1. Welcome to Religious Forums, a friendly forum to discuss all religions in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Access to private conversations with other members.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon!

Never Blushed So Hard

Discussion in 'Journals' started by mangalavara, Sep 13, 2021.

  1. mangalavara

    mangalavara Verified Account ✔
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2021
    Messages:
    462
    Ratings:
    +610
    Religion:
    Saura Hindu
    Earlier today, I posted a photo of myself in post #1098 in a thread meant for it. In that photo, I am wearing a maroon kurta that I had ordered online from a seller in Gujarat. (It is a short kurta, by the way). Not long after posting my photo, I went with my father to the dental. While I was on a couch in the waiting area reading a book, an Indian man in Western (not ‘cowboy’ Western) clothes walks in and sits on a couch nearby. Conscious that I am a man of European origin wearing a kurta, and that a man of Indian origin was in the same room, I felt myself blush. I really felt my whole face and my hands instantaneously turn red, and my face was warm! So, I held my open book up closer to my face and tried to cool down by distracting myself with the content. The book was Songs of the Saints of India. Soon, I cooled down and was back to normal. Nonetheless, I avoided making eye contact.

    Anyway, I wear kurtas in public all the time. Medium and short ones. Every time a South Asian person sees me, they never say anything. One time though, a South Asian man noticed a medium one, looked closer, and smiled.

    I’m sure there are some South Asians who may be opposed to people of European origin wearing South Asian clothing, but I have the impression that perhaps most would not be offended but flattered that I like the cultural clothing.
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  2. Meow Mix

    Meow Mix Chatte Féministe

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2010
    Messages:
    11,369
    Ratings:
    +6,187
    Religion:
    Nontheist
    Can you help explain the cultural background of why this would make you blush?
     
  3. mangalavara

    mangalavara Verified Account ✔
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2021
    Messages:
    462
    Ratings:
    +610
    Religion:
    Saura Hindu
    For me, it’s that I know I am a bit of an anomaly for wearing a kurta, so when a South Asian person was nearby in the same small, quiet room, I just could not help blush.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  4. JustGeorge

    JustGeorge Retired Ruler
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2020
    Messages:
    5,325
    Ratings:
    +10,601
    Religion:
    Hindu
    I've only had a bad reaction once to what I was wearing, and that was from a waiter at a local restaurant. He asked who wrapped my saree, and then told me my pleats were in the wrong spot. (I think I blushed, and I discovered they were! But I'd always gotten so much encouragement at the temple...)

    My favorite reaction was at a Pakistani grocer in the next city over. I came in wearing Punjabi style salwar kameez, and the grocer looked surprised, and asked "where are you from?" I gave him the name of the next city over. "No, no... I mean what country?" I told him the US. "But why are you wearing Pakistani clothes?" Well, because I think they're beautiful, I said. His face just lit up. "Really? Do you have a Pakistani friend who bought them for you?" I told him I'd purchased them on my own. That just made his day. He'd always been indifferent when I came in before, but now he is super friendly to me.

    My husband recently saved money by wearing a kurta pyjama. We had to stay in a hotel during our last temple trip, and he came through the lobby in the middle of the night wearing it. The desk clerk in the morning asked why he was wearing it, and my husband told him. He was excited, said he'd never seen an American man wear such a thing, and he gave him ten percent off his bill.
     
    • Like Like x 2
    • Winner Winner x 1
  5. Spiderman

    Spiderman Veteran Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2014
    Messages:
    16,688
    Ratings:
    +4,783
    Religion:
    Shintopathic
    No worries.

    We are all human. We all have reason to blush.

    Very odd you say this though.

    At our last group, I was busy journaling, so I didn't know what was going on. I just heard everyone say "Look at him turn red. Look at him blush".

    I turned to my right and saw a bald guy in what I believe was a tank top, so his whole arms were exposed and red, with his face and bald head all red. That was literally our last group before I read your post.


    It isn't like it means anything other than "Don't worry about it. You're a human being. We all have things we blush about." :)
     
    • Like Like x 2
  6. mangalavara

    mangalavara Verified Account ✔
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2021
    Messages:
    462
    Ratings:
    +610
    Religion:
    Saura Hindu
    Very cool moments! Except for the pleats, of course.
     
    • Friendly Friendly x 1
  7. JustGeorge

    JustGeorge Retired Ruler
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2020
    Messages:
    5,325
    Ratings:
    +10,601
    Religion:
    Hindu
    I had to learn somehow, I suppose. My temple friends were too nice to say "they go in the center, not the side, George!"
     
    • Like Like x 1
  8. sun rise

    sun rise "This is the Hour of God"
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2014
    Messages:
    63,010
    Ratings:
    +30,756
    Religion:
    Love
    When I've been in India, western women wearing saris was nothing special. Some of the Indian women were amused at the mistakes but in a very kindly way. Some western men wore Indian garb and no one minded.
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Informative Informative x 1
  9. Aupmanyav

    Aupmanyav Be your own guru

    Joined:
    May 5, 2007
    Messages:
    27,333
    Ratings:
    +12,276
    Religion:
    Atheist, Advaita (Non-duality), Orthodox Hindu
    No reason to be offended. Don't we wear Western outfits all the time? They will always appreciate. Indian clothes are quite comfortable, at least in our environment, no need to put on a tie.
    These South Asian people with their regional-minded! my son-in-law speaks fluent Bengali. Saw a Bangladeshi selling 'Jhaal-Moori' (snack) in New York. Spoke to him in Bengali. The "Jhaal Moori" packet did not cost him anything.

    He can speak Nepali also. So, in Kathmandu, he was asked how come he married a Kashmiri woman (my daughter)? He said they developed friendship in Delhi.
     
    #9 Aupmanyav, Sep 14, 2021
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2021
    • Like Like x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
  10. mangalavara

    mangalavara Verified Account ✔
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2021
    Messages:
    462
    Ratings:
    +610
    Religion:
    Saura Hindu
    Yeah, you guys wear Western clothes, which I have no reason to be bothered by at all. In my country, there are some people of a certain political mindset who would probably say that Western clothing is worn in India due to 'white colonialism' or something, and they would scream at me for being the 'white colonizer' 'stealing' Indian culture. Nobody has ever done that to me, so far. If anybody does, I would advise that person to speak to a few people here from the Indian subcontinent.

    Something that would really impress me would be seeing someone from India, Nepal, Bhutan, Pakistan, Bangladesh, or Afghanistan wearing Western as in 'Country Western' clothing, as I am from a part of the US where many people dress that way. Although I am not a big fan of Country Western clothing, I would feel impressed because of where I am from.

    Very nice to know. Yes, Indian clothes are indeed quite comfortable in my humid subtropical environment. :)
     
  11. Aupmanyav

    Aupmanyav Be your own guru

    Joined:
    May 5, 2007
    Messages:
    27,333
    Ratings:
    +12,276
    Religion:
    Atheist, Advaita (Non-duality), Orthodox Hindu
    Well, jeans are so popular here with the young people (both men and women). In villages, many do not like it. The powerful native (unofficial) village councils, known as Khaps, many a times prohibit wearing of jeans for girls or use of mobile phones. Even the elder people in cities like them. Jackets, though the young ones wear in winter, are inappropriate in Indian heat - 45 C. A shirt is always better.

    A Khap in progress (a khap may represent a village or a group of villages or a community, sometimes it represents all. That is known as a 'Maha panchayat, Great Gathering)
    [​IMG]
    The Gulabi Gang or the Pink brigade (Gulab is rose, the color of saries that they wear) - for drive against alcohol.
    [​IMG]
     
    #11 Aupmanyav, Sep 14, 2021
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2021
    • Like Like x 2
  12. JustGeorge

    JustGeorge Retired Ruler
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2020
    Messages:
    5,325
    Ratings:
    +10,601
    Religion:
    Hindu
    What's funny to me is the only people I've heard scream 'cultural appropriation' (in person, not news articles) have been upper middle class white folks...
     
    • Like Like x 1
  13. mangalavara

    mangalavara Verified Account ✔
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2021
    Messages:
    462
    Ratings:
    +610
    Religion:
    Saura Hindu
    Sounds like that sort of people who hold those views, yeah. Would you mind sharing what had occurred?
     
  14. JustGeorge

    JustGeorge Retired Ruler
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2020
    Messages:
    5,325
    Ratings:
    +10,601
    Religion:
    Hindu
    When I was first starting to become interested in Hinduism, I was part of a Unitarian Universalist church(I considered myself Pagan, and was under the impression it was welcoming to Pagans, but that's another story for another day). When I would mention that I wanted to visit a temple, or that I had interest in trying on a saree, the reverend would caution me on cultural appropriation. In hindsight, she probably just didn't want me gravitating away from her church(which I did).

    On an impersonal level, I just heard it mentioned a lot amongst the congregation. Many times, I didn't understand what the issue was; it appeared the person/people they were complaining about were appreciating another culture, but what did I know...
     
    • Like Like x 1
  15. mangalavara

    mangalavara Verified Account ✔
    Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2021
    Messages:
    462
    Ratings:
    +610
    Religion:
    Saura Hindu
    I would not be surprised that the minister of that congregation feared that you would gravitate away from it. From what I read some time ago, the UUC is declining due to its irrelevance.

    I wonder what they would think about racially segregated classrooms and graduation ceremonies. Such things sound like a regression in this country, but what do we who aren't upper middle class whites know? :cool:
     
  16. JustGeorge

    JustGeorge Retired Ruler
    Staff Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 25, 2020
    Messages:
    5,325
    Ratings:
    +10,601
    Religion:
    Hindu
    I feel it is becoming irrelevant, and they struggle to figure out why. (I have a few ideas.)
     
    #16 JustGeorge, Sep 14, 2021
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2021
    • Winner Winner x 1
Loading...