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Doctorial thesis on life origin

tom_mich

Member
Anybody want to read my doctoral thesis in biological sciences from Liberty University? It's in ornithology.

Origin of Ducks.

Who made the ducks? God made the ducks.


Well, what do you think? Please hire me, I want to be a University professor.
 

Ori

Angel slayer
Hmmm, you have obviously put a lot of research into this, your argument is strong, the evidence is astounding.

Now, pass me that pipe.
 

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
Astounding! Simply astounding! The way you cut through the evidence straight to the chase is masterful.
 

Pah

Uber all member
tom_mich said:
Anybody want to read my doctoral thesis in biological sciences from Liberty University? It's in ornithology.

Origin of Ducks.

Who made the ducks? God made the ducks.


Well, what do you think? Please hire me, I want to be a University professor.
I wouldn't bother submitting an application at Kansas University but I understand some high schools are hiring
 

AtheistAJ

Member
tom_mich said:
Who made the ducks?
Objection! Leading! - Overruled, you are hereby sentenced to an eternity to hell with no chance of salvation, by the power bestowed upon me by the great commonwealth of Kentucky and the LORD God!
 

Nehustan

Well-Known Member
only the bad ones....didn't you know thats the original lingusitic root of 'hoi sin'. On the day of judgement as the ducks line up, it'll be 'Hoi good' and 'Hoi Sin', and thus heaven or hell.
 

Fade

The Great Master Bates
Nehustan said:
only the bad ones....didn't you know thats the original lingusitic root of 'hoi sin'. On the day of judgement as the ducks line up, it'll be 'Hoi good' and 'Hoi Sin', and thus heaven or hell.
If a duck went to hell would you get crispy duck!?
 
A

angellous_evangellous

Guest
tom_mich said:
Anybody want to read my doctoral thesis in biological sciences from Liberty University? It's in ornithology.

Origin of Ducks.

Who made the ducks? God made the ducks.


Well, what do you think? Please hire me, I want to be a University professor.
That's your dissertation? Just the right size for the same cereal box that ID came out of.

University of Kansas needs someone to chair their Religion Department. I'm sure they'd love to have you.

(Remember Pah, the guy was lynched and fired for planning to teach AGAINST evolution):D
 

Valjean

Veteran Member
Premium Member
This thesis is overly narrow. What about the grebes, geese, puffins or even the penguins?
 

drekmed

Member
In the beginning God created the penguin, and the conversation went like this.

God: Well penguin, I guess I sort of messed up a bit. I forgot I was giving birds wings so they can fly.

Penguin: Oh, thats ok God. I dont mind walking.

God: Oops, gave ya short legs, but hey we can work this out.

Penguin: What do You suggest Lord?

God: Well, the things that would have been your wings look like flippers, why don't you try swimming?

Penguin: WOW!! Thats a great idea God, I love the water, and I hear Florida is nice.

God: Ooowh. About Florida, put sharks there, but I think you'll like the arctic.

Penguin: ........

God: Awe, come on little guy, it's like a big slip-and-slide.

Penguin: What about the polar bears?

God: Oh....right.... don't worry they sleep during the winter.

Penguin: Killer whales?

God: They migra......don't worry about them.

Penguin: You SUCK! and why do i look like a butler?

God: You're sooooooo cuuuute.

Penguin: ah crap.


The End.

the views and events portrayed in this transicpt are factual only in the mind of the author and those that choose to be as delusional as he.:jester5:

Drekmed
 

Bunyip

pro scapegoat
Shhhh.........

I have the answers for your final exam in bio chemistry;
1. God did it.
2. It was God.
3. God.
4. An all powerful immaterial, timeless being external to the universe. (Also accepted -God did it).
5. It was God.
6. God.

Don't tell anyone ok?!!
 
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