I have to go for a while (an apology)

[Mindmaster]

My apologies I stopped reading his post after the part that said somethign about a schoolgirl in the first paragraph before commenting... looking back on it now yes Mindmaster gave very good advice and I should of read the rest of it.
--snip--
You guys make it so tempting to forget this whole hiatus.

Yea, sorry if that came off the wrong way I used to be the ''schoolgirl'" myself once upon a time. It wasn't an attempt to be critical of you, but rather just being brutally honest about the way that you can handle things. Stop beating yourself up it doesn't help and you will receive enough of it from surrounding people due to you being just a little more reactive.

At this point I merely observe the stream of impulses and emotions and act on them if it makes sense to do so. Once you learn to do that half of your problems immediately disappear -- do this long enough and you start to realize some of these impressions aren't your own. Then the fun really begins... Do train your mind though meditation will calm you down greatly through the mental rest you receive. Make a point of doing that at least once a day no matter what. If you can't get any quiet put on some headphones with some music to drown out the background. A few weeks of this and you will find the mood swings are more manageable.

 

[Orias]

I don't really agree with this statement. Technically it is correct but in effect it would only get me pumped and give my bravado, not real self-esteem.

Nonsense.

You attempt to concede from the forums in attempt to gain some sort of sympathetic charade and then continue to post in the forums after leaving your fellow members with a drawn out statement of apology.

Are you a Satanist or not?

It doesn't matter if you agree with or not, if self esteem is something you seek then stop sitting on the toilet and pretending to take a dump when all your doing is taking a ****.

 

[apophenia]

As for what Apophenia said I was originally going to respond but forgot to hit the multiple quote button and my laptop was already dying at that point. I was going to mention that I do often walk around town or ride my bike, but as I said my laptop was cutting out. I'll check in on this one more time today before trying to go for a while.

You guys make it so tempting to forget this whole hiatus.

It is good to see you staying in communication with people, bi-polar can be fully hellish if you cut yourself off from others, especially the ones who do know personally what you are going through. A lama once said to me, "you can be happy in hell if you're smart !". And he was no fair weather sailor - Tibet got pretty tough - he was the same one who said to a group of us " we're teaching you how to pack a parachute. You may not ever need this parachute, but if you do, you better hope you packed it right." I'm glad I paid attention.

Walking and riding are the most regular kinds of exercise I do on a daily basis, and bike riding in particular is great for clearing the head. But the kind of exercise I'm talking about is another level up. When you fully exert yourself to the point of going outside your comfort zone, something happens...

First off, read this - The Brain on Cortisol – Brain Leaders and Learners

Cortisol levels are crucial to manage. It is the substance in your body which feels like being on a dirty stimulant drug when stress levels get too high. As you know, depression is not just mental, it is a shocking physical sensation. Only people who suffer from it really get this. Intense exercise will immediately lower cortisol levels. That is such a relief when it happens. Also, your body will pump endorphins as a response to intense workouts. In other words, your body is a chemical factory, and the way you use your body and mind determines what kind of chemicals your body produces.

Resistance training, or any intense kind of workout, should only be done every second day. The body needs a 48 hour recovery period. Yoga can be done every day, although it is best to have at least one day per week when you fully rest.

Yoga also trains the body-mind with a relaxation response. The postures challenge you, and then while in the posture you consciously release yourself from the sense of strain. This teaches the whole system how to relax in a situation which would otherwise stress you, which may sound paradoxical, but it's true.

This information made life liveable for me when I put it into practice. You will also find it totally compatible with your beliefs and ritual practices.

If you want more info, please PM me. I am happy to tell you all I know, and help you design a program if you can't afford classes or a gym.

Cheers

 

[Orias]

Bipolar is a nonexistent disease just like ADHD or schizophrenia. Considering that I have been professionally diagnosed as all three!

All these diagnosis lack the proper aesthetics to postulate a more meaningful disorder, since most of these diseases are cured with placebos in the first place!

Bah, they are nothing more than a sad excuse to misbehave and take short cuts in the social world. People are no more accepting of a schizophrenic maniac than they are of a delusional Satanist. They almost coincide.

And then there is always, the problems you have ale in comparison to that of worldly standards.

I'm not buying it.

 

[apophenia]

Bipolar is a nonexistent disease

That is out of touch with the reality that many people live through.

All these diagnosis lack the proper aesthetics to postulate a more meaningful disorder, since most of these diseases are cured with placebos in the first place!

Where did you get the notion that "most of these diseases are cured with placebos in the first place" ? That is sheer invention on your part.

I would agree that there is evidence that ADHD is overdiagnosed, and may well be a diagnosis which some parents prefer to " you are neglecting your child's emotional needs, causing antisocial behaviour". Also there is evidence that clinical depression is diagnosed when people are experiencing ordinary human suffering, and that the drug companies are happy to make massive profits by medicalising things like loneliness and grieving.

So in some instances your point of view has merit, but you are taking an extreme and irrational position. I can understand that, having been very frustrated by the condition I had to learn to deal with.

You know that the body can be born with imperfections. Outer physical imperfections are easy to see, and of course you would never say that they are imaginary, or "excuse making". So why do you dismiss the afflictions of the brain ? The brain is a physical organ, like the kidneys or eyes. Why would you assume that there are illnesses in every part of the human anatomy except the brain ?

Bah, they are nothing more than a sad excuse to misbehave and take short cuts in the social world.

You are saying that out of frustration and anger.

People are no more accepting of a schizophrenic maniac than they are of a delusional Satanist. They almost coincide.

And then there is always, the problems you have ale in comparison to that of worldly standards.

I'm not buying it.

These statements reflect your inner dialogue about your experience.

You may well have been misdiagnosed, but your assertions are specious.

It seems to me that you want jasonwill2 to be a hero on your behalf, to reflect and verify the way you want to see your situation.

 

[Orias]

That is out of touch with the reality that many people live through

Many people are out of touch with reality.

Where did you get the notion that most of these diseases are cured with placebos in the first place" ? That is sheer invention on your part.

Is it?

It is the placebos, or artificialities that put them there in the first place. It would only make sense for them to be the way out.

I would agree that there is evidence that ADHD is overdiagnosed, and may well be a diagnosis which some parents prefer to " you are neglecting your child's emotional needs, causing antisocial behaviour". Also there is evidence that clinical depression is diagnosed when people are experiencing ordinary human suffering, and that the drug companies are happy to make massive profits by medicalising things like loneliness and grieving.

So in some instances your point of view has merit, but you are taking an extreme and irrational position. I can understand that, having been very frustrated by the condition I had to learn to deal with.

Irrational?

One must learn to walk on their own two feet eventually, and listen to the voice that is always right.

The rational part is that I am consistently doubtful of what is right, but with a sense of knowing/belonging the voices are instilling and true.

Percentages vary from person to person, but they are just that percentages...defining a totality of something. There is never a zero percent.

You know that the body can be born with imperfections. Outer physical imperfections are easy to see, and of course you would never say that they are imaginary, or "excuse making". So why do you dismiss the afflictions of the brain ? The brain is a physical organ, like the kidneys or eyes. Why would you assume that there are illnesses in every part of the human anatomy except the brain ?

Excuse me, I am not dismissing afflictions of the brain rather I am saying that the brain is an affliction.

You are saying that out of frustration and anger.

Keen observation.

These statements reflect your inner dialogue about your experience.

You may well have been misdiagnosed, but your assertions are specious.

They are specious?

That is...gratifying.

It seems to me that you want jasonwill2 to be a hero on your behalf, to reflect and verify the way you want to see your situation.

So then you will the same?

 

[apophenia]

Excuse me, I am not dismissing afflictions of the brain rather I am saying that the brain is an affliction.

I've had similar thoughts on many occasions, especially during encounters with the Black Dog.

Whether or not the brain is itself an affliction is a philosophical and personal issue. In fact it would be an interesting thread topic to pursue.

You may note that I am recommending strategies which are not medical. As a practitioner of martial arts, I would expect that you have found that physical training is positively beneficial on your own terms.

One aspect of the brain which is becoming much clearer is its plasticity. Neuronal connections can be dramatically altered by behavioural changes. This is the basis of much LHP activity IMO. That, combined with the chemistry one can affect internally through training like martial arts, yoga or resistance training, can be a powerful force of conscious metamorphosis.

There is a buddhist saying which is relevant to that - You can't cover the world in leather, but you can choose to wear shoes.

I do have respect for your attitude BTW. I sense that it is a response which reflects your attitudes to personal responsibilty for your mind state. I am suggesting though that some of your views are more idealistic than realistic.

 

[1137]

Bipolar is a nonexistent disease just like ADHD or schizophrenia. Considering that I have been professionally diagnosed as all three!

Apparently you haven't been to reality. Welcome, there's plenty of ****** things here.

All these diagnosis lack the proper aesthetics to postulate a more meaningful disorder, since most of these diseases are cured with placebos in the first place!

I'm not sure what your talking about. The only thing to ever temporarily cure me from this is my own mental power. But when you are fighting your mind with your mind it gets complicated. I think you are in denial, which is fine if it works

Bah, they are nothing more than a sad excuse to misbehave and take short cuts in the social world. People are no more accepting of a schizophrenic maniac than they are of a delusional Satanist. They almost coincide.

A sad excuse to misbehave? Since when do people need excuses? I do not use my depression, chronic pain, or drug addiction as an excuse almost ever. When I do, it's as BS as all excuses. However there is a difference between excuse and explanation. I think what is delusional is the belief that such things do not exist. I though it was Christianity's job to deny scientific fact, not Satanists. Psychology and medication are BS, but not the problems and symptoms. It is such treatments that are short cuts, and quite counterproductive ones.

I'm not buying it.

Why not reject other scientific knowledge while you are at it?

 

[1137]

Not all psychology, I meant therapy and such. It can help unless you realize the doctors only are pretending to care cause you are paying them. Also, even though something is over diagnosed does not make it fake, just makes the field of western medicine completely corrupt. Huge shocker there...

 

[Adramelek]

Also, even though something is over diagnosed does not make it fake, just makes the field of western medicine completely corrupt. Huge shocker there...

Yea, I agree with this last part, I pay $116.00 for 30 pills of the generic form of Effexor XR 150 mg for my depression. And pay around $11.00 for 30 generic Xanax 0.1 mg (blue footballs), which isn't a whole lot cash, but Xanax is a narcotic.

 

[Orias]

I've had similar thoughts on many occasions, especially during encounters with the Black Dog.

Whether or not the brain is itself an affliction is a philosophical and personal issue. In fact it would be an interesting thread topic to pursue.

You may note that I am recommending strategies which are not medical. As a practitioner of martial arts, I would expect that you have found that physical training is positively beneficial on your own terms.

One aspect of the brain which is becoming much clearer is its plasticity. Neuronal connections can be dramatically altered by behavioural changes. This is the basis of much LHP activity IMO. That, combined with the chemistry one can affect internally through training like martial arts, yoga or resistance training, can be a powerful force of conscious metamorphosis.

There is a buddhist saying which is relevant to that - You can't cover the world in leather, but you can choose to wear shoes.

I do have respect for your attitude BTW. I sense that it is a response which reflects your attitudes to personal responsibilty for your mind state. I am suggesting though that some of your views are more idealistic than realistic.

Good.

Now something that should also be made clear is that the platform of life is just that, the scenes and roles we chose to play throughout life are beyond the scopes of reality and philosophy.

Since it is the very comprehension in which we lack, that allows us to pursue a complete physical relationship with ourselves and others. (This may not make sense at first, but if we didn't lack something we wouldn't try to gain it)

Ideals and reality, they are the same. Not one person should say life isn't fair, because for some life is fair. Some work for it, some don't, some just don't care. Its what we make of it, I say life is good even if others feed off the suspended drama. Tolerance is something I must always push to my limits, how I perceive someone and the thoughts I have while I'm communicating with them(which may not have anything to do with what I am actually saying).

What matters is that what other people tell you are all perceptions of their own DNA, a fathoming of what they constitute as being right and correct, influence.

Greater magic tends to be a bit more dramatic and a little more costly, but the tendencies of such things has become a little more prevalent in the world around me or so I have seemed to notice.

Apparently you haven't been to reality. Welcome, there's plenty of ****** things here.

You're right, I only exist.

I'm not sure what your talking about. The only thing to ever temporarily cure me from this is my own mental power. But when you are fighting your mind with your mind it gets complicated. I think you are in denial, which is fine if it works

It is hard to deny when one is convinced, but then again, it is hard to convince when one wants to deny.

The diagnosis we give to the psychological invocations are nothing more than a binary relapse. Schizos and bipolar people tend to be more creative and on the edge of something "new", the part that is treated is the poor sap who let the outside world cave his soft skull in. With that being said, most psychologists themselves have some sort of personality disorder.

Normal is only determined by Joe when the one doing the determining has yet to understand the laws of the universe.

A sad excuse to misbehave? Since when do people need excuses? I do not use my depression, chronic pain, or drug addiction as an excuse almost ever. When I do, it's as BS as all excuses. However there is a difference between excuse and explanation. I think what is delusional is the belief that such things do not exist. I though it was Christianity's job to deny scientific fact, not Satanists. Psychology and medication are BS, but not the problems and symptoms. It is such treatments that are short cuts, and quite counterproductive ones.

What is scientifically factual besides that it exists because of the very reason we are discussing?

Why not reject other scientific knowledge while you are at it?

Science knows little.

 

[Orias]

With all of that being said, I know little besides my unknowing.

The page we read in the book of Life is the same and so is where the page came from, which introduces the next page.

Interpretation is a janitors key chain.

 

[jasonwill2]

um ok its been two weeks since i left and i gave one update... but i think at least for now I will come back but just try to limit my participation but get more involved as I become more stable at least for now.

I may just be going through the manic/normal stage of the cycle, but I feel relatively ok these last few days for no apparent reason.

So for now I am back.

 

[Iti oj]

um ok its been two weeks since i left and i gave one update... but i think at least for now I will come back but just try to limit my participation but get more involved as I become more stable at least for now.

I may just be going through the manic/normal stage of the cycle, but I feel relatively ok these last few days for no apparent reason.

So for now I am back.

welcome back.