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Love is not an easy experience when we have different spiritual background :)

Estro Felino

Believer in free will
Premium Member
My understanding of his post #23 was that his marriage has survived 53 years because of compromise....
Did I misunderstand his post? @metis
Ok... I am a Catholic...let's say my husband is an atheist.
I don't see why I should try to convert him to Catholicism.
Really...I can't see the reason.
 

McBell

Resident Sourpuss
Ok... I am a Catholic...let's say my husband is an atheist.
I don't see why I should try to convert him to Catholicism.
Really...I can't see the reason.
Seems to me it has to do with the "must convert" mindset a lot of theists have.
And if their goal is to buy their way to heaven by recruiting as many as possible, not converting ones spouse is the ultimate failure.

At least it sounds good........

While standing at the Pearly Gates Mestemia waited anxiously for the final score...

"Well." Saint Peter began, "our records show you converted 100,001 people. But you were unable to convert your wife. Which means you lose 5 points, making your total a mere 99,996.
Since you needed 100,000 to enter..."

Saint Peter pulls a lever and a trap door releases under Mestemia and straight to hell he goes.​
 

metis

aged ecumenical anthropologist
Compromise?
I think real love is about respecting your partner/spouse's free will.
And not to impose them your own faith or convinctions.
But sometimes an either/or position may have to be compromised, even if it's a "We'll do it your way this time, but ...". If neither of us were willing to compromise as times, then I can tell you right now our marriage of 53 years wouldn't have lasted.

PS. I hope your wife has never pushed you to become a Catholic. Whether with insistence or in a veiled way.
She never did, and when I went to synagogue, she came with me and never complained even though she could have stayed home and I would have understood.

With all due respect of course.
Ditto back at ya.
 

Estro Felino

Believer in free will
Premium Member
She never did, and when I went to synagogue, she came with me and never complained even though she could have stayed home and I would have understood.
.

So you were Jewish?
Nice, I didn't know that.
Well...you could have stayed Jewish.
I think an interfaith marriage can be very romantic.
Because romance is nurtured by the enrichment of 2 different cultures, 2 different religions.:)
In which neither spouse loses their own uniqueness.

As I said I would never want my boyfriend/husband to convert to my religion. As I would not want to convert to his.
 

metis

aged ecumenical anthropologist
So you were Jewish?
Not originally. I grew up in a fundamentalist Protestant church but left that in my mid-20's because of problems with them being anti-science and quite racist, and then I converted to my wife's Catholic faith. However, after almost 20 years there, I converted to Judaism (a long story), my wife didn't, and yet she came to almost all the services I did. After 20 years there, a series of "experiences" ["premonitions", which I often refer to as being "spiritual connections" to two other people], led me back to the Catholic Church whereas I feel I really belong.

At the synagogue, I co-taught the Lunch & Learn program with the rabbi, and now I'm teaching the RCIA program at the Church. IOW, no one can shut me up :)

Well...you could have stayed Jewish.
Correct. My wife had no idea I was converting back to Catholicism.

As I said I would never want my boyfriend/husband to convert to my religion. As I would not want to convert to his.
Good point, so both my wife have no regrets that we were active at both the Church and the synagogue.

And the best of luck with the relationship that you two have. :heart:
 

Estro Felino

Believer in free will
Premium Member
Going back to the thread topic, @metis, I think compromise can be about washing the dishes 3 or 4 times a week. Picking up kids from school.
Not converting to a religion. In my humble opinion:)

Religion is a serious, personal thing.
 

Spirit of Light

Be who ever you want
I fully agree.
I realized one thing some time ago :) i was a huge egoist because in a lot of my OP over a long time, it was about me and my belief. I ignored many who disagreed with my words. And I AM NOT THE ONE :) God is the one who know. I could say anything i wanted but still be clueless to what its all about.
RF is not a place to show of what is seen as wisdom :) and i tried that to many times. I wanted to be someone. But ended up at just an other guy who wanted to much. Wanted to know and failed.

So my "life" start again, new path where I am not in the middle :) i am just a curioues man wanting to know God
Realizing this grounded my feet on the ground.
The first prayer i did was for guidance, so now it is to look for that guidance and to humble when it happens :)
 

metis

aged ecumenical anthropologist
The first prayer i did was for guidance, so now it is to look for that guidance and to humble when it happens
That is great! We all need that, but as you know it takes time and a lot of contemplative prayer.

IMO, it's truly interesting, and in a good way, that you and I have had so many questions and have spent so much time trying to even get a start figuring out what's right and what to do about it. I'm still "a work in progress", so when I get it all figured out I'll let you know, OK? :rolleyes:
 

Spirit of Light

Be who ever you want
That is great! We all need that, but as you know it takes time and a lot of contemplative prayer.

IMO, it's truly interesting, and in a good way, that you and I have had so many questions and have spent so much time trying to even get a start figuring out what's right and what to do about it. I'm still "a work in progress", so when I get it all figured out I'll let you know, OK? :rolleyes:
Sound like a plan :) if i gain the answer to it i will tell you too. But you have a headstart on me. I know i need time to understand the new teaching.
 
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