Forgive AND Forget?

[Thief]

Grandma spoke as if you can forgive.....but you won't forget.

say otherwise?

 

[Revoltingest]

Never forgive, & never forget.

 

[Terese]

If you forgive, you will eventually forget it.

 

[YmirGF]

To forgive a grave injustice is admirable. To forget a grave injustice is incredibly stupid.

 

[Thief]

Never forgive, & never forget.

that was not an invite to simply say so
or maybe......you don't do either?

 

[Thief]

If you forgive, you will eventually forget it.

I think that won't happen
if you forgive the offense and then forget.....
the offender might not

if the offender realizes you have forgotten you are at mercy of a repeat.

 

[Thief]

To forgive a grave injustice is admirable. To forget a grave injustice is incredibly stupid.

would that include a waiver of compensation?
(as in forgiving a debt)

 

[Terese]

I think that won't happen
if you forgive the offense and then forget.....
the offender might not

if the offender realizes you have forgotten you are at mercy of a repeat.

How am I at a mercy at a repeat? Forgetting doesn't necessarily mean completely losing the memory. Just letting it pass.

 

[Thief]

How am I at a mercy at a repeat? Forgetting doesn't necessarily mean completely losing the memory. Just letting it pass.

well, I was thinking a lapse in thought....
if you allow the event to lapse....and the offender returns.....
you would be at risk.

 

[Terese]

well, I was thinking a lapse in thought....
if you allow the event to lapse....and the offender returns.....
you would be at risk.

You would then. Yes. Dumb thing to do. I hope you're not asking for advice!

 

[Thief]

You would then. Yes. Dumb thing to do. I hope you're not asking for advice!

oh no....I've had a lot of practice turning the other cheek.
and THAT practice is actually dangerous!

be careful....

 

[Senseless]

Can't do either currently. Don't expect this to change soon. Or ever.

 

[Thief]

What if the next life is focused on line drawn?
It might be important to heaven your ability to walk along side an offender

 

[Revoltingest]

that was not an invite to simply say so
or maybe......you don't do either?

Never!
The best some offender might hope for is that I will tolerate them....but only for a minor sleight.

 

[Thief]

Never!
The best some offender might hope for is that I will tolerate them....but only for a minor sleight.

I dare to say....offense by someone you know is forgiven easier than offense of a stranger?
or is your weigh scale blind to your feelings?

 

[Shadow Wolf]

To forgive things under certain circumstances is really just a normal part of being human. However, to forget means you may needlessly find yourself back on square one.

 

[Revoltingest]

I dare to say....offense by someone you know is forgiven easier than offense of a stranger?
or is your weigh scale blind to your feelings?

Hmmm....which is worse, to be slighted by an acquaintance or a stranger.
I say the acquaintance is to be hated more.

 

[Olinda]

Grandma spoke as if you can forgive.....but you won't forget.

say otherwise?

First, I need to think it through to identify anything I did towards the incident. It's a bit like the health and safety stuff.
Then I try to forgive. Whether or not I succeed, I aim to at least shut up about it.

 

[HeatherAnn]

Hmmm....which is worse, to be slighted by an acquaintance or a stranger.
I say the acquaintance is to be hated more.

Yes, and a friend or family even more - because hatred is frustrated expectations/frustrated love.

To forgive is to "give" to go "for"ward - so it's mostly for the forgiver, so the anger doesn't (sometimes literally) "eat them up inside."
Anger is not a friend nor enemy. It serves a purpose - to help us progress, gives us energy to improve conditions, assert ourselves etc., but (as Aristotle explained), it's not easy to express anger appropriately.
I'm not sure, but it seems that anger must be processed - not denied, but not dwelled on either.
Exercise helps to process it, as does writing and music.

Forgetting is not possible, unless we get amnesia or in denial and is not ideal because we need to learn from the past - to not repeat it, and to do better for ourselves and others.

"Forgiveness is the key to happiness"
IMO, It's easier to forgive if:
1) You see it's not personal (you have healthy self-esteem).
2) You are in tune/connected with unconditional/infinite love (God).
3) You are not still being hurt by the person - you have boundaries etc.
4) You understand and empathize with weaknesses inherent in being human.
5) You see hope.

 

[Thief]

Hmmm....which is worse, to be slighted by an acquaintance or a stranger.
I say the acquaintance is to be hated more.

as this is in the religious debate section.....let's look up.....

If God knows you.....and you offend Him.....
is it better that way?

What if God doesn't know you.....and He comes looking for the troublemaker.?