PoetPhilosopher
Veteran Member
I have the option of getting a counselor if I decide I need it. It's an interesting thought, really. I value most psychiatrists and their opinion, they are very well qualified. But well, the first time I pursued counseling from a program, I'm talking counselors not psychiatrists, I was given a counselor younger than I am, who seemed to understand the world less than me. They had a very "go with whatever you think is best" idea of things, but told me they were rooting for me. It was nice and all, kind of like a paid friend I guess, but not really what I'm looking for, if I do decide to try my luck with a counselor again.
There exists a certain disconnect from me and the world, and I'd hope the counselor would be wise enough to understand that. For example, I don't typically experience much grief, rather I experience random thought loops that occasionally get stuck, and intrusive thoughts. It was thought by a family member that I was still dealing with the death of another family member which happened some years ago and still trying to cope with it. When that's not what I deal with in terms of anxiety. Sure I miss the person who has passed away, but now a source of anxiety is that my family became more conservative since then, while I've either stayed the same or become more progressive. My family's way of dealing with problems is worshipping God, becoming more Christian, and kind of expecting others they care about to do the same. My way of dealing with problems is saying "That's life", getting a soda, and hoping after the funeral we can seek to forget about it, not bringing it up too much. I exist on my own wavelength - sometimes I thank people for being there and not getting involved, and sometimes I become damaged in people, not fully understanding of me, trying to improve/"fix" me instead.
As far as counselors go, I would want someone streetsmart when it comes to the world and with experience, or if they are just booksmart, that they can just give me the raw data on improving thought-processes which they learned in college rather than trying to go on some goose-chase for "grief" in me in areas where there isn't any like my family does.
I mean, I mostly just see the world as a giant comedy book with people with under 8-12 years college experience as thinking they can "help" you in some complex field, as often having to role-play to an extent, much like I sometimes feel uncomfortable and have to role-play a person whose mind doesn't cut through his own and other's double standards, and who isn't counting by the power of 2 and thinking about technology and where my next soda is coming from and my increasing affection of Lord Vishnu as the counselor talks to me about my feelings and family members passing away and what they supposedly meant to me and how important family is, and how important family and traditional values are to them.
There exists a certain disconnect from me and the world, and I'd hope the counselor would be wise enough to understand that. For example, I don't typically experience much grief, rather I experience random thought loops that occasionally get stuck, and intrusive thoughts. It was thought by a family member that I was still dealing with the death of another family member which happened some years ago and still trying to cope with it. When that's not what I deal with in terms of anxiety. Sure I miss the person who has passed away, but now a source of anxiety is that my family became more conservative since then, while I've either stayed the same or become more progressive. My family's way of dealing with problems is worshipping God, becoming more Christian, and kind of expecting others they care about to do the same. My way of dealing with problems is saying "That's life", getting a soda, and hoping after the funeral we can seek to forget about it, not bringing it up too much. I exist on my own wavelength - sometimes I thank people for being there and not getting involved, and sometimes I become damaged in people, not fully understanding of me, trying to improve/"fix" me instead.
As far as counselors go, I would want someone streetsmart when it comes to the world and with experience, or if they are just booksmart, that they can just give me the raw data on improving thought-processes which they learned in college rather than trying to go on some goose-chase for "grief" in me in areas where there isn't any like my family does.
I mean, I mostly just see the world as a giant comedy book with people with under 8-12 years college experience as thinking they can "help" you in some complex field, as often having to role-play to an extent, much like I sometimes feel uncomfortable and have to role-play a person whose mind doesn't cut through his own and other's double standards, and who isn't counting by the power of 2 and thinking about technology and where my next soda is coming from and my increasing affection of Lord Vishnu as the counselor talks to me about my feelings and family members passing away and what they supposedly meant to me and how important family is, and how important family and traditional values are to them.
