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Navigating through Internet discussions, for various purposes

Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
Nothing special about RF. It’s been the same in every social Internet forum that I’ve seen. It might not be possible for any forum to survive without insults and personal attacks. That’s why I’ve switched to discussing how to help reduce and counteract the damage.
There is the risk of deaf ears.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
Here’s an idea for people who want to discuss their disagreements without insults and personal attacks, and without the discussion being flooded with distracting posts. This will not eliminate distracting posts, but it might help reduce their effects on the discussions.

- Don’t use insults or personal attacks.
- Don’t respond at all in any way to distracting posts.

To avoid using insults and personal attacks, before posting, review your post to see if there’s anything in it about another poster’s character, capacities, motives or intentions; or associating them with some group or category of people. If so, remove it.
 
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Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
I think that not responding to people who associate me in their posts with some political, religious or identity faction might be a very good rule for me to follow.
Tis good to avoid those who vex us.
Even I do that, although those whom I vex might think otherwise.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
One if my points for reducing the distracting effects of distracting posts is to not respond to them at all in any way. No reply, no rating, no mention of them at all. That doesn’t mean that I don’t read them. I do, and sometimes i get ideas from them for what I say in the discussions.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
Tis good to avoid those who vex us.
Even I do that, although those whom I vex might think otherwise.
I don’t wait until they openly reveal their hostile intentions. I’ve learned from experience that when a person’s posts associate me with some group or category of people, no matter how friendly they look, it will always end in grief.
 

Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
I don’t wait until they openly reveal their hostile intentions. I’ve learned from experience that when a person’s posts associate me with some group or category of people, no matter how friendly they look, it will always end in grief.
There's always the option of correcting their misimpressions.
That sometimes works for me. If accepted, it's a really good sign.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
There's always the option of correcting their misimpressions.
That sometimes works for me. If accepted, it's a really good sign.
That has never worked for me here. Sometimes people pretend to accept the corrections, but they always go back to their same stereotypes within a few days.
 

Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
That has never worked for me here. Sometimes people pretend to accept the corrections, but they always go back to their same stereotypes within a few days.
I've run into backsliders too.
But some people rise above the fray.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
I've run into backsliders too.
But some people rise above the fray.
There are a few here who don’t stereotype me, but they never did. I’ll think about it some more, to see if I can think of anyone who has stopped stereotyping me as a result of me trying to correct their misrepresentations misunderstandings. Maybe you have some way of doing it that I haven’t tried yet.
 
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Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
There are a few here who don’t stereotype me, but they never did. I’ll think about it some more, to see if I can think of anyone who has stopped stereotyping me as a result of me trying to correct their misrepresentations. Maybe you have some way of doing it that I haven’t tried yet.
Well, you have hardly any posts here.
You need experience.
Get crack'n!
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
Well, you have hardly any posts here.
You need experience.
Get crack'n!
I can think of one person who might have stopped stereotyping me the way they were, but it wasn’t a result of anything that I ever said to them.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
It’s like I’m a voodoo doll for people to stick pins into sometimes, or an effigy for them to burn, to act out their grievances against some group or category of people.
 

Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
I can think of one person who might have stopped stereotyping me the way they were, but it wasn’t a result of anything that I ever said to them.
Oh, well...we must each discover what works for us.
I annoy staff. It keeps the old kroovy flow'n.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
There's always the option of correcting their misimpressions.
That sometimes works for me. If accepted, it's a really good sign.
Good, if that works for you. Maybe I’ll find some way some day to come out from under people stereotyping me.

Some of what I’ve been saying is for any two people who seriously want to have serious conversations about their disagreements, without any insults or personal attacks, and without distractions. I don’t think that it will ever be possible to do it without a flood of distracting posts from others, in any social Internet forums including this one, in less than a few more generations. What I think is possible is for the two people not to be distracted by those posts, if that’s what both of them want to do. For that purpose I think that if either one of them wants to respond in any way to any distracting posts, they would need to postpone that, or do it in another thread. The problem for me in having serious discussions with anyone has never been distracting posts. It has only ever been that for the other person, responding to some distracting posts is more important to them than their conversation with me.
 
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Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
Good, if that works for you. Maybe I’ll find some way some day to come out from under people stereotyping me.

Some of what I’ve been saying is for any two people who seriously want to have serious conversations about their disagreements, without any insults or personal attacks, and without distractions. I don’t think that it will ever be possible to do it without a flood of distracting posts from others, in In any social Internet forums including this one, in less than a few more generations. What I think is possible is for the two people not to be distracted by those posts, if that’s what both of them want to do. For that purpose I think that if either one of them wants to respond in any way to any distracting posts, they would need to postpone that, or do it in another thread. The problem for me in having serious discussions with anyone has never been distracting posts. It has only ever been that for the other person, responding to some distracting posts is more important to them than their conversation with me.
A way to see things....
Personal attacks are about the attacker's failure to understand &
to handle their anger. It's as affecting as rain rolling off your coat.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
I’ve been thinking about what to do about my own hostile feelings towards others. The best way for me has been to not say anything to them or about them until I can do it with genuinely friendly feelings.
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
Another distraction for me has been when a person follows me around, posting in threads where I’m posting, vilifying me in every post and persistently diverting attention from what I’m trying to discuss. I apply the same rule for myself of not saying anything to them or about them as long as I can’t do it with genuinely friendly feelings, but I can’t help wondering if there’s something they want from me, that I can give them. I’ve been tempted to do the same thing to a few people, myself, and actualy did it a few times, but I don’t understand why. I’ll try asking myself the same question: What do I want from them?
 

Jim

Nets of Wonder
It might be when I think that someone is fooling people and getting away with it. I want to try to expose the fakery. Maybe what I would want from them would be to stop fooling people. Only, they might not know that they’re fooling people. Then maybe I would want them to listen to people telling them that they’re fooling themselves and maybe some other people. No. maybe it’s the contemptuous way they treat me when I try to tell them that they’re fooling people.
 
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