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Gay adoption is good for children

Discussion in 'General Religious Debates' started by Autodidact, Feb 12, 2008.

  1. kdrier

    kdrier Revolutionist

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    Remember, we're talking about adoption here, so none of this would apply. And, obviously, having a great relationship with someone doesn't require being exactly like them.

    It's not required, but it sure helps having a few things in common. I think an older man would get along a lot better with a boy than a lesbian more often than not.

    I am suggesting that it is better for the children to allow gay and lesbian couples to adopt them.

    Yes, having parents, gay or not, is better than not having parents, I agree.

    do you have any research to support your assertion that children with a mom and a dad are in any way mentally healthier than children with two moms or two dads?

    It's just common sense to me, it's something I assume, I don't need nor care about so called research. I think most of the time a child with traditional parents will encounter less problems in their life, not's not to say they still won't have a good life aside from any bumps in the road. But like I said " you can't have masculine without feminine, therefore having both a masculine and feminine influence is a must to ensure the mental health of a child. I'm not saying it's not possible, but it's not the best for a child "
     
  2. rheff78

    rheff78 I'm your huckleberry.

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    Well you know my feelings on this. I tihnk it is good for a child to have a mother and a father in the picture. You have to have two different perspectives in life. Two men or two women, regardless of how manly or feminine they are, are only going to offer one side. God loves wonderous variety. Gay adoption seems kind of repetitious.
     
  3. sandy whitelinger

    sandy whitelinger Veteran Member

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    Because the odds are greater that is the relationship they will wind up in and consequently it should be modeled.
     
  4. kdrier

    kdrier Revolutionist

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    I think sandy has laid it out better than myself, at least more intelligently =)
     
  5. sandy whitelinger

    sandy whitelinger Veteran Member

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    Wow, it's been a while since anyone has accused me of being intelligent.
     
  6. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

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    Human nature.
     
  7. Smoke

    Smoke Done here.

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    Then we should make a special effort to see that gay children are brought up by straight parents.

    But actually, that's just silly. My parents taught me very well, by example, how a loving couple relate to each other and how they treat each other, and it's stood me in good stead in my marriage despite the fact that they're in an opposite-sex marriage and I'm in a same-sex marriage. If we needed a model that was exactly like ourselves, my parents' example would have been useless to me. The sex of the parents isn't what matters.
     
  8. Gentoo

    Gentoo The Feisty Penguin

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    Not so. Genetics are not the only thing that make you who you are. Nature vs. nurture, they're both important.

    Who says the immediate family is a closed system? Was your mother the only adult female role-model in your entire life?
     
  9. Mike182

    Mike182 Flaming Queer

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    sorry this post might get kinda long...

    gays are very resilient. i went through 5 years of rather intense bullying at school because i was gay, i took it and put up with it for 5 years before i started complaining. i know lots of homosexuals who's testimony is the same as mine. we are very, very resilient when we need to be.

    then the parents are perhaps not fit parents.

    no, i think most gays would actually be aware of their own past, of societies views towards them, and take that into consideration when raising children. of course there will be a few gay parents who bring their child up to be very sheltered, but so do some straight parents, so this isn't really a valid point, as this is more an issue on individual aptitude to raise kids than it is an issue on sexuality and family life.

    i don't feel you have gone far enough to make obvious the "obvious reasons" for why a traditional family unit is best.

    that's nice, i'm grateful that you agree with gay and lesbian adoption to the extent that you do. i don't much care for your opinion on lesbians having artificial insemination, but that's for a different thread.




    now then, you may have noticed that i have colored some parts of some posts red. i am going to address all of these parts i have colored red now.

    all of the points colored in red are making the same point, that children need a male and a female role model in their lives as they are growing up, although for some reason no one has explained or justified this notion. this is my counter to this point: is the family just who ever lives in the house? no it is not, there is the extended family of aunts, uncles, cousins, grand parents etc. there are plenty of male and female role models in the extended family gay parents could use for their kids to draw upon if they feel that they are lacking certain gender-specific qualities their kids need to learn from. not that i believe there are gender-specific qualities, and i don't believe a kid will be adversely affected by not having parents of different sexes, but for those who do believe this, the extended family and the friends of the parents can counter this imbalance.
     
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  10. Mike182

    Mike182 Flaming Queer

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    i was going to include my response to this post in my last post, but i felt like singling it out for what it is - the biggest contradiction i have seen in this thread.


    God loves variety, but gays shouldn't be parents? that is hysterical. or is it only the variety that you approve of that God loves? variety of family types not a valid variety to have?

    L.O.L.
     
  11. Ringer

    Ringer Jar of Clay

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    Not that I don't agree with what you are saying, but isn't that a little unfair to the extended family to be expected to play that much of a roll into the child's development? In my case that wouldn't be an issue as my extended family is very important and close to me but I don't expect all families to operate like that. Very frequently, I find that my friends have aunts and uncles that they don't see on a regular basis and the only family they consider having are those in their immediate family. Anyway, not sure where I wanted to go with this but just thinking out loud. Maybe it would be better to concentrate on the immediate family first with the mindset that extended family isn't going to have any part in the child's development? If the extended family wants to have an active role and do as you suggest then that's great but if not, well, we planned for that scenario as well.
     
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  12. Autodidact

    Autodidact Intentionally Blank

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    Why gay adoption is good for children:
    1. If you have a heart of steel, go to the website of your state's Department of Social Services, and click on a link for "waiting children." There you will see the beautiful faces of dozens of children who did not choose to be born to parents who couldn't take care of them, and who have been living in foster care, children whose only wish and desire is a "forever family." They deserve to get one, but there just aren't enough of them to go around. If gay and lesbian families are available and willing to adopt some of these children, as I have, it would make their dreams come true.
    2. That may be why every child welfare agency favors allowing gay and lesbian people to adopt.
    from here.
    3. All of the unbiased research based on sound methodology has found that children of gay and lesbian parents do at least as well on every measurable outcome as children of heterosexual families.
    The research is summarized here.
     
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  13. Mike182

    Mike182 Flaming Queer

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    i concede your point, not everyone sees their extended family regularly, and it certainly would be unfair to commit them to a child against their will. the point i was trying to address and counter was the point that a gay parentage lacks any sense of a masculine/feminine balance and lacks either a male or female role model to the point where we should forbid gay adoption. if it is found that gay parents are lacking in this aspect, it can easily be balanced by introducing a strong male or female character into the child's life.
     
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  14. Autodidact

    Autodidact Intentionally Blank

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    As for the role model issue, I think that what children need as role models are good people, people with morals, caring people, who can model for the child how to be a functioning, caring, competent adult. I just don't think that the gender aspect of role modelling is that important--children grow up to be the gender they are born, and express their individual version of that. They have plenty of opportunity to observe people of both genders around them every day, not only in the extended family, but at school, with friends, in clubs, through siblings, and so forth. What gay and lesbian adoptive parents model is contributing to society by committing to taking care of a child, and that is more important than teaching "how to be a young lady" or "how to be a real man."
     
  15. Autodidact

    Autodidact Intentionally Blank

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    I have colored red that part of your post which indicates a blatant disregard for reality.
    In fact, there are actually some ways in which gay and lesbian parents outshine heterosexual parents.
     
  16. jeffrey

    jeffrey †ßig Dog†

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    I think love is the most important part of any child's upbringing. I could care less what their sexual orientation is as parents, it's the love they give the child. And the child they bring up would be one less homophobic person in the world. [​IMG]
     
  17. Dislekseyuh

    Dislekseyuh Member

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    I don't even know why people are even bothering to discuss this. This should be a non-issue.

    What it boils down to is that it anyone could be a good or bad parent regardless of their sexual orientation or anything else.
     
  18. yossarian22

    yossarian22 Resident Schizophrenic

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    Given that I can't seem to find the actual methods used in the study. Didn't see any mention of alpha levels or anything eye popping, so I have to go with the null hypothesis here. Gay/Lesbian parents are equal to heterosexual parents in parental skills, as well as everything else.
     
  19. Somkid

    Somkid Well-Known Member

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    As this is kind of a new concept I think we have to wait a few years and see what the end result is psychologically on the adopted children.
     
  20. Mike182

    Mike182 Flaming Queer

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    i sort of agree with you, but there are much worse things for a kid to grow up with than gay parents, which while damaging, are not the end of the world. i don't think there are going to be any adverse affects of gay adoption on kids psychologically speaking.
     
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