Before 4 years i failed to kill my self because of a girl i love. For some reason she cried because of it eaven tho she doesnt feel any emotions to me and after those years i cant get over her and i want to ask her out. I tried relationships with other girls but i always had that depressing feel inside that it wasnt her so i made a bull**** reason to break up with them.I would need advice from a female person about how to ask her out after all that because it seems like i cant get that girl to love me.
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Need advice about relationship
- Thread starter Samuel p
- Start date
You cannot make someone love you. You can't emotionally blackmail someone into loving you either.
Much of what draws us to another is physical and chemical attraction. It has to be two-way.
If the girl feels nothing for you, its time to let her go. Obsessing is not going to make her feelings change, and if you pester her you will only alienate her further. If its meant to be it will happen naturally....if it doesn't, then your obsession with this girl will only end badly. Respect her decision.
You not only have to get over her, but you have to get over yourself. The fact that you wanted to kill yourself over her is a sign that you are not emotionally stable or mature enough to sustain a healthy relationship in the first place.
Please get some professional help.
Much of what draws us to another is physical and chemical attraction. It has to be two-way.
If the girl feels nothing for you, its time to let her go. Obsessing is not going to make her feelings change, and if you pester her you will only alienate her further. If its meant to be it will happen naturally....if it doesn't, then your obsession with this girl will only end badly. Respect her decision.
You not only have to get over her, but you have to get over yourself. The fact that you wanted to kill yourself over her is a sign that you are not emotionally stable or mature enough to sustain a healthy relationship in the first place.
Please get some professional help.
In reading through what you wrote, this sounds more like unhealthy obsession than love. If she doesn't love you, you cannot make her.
If you have trouble letting it go of this obsession, I'll echo what @Deeje said and advise you to get professional help for the sake of both of you.
Its a terrible crush. Men feel this way, sometimes. We describe it many ways. All I can say is don't make the same mistake twice. Find a way to avoid this person. Make other friends, or get a pet, or get a new hobby -- something to fill the time. Heal as fast as you can, because a simple crush like this can be interminable if you don't put an end to it.
Audie
Veteran Member
The only posdible advice is, get over it.
It happens, thats life, let it go and look forward to a clean start.
I tired professional help, i was eaven in a mental hospital for 80 days. Nothing ever helped me. I eaven stopped believing in god because of of that. It was like he made the perfect oppotunity for me to ask her out. where was he when i seriously needed his help. Im just gonna be in an endless cycle of pain untill i die and burn in hell
Do you think that God is responsible for everything that happens in your life? Who told you that? Who said that God was in any way involved in your meeting this girl?
As free moral agents, when we are born, we are basically a blank canvas, who will be shaped by genetics and environmental factors..... like what kind of parenting we received. If you were raised with the notion that God is micro-managing everything that happens in life, then any wonder your are messed up! He doesn't do that.
We are the ones who determine who we become. We can be someone else's version of who we are supposed to be, or we can take responsibility for what we do and believe from today onward.
It's your life so whether it becomes a gift or a curse is up to you.
I guess professional help can only come from those dealing with people who fall into certain categories and when mental illness is a factor, then gaining control over the chemical processes in the brain is the first port of call. Medications can help with those things but you have to be prepared to experiment with different ones so that you can get your thought processes under control to start with.
Once you achieve that, then you work on your beliefs and sort out what you need to keep....what is healthy, and what you need to throw away as toxic.
Too many mental health patients' outcomes are hampered by their beliefs standing in the way of progress. Healthy beliefs about God can mean all the difference. Identify the toxic stuff and eliminate it.
For example, your last sentence tells me a lot about what is impeding your recovery.
There is no hell in the Bible, so if you want to discuss that, please let me know. It will be an enormous burden off your shoulders.
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