Maybe i been wrong about the good diversity in this forum.

[Spirit of Light]

Maybe it is the diversity of this forum that make it so great Maybe I was wrong in wishing to only have calm and peaceful discussions? Maybe we all come back every day because we have a good time here, even we sometimes get into heated debate or discussion?

Could it be that I should have been better in tolerating the opinion of others, and when being critiqued for my own understanding, just think about it instead of pushing on?

Maybe I am the one failing to be more understanding and not you?

 

[Dawnofhope]

Maybe it is the diversity of this forum that make it so great Maybe I was wrong in wishing to only have calm and peaceful discussions? Maybe we all come back every day because we have a good time here, even we sometimes get into heated debate or discussion?

Could it be that I should have been better in tolerating the opinion of others, and when being critiqued for my own understanding, just think about it instead of pushing on?

Maybe I am the one failing to be more understanding and not you?

I don’t know about this forum some days and wonder if my time could be better spent elsewhere. Other days I really enjoy it and learn a lot. Its good to know we can have time out. I have low expectations of changing anyone’s thinking other than my own.

 

[Terry Sampson]

Think of RF like a "bumper car" adventure. If you're worried about getting hurt, you put on a helmet and protective padding like an American football player, you pick a bumper car on the side and get in, then you step on the footpad and go. You can start out intending to go from one side of the floor to the other. But most of us don't bother, because we know we never will. We just continue driving until someone turns off the electricity that makes our bumper cars move.

OR think of RF like the monkey pit in a zoo. One day, you walked by and saw all the monkeys in the pit, doing different things: picking each others fleas, wrestling, begging for food, and all the things that monkeys do. And you said to yourself: "Self, that looks interesting and maybe even fun." Now, you're in the pit and trying to figure out how to get out. LOL!

 

[Spirit of Light]

I don’t know about this forum some days and wonder if my time could be better spent elsewhere. Other days I really enjoy it and learn a lot. Its good to know we can have time out. I have low expectations of changing anyone’s thinking other than my own.

I had the same thoughts too Some days i feel energized by the discussions, and some days i come here to be nice, but end up insulting others, and of course I never intend to insult others. Its just the mood was wrong. And I should have kept silent. So I see it as my own fault, that my comments and OP sometimes make more trouble for me then it was needed to be

I found my self to be my worsted enemy in this forum Not the people i may disagree with. And i know one of my latest OP’s have stirred up a lot of noise around my understandings. So instead of being frustrated at them, i should turn that toward my self

 

[Nimos]

Maybe it is the diversity of this forum that make it so great Maybe I was wrong in wishing to only have calm and peaceful discussions? Maybe we all come back every day because we have a good time here, even we sometimes get into heated debate or discussion?

Could it be that I should have been better in tolerating the opinion of others, and when being critiqued for my own understanding, just think about it instead of pushing on?

Maybe I am the one failing to be more understanding and not you?

I think its very natural part of being human. And that it actually takes a bit of training, self examination or realization to get to grip with. What i'm referring to is our ability to hold on to our beliefs or at least some of them, and if people question them or point out flaw in them, that its very easy to see it as a personal attack on you as a person, and therefore one put up their defences.

Which can be expressed in different ways, like personally assaulting the person, just ignore what the other is saying, being upset etc.

But I think that if one can come to grip with ones beliefs not really being all that precious and that these are just temporary beliefs until they are replaced with something better or more informed (Doesn't have anything to do with religious beliefs, but just in general). Then you as a person will also start to actually value new information more and to have your beliefs tested.

To me personally, what made me start to at least try to be aware of this, were when I heard a lecture about "being wrong". And the person talking asked the question to the audience:

"What does it feel like to be wrong?"

And people say, that they felt bad, stupid and all those things.

But what you actually feel, when you are wrong, is that you are right. And to me that reply made a lot of sense.

So personally, Im trying my best to really not hold my beliefs all that sacred to me, I will argue for them being correct, if I think they are. But at the same time also constantly try to question them to see, if they are actually worth holding.

To me that makes it a lot more interesting seeking knowledge and especially working on and trying to improve the method of how I obtain new information, how to do critical thinking, how to be sceptical. So I at least to my self, can say that I tried the best I could to get the most information available before deciding what is most likely to be correct.

So being able to see the value of being wrong, ought to be a blessing rather than something bad, as it basically just mean that you have become smarter

 

[Spirit of Light]

I think its very natural part of being human. And that it actually takes a bit of training, self examination or realization to get to grip with. What i'm referring to is our ability to hold on to our beliefs or at least some of them, and if people question them or point out flaw in them, that its very easy to see it as a personal attack on you as a person, and therefore one put up their defences.

Which can be expressed in different ways, like personally assaulting the person, just ignore what the other is saying, being upset etc.

But I think that if one can come to grip with ones beliefs not really being all that precious and that these are just temporary beliefs until they are replaced with something better or more informed (Doesn't have anything to do with religious beliefs, but just in general). Then you as a person will also start to actually value new information more and to have your beliefs tested.

To me personally, what made me start to at least try to be aware of this, were when I heard a lecture about "being wrong". And the person talking asked the question to the audience:

"What does it feel like to be wrong?"

And people say, that they felt bad, stupid and all those things.

But what you actually feel, when you are wrong, is that you are right. And to me that reply made a lot of sense.

So personally, Im trying my best to really not hold my beliefs all that sacred to me, I will argue for them being correct, if I think they are. But at the same time also constantly try to question them to see, if they are actually worth holding.

At least, to me that makes it a lot more interesting seeking knowledge and especially working on and trying to improve the method of how I obtain new information, how to do critical thinking, how to be sceptical. So I at least to my self, can say that I tried the best I could to get the most information available before deciding what is most likely to be correct.

So being able to see the value of being wrong, ought to be a blessing rather than something bad, as it basically just mean that you have become smarter

Thank you @Nimos Yes you are correct in all you say here. Your words hit right where they needed to hit me

 

[Nimos]

Thank you @Nimos Yes you are correct in all you say here. Your words hit right where they needed to hit me

I don't know, if I ran into the same issue as you. Mine were not in regards to the forum, but more like looking at life in general and you have all these ideas flying around, people believing so many different things, and again nothing to do with religion, it could just as well be scientific theories where scientist don't agree, politicians want things to be certain ways, based on what they believe to be true. Which became a little overwhelming, because who should you believe?

So I started to take notice of what people actually said, and it is amazing how many claims people in general make, and how easy it is for them to argue why others should believe as they do, without them providing any evidence or reason for doing so. Its a bit hard to explain, but if one starts really paying attention to it, its unbelievable

And eventually, I basically just made up my mind, that I really had no clue, but that I would at least, do what I could to stay true to myself, and follow where there at least were evidence, and if they disagreed with what I thought was true, then be it, then I would have to change my views.

So guess one could call it my atheistic "spiritual" journey that im on and even if it doesn't lead me anywhere or makes me any wiser. Again I at least tried to stay true to myself and I tried to be as good as possible at doing critical thinking, as I could. As that to me, is basically the only tool we have to defend ourselves against false beliefs and nonsense. At least as I see it, if one is not good at critical thinking, I don't think one is good at evaluating evidence either, so the chance of getting mislead by bad evidence, is not good either. If that is how one is going to achieve new knowledge.

But it not easy and makes lots of mistakes as well and constantly find out things that surprise me and where i was wrong.

 

[Howard Is]

Think of it as resistance training.
No pain, no gain.

It is an excellent environment for developing resilience, and a thicker skin.
And, every now and then, someone exposes a weakness or error you were unaware of. That is something to be grateful for.

 

[Spirit of Light]

Think of it as resistance training.
No pain, no gain.

It is an excellent environment for developing resilience, and a thicker skin.
And, every now and then, someone exposes a weakness or error you were unaware of. That is something to be grateful for.

So true

 

[Revoltingest]

Maybe I was wrong in wishing to only have calm and peaceful discussions?

It's the "only" part you have wrong.
You'll have all kinds of discussions here.
Calm & peaceful ones are just part of the mix.
The others offer a choice....
1) Avoid, or...
2) Engage tooth & claw.
I usually pick #1.
But sometimes a big steamy #2 calls to me.
The trick is to make one's choice with open eyes & intention.

 

[Spirit of Light]

It's the "only" part you have wrong.
You'll have all kinds of discussions here.
Calm & peaceful ones are just part of the mix.
The others offer a choice....
1) Avoid, or...
2) Engage tooth & claw.
I usually pick #1.
But sometimes a big steamy #2 calls to me.
The trick is to make one's choice with open eyes & intention.

Again you are correct @Revoltingest Thank you

 

[BSM1]

Good luck finding that Disney RF, A...

 

[Spirit of Light]

Good luck finding that Disney RF, A...

Hehe you know i am sure i wont find it So I may just live with it as it is. Because in 99% of the time RF is a really good place. And sometimes I am the one who stirred up the last 1% that make it really uncomfortable for my self So who is to blame? Whoops that would be my self.

I created my own suffering, and blamed it on others, Not a very good choice from me, I should have know better.

 

[Revoltingest]

Good luck finding that Disney RF, A...

RF is no Disneyland.
It's more...

 

[Audie]

Maybe it is the diversity of this forum that make it so great Maybe I was wrong in wishing to only have calm and peaceful discussions? Maybe we all come back every day because we have a good time here, even we sometimes get into heated debate or discussion?

Could it be that I should have been better in tolerating the opinion of others, and when being critiqued for my own understanding, just think about it instead of pushing on?

Maybe I am the one failing to be more understanding and not you?

Certainly you are not wrong to hope for
more peace. Certainly you are onto something,
with introspection re your own role in failures
of understanding.

I've a way of being impatient, sometimes harsh.
Certainly my recent interaction with you was not
a model of diplomacy. I certainly can agree to
having myself as one who has faults!

I wonder if the thoughts you express in your post
extend to recognizing any problem with your recent
statement, though earlier you said you stand behind it.

"Atheists are not able to understand that even we
cannot see God".

It is obvious on the face of it that this is illogical,
and untrue!

Whether you were intending to be provocative,
or took time to think it through to see how it
could not be true, only you would know.

For my part, it would not have hurt to ask, rather than
state or counter-accuse.

So I will ask now. Did you intend to be provocative?
Do you understand why it was provocative?
Do you see why it could not be true?
Do you stand behind it?

ETA, To me a forum is a, among other things,
fine place to jump up and down, get excited
and engage in "combat".
Do you play chess? THAT is combat too.

In the event, should you (improbable!) show up
in Hong Kong I'd be delighted to serve you a cup of
tea and a scone, to you or any RFer.

 

[Audie]

It's the "only" part you have wrong.
You'll have all kinds of discussions here.
Calm & peaceful ones are just part of the mix.
The others offer a choice....
1) Avoid, or...
2) Engage tooth & claw.
I usually pick #1.
But sometimes a big steamy #2 calls to me.
The trick is to make one's choice with open eyes & intention.

Ha. Number one is for sissies!

 

[Revoltingest]

Ha. Number one is for sissies!

Or for those of us who know that some tar babies & briar patches aren't worth mess'n with.

 

[Audie]

Or for those of us who know that some tar babies & briar patches aren't worth mess'n with.

I do indulge myself in such foolishness,
though Ive sent many to ig city.

 

[Revoltingest]

I do indulge myself in such foolishness,
though Ive sent many to ig city.

Thanx you for not banishing this lowly swab to that place.

 

[Spirit of Light]

Thanx you for not banishing this lowly swab to that place.

I should learn to have more humor in my daily life Could learn a thing or two from you