17 year friendship.
 

Riders

Well-Known Member
It's not a platform problem, so much as the dating pool. But, let me explain... then you can figure out if you agree or not.

So, here's the deal... People who are into making families and getting together start shopping from like 18+ and by about age 35 all the good candidates are taken. If these people stay married past 35-40 they're probably going to be married until they die. So, what you have predominately on those sites 35+ are people cheating on their spouses, unexpected widowers, and divorcees. You obviously don't want to deal with the cheaters, and the others come with a lot of baggage you either want to deal with or not. Personally, I think these dating sites are worthless and only those with the least appeal will be there. (The people with social skills will just find their dates the old-fashioned way.)

In any case, I don't see how spending money will solve that problem. The better option is to find things you enjoy doing that involve other folks and bump into them the normal way, lol.

Thanks for the info plus married men who like and scam artists.
 

Stevicus

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
It's not a platform problem, so much as the dating pool. But, let me explain... then you can figure out if you agree or not.

So, here's the deal... People who are into making families and getting together start shopping from like 18+ and by about age 35 all the good candidates are taken. If these people stay married past 35-40 they're probably going to be married until they die. So, what you have predominately on those sites 35+ are people cheating on their spouses, unexpected widowers, and divorcees. You obviously don't want to deal with the cheaters, and the others come with a lot of baggage you either want to deal with or not. Personally, I think these dating sites are worthless and only those with the least appeal will be there. (The people with social skills will just find their dates the old-fashioned way.)

In any case, I don't see how spending money will solve that problem. The better option is to find things you enjoy doing that involve other folks and bump into them the normal way, lol.

I haven't really dabbled in online dating for more than a decade, but from what i understand, it's gotten even worse. I just prefer meeting people the old fashioned way.

Besides, as a man, I get the sense that a lot of the other men on these sites are as the OP describes: A plethora of bums, crazies, pervs, scammers, and all around low-lives. But not all of them, but those of halfway decent quality might not necessarily want to be associated with or lumped into a group like that.

And men also have good reason to be wary on those dating sites as well. There are all kinds of pitfalls on the internet.
 

Brickjectivity

wind and rain touch not this brain
Staff member
Premium Member
I met my wife on AOL chat about 21 years ago.
Are you telling me....that AOL was a force for good in your life? That's terrific!

I judged them too harshly for trying to control how people surfed. I did not approve of that. I felt like they took internet access and made it feel like an app and didn't let you leave AOL very easily. I never signed up, because I thought it would be like wearing horse blinders. I never even game them a chance.
 

Riders

Well-Known Member
I haven't really dabbled in online dating for more than a decade, but from what i understand, it's gotten even worse. I just prefer meeting people the old fashioned way.

Besides, as a man, I get the sense that a lot of the other men on these sites are as the OP describes: A plethora of bums, crazies, pervs, scammers, and all around low-lives. But not all of them, but those of halfway decent quality might not necessarily want to be associated with or lumped into a group like that.

And men also have good reason to be wary on those dating sites as well. There are all kinds of pitfalls on the internet.

There is a lot of prostitutes who target older men, especially young prostitutes on the dating sights now.
 

McBell

Resident Sourpuss
Are you telling me....that AOL was a force for good in your life? That's terrific!

I judged them too harshly for trying to control how people surfed. I did not approve of that. I felt like they took internet access and made it feel like an app and didn't let you leave AOL very easily. I never signed up, because I thought it would be like wearing horse blinders. I never even game them a chance.
I was actually in the chat room to tell my friends that I was uninstalling AOL and giving them alternate means of keeping in touch when my now wife started chatting me up.

I am a gamer, even more so back then, and AOL was a major resource hog.

And you are right, it was a major pain in the *** canceling the subscription.

I had to cancel that card and get a new one to stop the charges.
 

ChristineM

"Be strong", I whispered to my coffee.
Premium Member
I had thought maybe if I were willing to pay for online dating maybe there might be a higher quality of folks and less scam artists. Anyone want to put their dating app names here? I won't do it unless I can use my check to pay.

Ok Cupid, I'm through with it, it's crawling with scam artists.


M brother in law has been using online dating on and off for some years. He signs up to one or two then drops them whenever someone tries to scam him which is often.
 

Mindmaster

Well-Known Member
Premium Member
And men also have good reason to be wary on those dating sites as well. There are all kinds of pitfalls on the internet.

Nearly all of the women on those sites are just using at a side hustle. This isn't the way to find your next keeper regardless of the sex you're interested in. They're little more than prostitutes by proxy for the most part, and they are only there to trade sex for cash money. I don't think anyone here needs another hole in their wallet, lol.
 

Mindmaster

Well-Known Member
Premium Member
Thanks for the info plus married men who like and scam artists.

Most of the more appealing candidates (of either sex) will actually be married people using the dating site as a side hustle. They have a partner who they're actually working with who is their keeper, but they know dumb people are always out there and they're just looking for wallets to empty. The partner doesn't even care if their partner has sex with you or whatever as long as the cash and items they're obtaining is good enough. The chance that you're running into someone doing these scams is nearly 99%. I had a friend who ran into one and she'd have sex with him just for large bottle of vodka, but after that she wanted to "move in" with him so she could start looting the house. He let her stay over and while he was at work she'd be going through all his stuff looking for things to steal. She'd keep fighting with his older children because with them there she couldn't loot things with impunity. After figuring out what was really going on, he kicked her out, and without even a second of hesitation the "ex-boyfriend" showed up at his door to pick her up and weeks later they get married, lol. With a little research, we found she had about eight guys 'on the string' like this and this was basically her full-time job. Her real partner knew everything that was going on and didn't care who she had to have sex with to get things. He'd even come out there at odd hours while the marks were away to help her haul **** off to the pawnshop or wherever they had to be sold.
 

Stevicus

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
Nearly all of the women on those sites are just using at a side hustle. This isn't the way to find your next keeper regardless of the sex you're interested in. They're little more than prostitutes by proxy for the most part, and they are only there to trade sex for cash money. I don't think anyone here needs another hole in their wallet, lol.

I don't have a real problem with prostitution, as long as it's a fair transaction between two consenting adults. But when they hang out on sites for people looking for romantic relationships, then they're there under false pretenses.
 

icehorse

......unaffiliated...... anti-dogmatist
Premium Member
I had thought maybe if I were willing to pay for online dating maybe there might be a higher quality of folks and less scam artists. Anyone want to put their dating app names here? I won't do it unless I can use my check to pay.

Ok Cupid, I'm through with it, it's crawling with scam artists.

By my definition of passion, a person can be passionate ONLY about those things that are hard to master. It could be playing the violin, or photography, or even an advanced video game.

So @Riders - what are you passionate about? I think that there are many ways to meet people, but if you want to meet "high quality folks" (a good goal!), then lead with your passions!
 

ChristineM

"Be strong", I whispered to my coffee.
Premium Member
Online dating is a good way to meet soulmate but be ready to impress girl in real life. It's actually easy to do. Spend a romantic dinner together, buy her favorite flowers and a special gift. Girls like attention so make sure to be gentle and lovely. For example, my girlfriend likes unique things that's why I bought her an iPhone case from crocodile leather, she was delighted. By the way, visit Labodet.com to find such accessories.

Not all girls can be bought
 
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