Compassion fatigue

[It Aint Necessarily So]

This term originally comes from the medical field and refers to a reaction caused by some combination of emotional (and often physical) exhaustion from overwork, exposure to excessive and prolonged suffering in others, and a sense of powerlessness. It manifests as a relative shutdown of empathy as a defensive mechanism - kind of emotional numbing. We saw this on a large scale with nurses and doctors during the peak of pandemic.

These times are rife for compassion fatigue. We just witnessed a pandemic. Throw in Ukraine, mass shootings, and those displaced by extreme weather. Throw in babies unable to get formula and those threatened by financial insolvency and homelessness. Throw in the loss of abortion rights and the concern about the well-being of pregnant women. The bees are dying. Throw in the threat of nuclear war, and the other consequences of extreme weather including the suffering of the beasts, and it is easy to see why feeling in an empath might shut down partially or completely in self-defense.

I try to deal with it through acceptance (Kubler-Ross' fifth stage of grief), a skill I learned working for hospice. The worst that can happen may happen, but it doesn't have to be an excessively emotional ride.

Getting back to hospice, those who could not accept the terminal nature of a loved one's illness suffered much more as they witnessed the ineluctable ongoing deterioration of the terminally ill loved one than those who had accepted the overwhelmingly likely fact that this process cannot be stopped, the optimists always expecting a miracle, never getting it, their emotions repeatedly dashed against the rocks with every decline. The others also suffered, but less so.

That's what my experience of watching America die was like until I accepted it. It's OK if America dies, because it looks like it needs to go on hospice now. It's OK if the Republicans regain control, because they probably will. This upcoming election is critical, and liberal patriots are very worried about the outcome. Not I. I have preferences, but I expect the right to eventually prevail soon and steal America's wealth for the few. Oh, well. Que sera sera.

Is this an issue for some here? Was it and it has since resolved somewhat or entirely? What are your coping strategies if you are suffering because of your empathy?

 

[Stevicus]

Is this an issue for some here? Was it and it has since resolved somewhat or entirely? What are your coping strategies if you are suffering because of your empathy?

I've taken a more detached approach to things over the past couple of decades. It's not that I stopped caring or even became numb, but most of the problems America faces today are self-inflicted and caused by our own excesses, recklessness, and myopia.

Throughout much of my life, I've seen and heard warnings about what could happen if we're not careful. The Energy Crisis of the 1970s should have been a wake-up call, but people failed to heed the warning. None of what we're seeing today should be viewed as any kind of unexpected "surprise." But too many people had this "don't worry, be happy" and "me first" attitude that they just stuck their heads in the sand and simply didn't care about the consequences of what they were doing.

Of course, in all fairness, I would concede that we haven't yet reached the point of no return. America's fall is not yet a "done deal." The lights are still burning, the internet is still turned on, there's still food at the grocery stores, gas at the gas stations - even if there might be some signs of shortages, supply chain issues, etc. The zombie apocalypse hasn't hit just yet, but it may be coming, or maybe not.

During the Cold War, and especially after the movie "The Day After" was broadcast nationally, there were often discussions among people about what they would do in the event of a global thermonuclear war. Would you try to run? Would you have a bomb shelter and supplies? Would you just sit and relax and wait for the bombs to come? Would you even want to survive? Many people might opt to be vaporized instantly, rather than wander around in the smoldering aftermath.

 

[Alien826]

Great post!

This is a very real thing to many people. I'll jump straight to coping strategies.

If you love other people, love yourself too. You need to take care of yourself to have the strength to help others. You wouldn't set out on a long journey without making sure your car was in good condition. WARNING - this can be used to justify selfishness. "Charity starts at home".

Divide the things that concern you into two categories. Things you can do something about, and those that you can't. If you can do something, like donating to the political party of your choice, do it. Then stop obsessing about it. You've done your best. Things you can't affect, feel sad by all means but not so it affects what you do for things in category one. Accept your limitations, but feel good about what you can do.

There's a story of a small boy walking down a beach. There are hundreds of starfish that have been stranded by the retreating tide. He is picking them up one by one and throwing them into the ocean. A passer by asks why he does this as he has no chance of saving them all. He points to the one in his hand and says "I can save this one".

There is one thing you do have control over and that is your own mind. You can't change the world (much) but you can control your reaction to it. How is a huge subject that I won't explore here.

Allow yourself to be sad and don't judge yourself. If you feel bad about feeling bad you've just added another problem to your list.

Do things to take your mind off it all. I love music and it gives me much peace. But don't withdraw so much that you forget the things you can help with.

 

[F1fan]

For me as a white male, I have little to worry about directly. I do have a house in a neighborhood that is gentrified and within a mile of lower income parts of town. Crime has been increasing everywhere, but I suspect if republicans regain power and follow through on some of their threats (like not raising the debt ceiling if they can't cut the budget) then there will be more uncertainty and turmoil. As much as republicans are running on rising crime right now I see their political approach likely to make crime worse. Republicans are notorious for cutting social investment and funding, and typically hostile towards minorities and marginalized groups. I have concerns. So I am finishing my house renovation and selling some time before the 2024 election. If that goes to the republicans, or if it doesn't and republicans pull their threats of challnging election results, then I predict unrest and instability, both socially and the economy. I want my financial affairs in order by then.

I do expect some election drama in a few weeks, and if not a decisive democrat virctory, there may be election reform that will allow republicans to reject votes in democratic hot spots. The end of a stable democracy will likely occur then, and the USA will be much like Russia. It will still function, but there will be serious stress and a collapse of freedom for many marginalized people. That will cause distress and suffering.

One thing to consider is that if republicans do take over in local and federal offices then the MAGAs will have no boogeyman to balme, and if things aren't magically improved the citizens will blame the MAGAs and republicans as a whole. The moderate voter will look to democrats as a better option as they did with Biden over Trump.

A part of me wants republicans to win congress so the people can see what they have to offer before the 2024 elections. What republicans are offering is very little. More tax cuts for the wealthy, more cuts to vital social services that help maintain stability and balance.

 

[Curious George]

Is this an issue for some here? Was it and it has since resolved somewhat or entirely? What are your coping strategies if you are suffering because of your empathy?

It seems you are discussing this on a macro level (with all the ills of the world burdening one), but I think that it is noteworthy that this very much happens on an individual relationship basis. That is one can experience compassion fatigue with respect to a particular matter or in a particular relationship. If you have a family member or friend who struggles with addiction or excessively complains, you have likely experienced compassion fatigue.

someone already noted self-care. It is important to keep your take full, so you have the energy to address others needs. I think another good coping mechanism is reflection. Reflection can help us identify our biases and create measured responses. Lastly, I think it is important to know one’s limits. If you know your limits you can set healthy reasonable boundaries that helps avoid getting to the point where you are experiencing compassion fatigue.

 

[JustGeorge]

This term originally comes from the medical field and refers to a reaction caused by some combination of emotional (and often physical) exhaustion from overwork, exposure to excessive and prolonged suffering in others, and a sense of powerlessness. It manifests as a relative shutdown of empathy as a defensive mechanism - kind of emotional numbing. We saw this on a large scale with nurses and doctors during the peak of pandemic.

These times are rife for compassion fatigue. We just witnessed a pandemic. Throw in Ukraine, mass shootings, and those displaced by extreme weather. Throw in babies unable to get formula and those threatened by financial insolvency and homelessness. Throw in the loss of abortion rights and the concern about the well-being of pregnant women. The bees are dying. Throw in the threat of nuclear war, and the other consequences of extreme weather including the suffering of the beasts, and it is easy to see why feeling in an empath might shut down partially or completely in self-defense.

I try to deal with it through acceptance (Kubler-Ross' fifth stage of grief), a skill I learned working for hospice. The worst that can happen may happen, but it doesn't have to be an excessively emotional ride.

Getting back to hospice, those who could not accept the terminal nature of a loved one's illness suffered much more as they witnessed the ineluctable ongoing deterioration of the terminally ill loved one than those who had accepted the overwhelmingly likely fact that this process cannot be stopped, the optimists always expecting a miracle, never getting it, their emotions repeatedly dashed against the rocks with every decline. The others also suffered, but less so.

That's what my experience of watching America die was like until I accepted it. It's OK if America dies, because it looks like it needs to go on hospice now. It's OK if the Republicans regain control, because they probably will. This upcoming election is critical, and liberal patriots are very worried about the outcome. Not I. I have preferences, but I expect the right to eventually prevail soon and steal America's wealth for the few. Oh, well. Que sera sera.

Is this an issue for some here? Was it and it has since resolved somewhat or entirely? What are your coping strategies if you are suffering because of your empathy?

I moved out at 17. Mom and Dad got divorced. Mom didn't have room for me. Dad was emotionally abusive. I was half a year from 18; guess it was time to go. So I did.

Obviously, I needed a job. The first place that called back was a group home organization(for the handicapped) in the area. That was my first, and only, job.

In a job that most people burned out after two years, I stayed on over 10 years on schedule, a few more years on call. Yes, it wore me the hell out. Not physically; physically, it was easy. But watching the folks grow worse, and worse over a period of years... It didn't do me any good. My anxiety and depression were a mess(though there were more factors going on that the job, to be sure)/ I stayed because I needed the money, not because I enjoyed the job.

When my first son showed some developmental delays, I was in denial at first. I tried not to think about it, but in the back of my head, I'd think "I deal with this at work, I don't want to deal with it at home, too". I think when autism struck the first time, it was harder for me because of that. Not because it was autism, but because I didn't want to deal with these things 24/7. I didn't want my life to reflect nothing but care of folks with disabilities. So, I decided we'd live a good life, anyways. We'd deal with problems as they came, but I wasn't going to make this my identity.

And then my second son started showing the signs. More profoundly than the first. By this time, I had stopped working in order to care for the home, husband, and boys. I handled it really well, when it became apparent that I would have two autistic sons. But I had one bad night, when the reality finally hit me. I remember panicking, and feeling frantically like 'work' was following me. It passed, but that one night was very scary.

I could tell stories about the years of work, challenges, and victories I've had to go through with these two kids, but that's not the purpose of this thread, so I won't. But I will say dealing with these particular situations has made me a hell of an actor. I have to deal with all kinds of situations, and react abnormally, because otherwise the kids will run with the reactions. When my oldest has the beginning signs of an anger meltdown, his lips become unleased, and he says all kinds of vile things. I know he doesn't mean it, and that its a reaction he's still learning to control(and making progress), but while I want to cringe, and tell him not to talk to his mother like that, I do a really good imitation of Fred Sanford having 'the big one'. Why? Because the bravado makes him laugh, and he comes off of it. When the middle one is giggling and running away in a store, I morph into a naughty toddler and do something similar, because then he frets, and feels he has to take care of me(and he stays with us), rather than running up and down the isles in the grocery store at top speed.

Acting, acting, acting. I am so bushed. My husband has been having some personal/mental health issues in the last year as well, and has also needed me to be 'delicate' with him, too. More acting. After a really, really bad week, and a pretty bad night last night, I didn't feel like waking up with him(after he'd kept me up all night ranting his unhappiness) to pretend our longhaired cat was a turban he needed to wear to work, but I did, to keep his mood up, in hopes today will be better. Because my day is only as good as the moods of the people around me. Thankfully, the toddler keeps himself pretty upbeat. Few challenges there.

But yes, I am fatigued. I'm still holding on, and I go through up and down cycles. I think that's normal.

So when I look in the newspaper and see the horrors of what's going on, I feel these 'ups and downs' are normal, too. Do I like them? No. But when I look at history, nations rise, nations fall. I have a fascination with clothing and its cycles, too. In some regions where you most always see woman clad in burqas, mini skirts were the fad 60 years ago. Things come, things go. Pandemics and epidemics happen, too. Never pleasant, but they're usually far enough between generations that they feel like a new thing when they arrive. My great great grandmother, who was long dead by the time I came around, used to tell my grandmother(when she was a child) about all the coffins going down the road during the Spanish flu. This is all temporary. The good is temporary. The bad is temporary. And there's not a damned thing I can do about it.

So when I'm leafing through the paper, and I see something like yet another shooting, or more mention of wars(there always seems to be one somewhere), my eyes will moisten for a moment. And then I'll flip the page. Because I can't help. I can't change it. I am a modest woman of modest means, and there's nothing I can do. I just keep working with my family, keep working with my house, making my own pocket of the cosmos(however small) the best I can, because it is my dharma to do so(I think you and I have talked about dharma before). One day, I'll be gone, and none of this will have mattered. I don't really matter. It should make me sad, but it doesn't. I find it all a relief. Things just keep going on, with its joys and tragedies, like it always has. We(humanity as a whole) need to do our best to uphold our own dharma, to make this world, though it, too, is just a spec of dust in the cosmos, the best it can be. But based on the patterns of how things have always seemed to work, I have no reason to feel things aren't exactly as they should be.

 

[joe1776]

....Is this an issue for some here? Was it and it has since resolved somewhat or entirely? What are your coping strategies if you are suffering because of your empathy?

I bear in mind that there's ample evidence that, as a long-term trend, things are getting better for humanity. So, short-term problems don't concern me much. I'm optimistic about the future.

 

[It Aint Necessarily So]

I've taken a more detached approach to things over the past couple of decades. It's not that I stopped caring or even became numb, but most of the problems America faces today are self-inflicted and caused by our own excesses, recklessness, and myopia.

I agree with that, but when I go there, I find myself not just indifferent, but beginning to think in terms the victim deserving his plight, which is also a coping mechanism, but not a pretty one. Why worry about something when you can say, who cares? This is how I have dealt with anti-vaxxers and Republican voters rather than see them as victims of indoctrination, whichis a sympathetic view that does nothing to mitigate compassion fatigue.

Of course, in all fairness, I would concede that we haven't yet reached the point of no return. America's fall is not yet a "done deal." The lights are still burning, the internet is still turned on, there's still food at the grocery stores, gas at the gas stations - even if there might be some signs of shortages, supply chain issues, etc.

The future I see for Americans under Republican rule is one more like of the Mexican people around me - much less economic opportunity and spending power, and therefore fewer options. This will increase angst as Americans discover that they're going to need to downsize their lives. Much of the remainder of life will suffer degradation as well, as infrastructure is allowed to rot, freedoms are contracted, racial tensions deliberately inflamed, workplace and environment become progressively less safe. People will not understand what is happening to them or why (some still don't understand why their rivers are dry and daytimes oppressively hot), so, they'll blame immigrants and the Democrats and whatever the media tells them to believe, but never their own uninsightful voting.

But here's how it proceeds. At first, the $10,000 annual vacation on a cruise ship becomes a road trip to a nearby national park. The $225 mani-pedi for the $60,000 wedding becomes a luxury available to far fewer. Less eating out, making clothes do longer, keeping the car and dishwasher running when one might have replaced them before, maybe not three streaming services. Some might opt out of parenthood just because of the expense. People won't generally make these changes proactively because they won't see the need until they can't pay the rent, so it will be more painful when they discover to their great surprise that they can't afford the life they were used to. Most won't see this coming (they voted for Republicans to bring down prices) or change their spending habits proactively, so, there will be a lot of extra resentment and theft.

But they'll still cast ballots even if they mean nothing, and be free to walk the streets without showing papers. It won't look to the like the country has been retooled by the people they trusted and voted for to them.

There is one thing you do have control over and that is your own mind.

Yes, but not everybody.

One thing to consider is that if republicans do take over in local and federal offices then the MAGAs will have no boogeyman to blame

So, they'll likely come to their senses and blame themselves for voting for Republicans then, right? Just kidding. You know who those people are and how they think. It'll still be somebody else's fault even if they have to blame Satan. Check Hunter's laptop and the deep state. Or George Soros. And don't forget Antifa.

I bear in mind that there's ample evidence that, as a long-term trend, things are getting better for humanity. So, short-term problems don't concern me much. I'm optimistic about the future.

OK. That might be helpful if compassion fatigue is or becomes an issue for you.

 

[F1fan]

So, they'll likely come to their senses and blame themselves for voting for Republicans then, right? Just kidding. You know who those people are and how they think. It'll still be somebody else's fault even if they have to blame Satan. Check Hunter's laptop and the deep state. Or George Soros. And don't forget Antifa.

We are only talking about 10% of the more moderate of the right wing voters. We are seeing the democrats running for office right now losing ground in polling, and it's these middle of the road voters who is the audience. Republican rhetoic thrives when they are the underdog, but when they are in power, who can they blame? They need someone to blame, as they aren't exactly good with policy positions to run on. I think republicans are making gains right now because they are using heavy doses of rhetoric, a lot of it exploitive and untrue. Republicans know how to whip up fear. That is their one true expertise. Whether citizens are smart enough to not buy into the crap is the question.

If republicans take back congress they will still have Biden to beat up on, but that can only go so far. It will be a long 2 years from 22 to 24.

 

[Alien826]

Interesting coincidence.

After posting here I went to join my wife who was watching CNN. After a while we almost simultaneously had the same thought. We were fed up with the constant stream of political opinion (can't call it news) we were being flooded with on a daily basis. It's mostly speculation, but they have to have something to talk about I guess. Nevertheless, every time someone says that the Repubs are likely to win my heart sinks, and when someone says something optimistic about the Dem's chances I feel a bit better.

We decided that we would not watch or read any "election" commentary until it's over. OK, I probably won't be able to resist watching the results on the evening of election day, but maybe I can start a bit later to skip over the "Well, we have 1% of the results from Somewheretown let's go to our panel and see what they think this indicates" part.

We do still want to keep up with other news though. We both have news feeds on our phones, so I've suggested that we scan the headlines every day and read anything that seems interesting, so long as it's not politics.

We'll see how it goes.

 

[RestlessSoul]

It's not just the USA, the whole world is in crisis. The age of peace and plenty, only available in a few privileged corners of the earth in any case, looks to be over. It was short lived and a bit of an outlier in any case. My grandparents lived through two World Wars and a Great depression. My father's father was in the workhouse (look it up) as a teenager, then as a young adult spent four years in the trenches in Flanders, up to his neck in mud and guts serving the British Empire (somewhat ironically for an Irishman). You want peace, freedom and justice? The most we can ever hope to do, is embody these principles in our own lives, along with love and compassion. As for the world, que sera sera.

 

[Twilight Hue]

I see it all as nature and evolution. I don't put in as much emotion and empathy as I used to where it gets extreme as nature itself is as indifferent as much as its caring and loving.

I see things a vying for a natural equilibrium, or balance, of which everything has a part or role in maintaining harmony where nothing is truly good or truly bad. A balance of forces in other words.

It's a reason why I changed my moniker to Twilight Hue, where it's not light, but not dark either.

 

[wellwisher]

This term originally comes from the medical field and refers to a reaction caused by some combination of emotional (and often physical) exhaustion from overwork, exposure to excessive and prolonged suffering in others, and a sense of powerlessness. It manifests as a relative shutdown of empathy as a defensive mechanism - kind of emotional numbing. We saw this on a large scale with nurses and doctors during the peak of pandemic.

These times are rife for compassion fatigue. We just witnessed a pandemic. Throw in Ukraine, mass shootings, and those displaced by extreme weather. Throw in babies unable to get formula and those threatened by financial insolvency and homelessness. Throw in the loss of abortion rights and the concern about the well-being of pregnant women. The bees are dying. Throw in the threat of nuclear war, and the other consequences of extreme weather including the suffering of the beasts, and it is easy to see why feeling in an empath might shut down partially or completely in self-defense.

I try to deal with it through acceptance (Kubler-Ross' fifth stage of grief), a skill I learned working for hospice. The worst that can happen may happen, but it doesn't have to be an excessively emotional ride.

Getting back to hospice, those who could not accept the terminal nature of a loved one's illness suffered much more as they witnessed the ineluctable ongoing deterioration of the terminally ill loved one than those who had accepted the overwhelmingly likely fact that this process cannot be stopped, the optimists always expecting a miracle, never getting it, their emotions repeatedly dashed against the rocks with every decline. The others also suffered, but less so.

That's what my experience of watching America die was like until I accepted it. It's OK if America dies, because it looks like it needs to go on hospice now. It's OK if the Republicans regain control, because they probably will. This upcoming election is critical, and liberal patriots are very worried about the outcome. Not I. I have preferences, but I expect the right to eventually prevail soon and steal America's wealth for the few. Oh, well. Que sera sera.

Is this an issue for some here? Was it and it has since resolved somewhat or entirely? What are your coping strategies if you are suffering because of your empathy?

The Political left came upon with a solution to this. This solution has been called virtue signaling. This is where you say you care, in public places, but don't do anything about the problem. The object of the game is to make sure you signal your virtue loudly in public, so others can see you have virtue. But behind the scenes, you go about your life or you deficit spend with other people's money, to solve the problem, you pretended to directly care about. Someone who is genuine would walk the walk and not just talk and talk. They would volunteer or donate. The virtue signaler talks publicly about how much they care.

Virtue signally has spilled over into other areas, such as climate change. The leaders speak about the need to lower the carbon foot print, while flying with gas guzzling private jets with large carbon footprints. It is do as I say, and not as I do. To them just talking; virtual signally, is so important, that they have done their part; displayed strong emotions like an actor. Now they are free to violate their rehearsed compassion, since the problems are not as large, as their virtue signal performance. We are supposed to think their acting is magical. I do not see such people burnt out with compassion since it was acting.

 

[Sand Dancer]

For me as a white male, I have little to worry about directly. I do have a house in a neighborhood that is gentrified and within a mile of lower income parts of town. Crime has been increasing everywhere, but I suspect if republicans regain power and follow through on some of their threats (like not raising the debt ceiling if they can't cut the budget) then there will be more uncertainty and turmoil. As much as republicans are running on rising crime right now I see their political approach likely to make crime worse. Republicans are notorious for cutting social investment and funding, and typically hostile towards minorities and marginalized groups. I have concerns. So I am finishing my house renovation and selling some time before the 2024 election. If that goes to the republicans, or if it doesn't and republicans pull their threats of challnging election results, then I predict unrest and instability, both socially and the economy. I want my financial affairs in order by then.

I do expect some election drama in a few weeks, and if not a decisive democrat virctory, there may be election reform that will allow republicans to reject votes in democratic hot spots. The end of a stable democracy will likely occur then, and the USA will be much like Russia. It will still function, but there will be serious stress and a collapse of freedom for many marginalized people. That will cause distress and suffering.

One thing to consider is that if republicans do take over in local and federal offices then the MAGAs will have no boogeyman to balme, and if things aren't magically improved the citizens will blame the MAGAs and republicans as a whole. The moderate voter will look to democrats as a better option as they did with Biden over Trump.

A part of me wants republicans to win congress so the people can see what they have to offer before the 2024 elections. What republicans are offering is very little. More tax cuts for the wealthy, more cuts to vital social services that help maintain stability and balance.

I don't think they mind if we become some sort of developing nation. The end (OT theocracy) justifies the means (making people miserable, poor, sick, fearful and unsafe), since those things increase religious participation. Those who care will get burned out. Watching the poor getting poorer and the sick getting sicker will affect those with compassion. Meanwhile the Religious Right will go along their merry way.

 

[F1fan]

I don't think they mind if we become some sort of developing nation. The end (OT theocracy) justifies the means (making people miserable, poor, sick, fearful and unsafe), since those things increase religious participation. Those who care will get burned out. Watching the poor getting poorer and the sick getting sicker will affect those with compassion. Meanwhile the Religious Right will go along their merry way.

There are conservative Christians who insist that thre should be no government aid given to those in poverty, that these people should only be helped through charity. Well, there's not enough charity as it is, and cutting off resources to the impoverished even more would be deadly. They don't care. they are idealistic and their compassion is completely mitigated. Republicans thrive when there is social unrest because the middle and upper class want protection, and the right would rather spend money on police and prisons than helping impoverished citizens. It creates an "enemy" that unifies the fearful.

 

[syo]

I don't know compassion. It's ridiculous.

 

[Stevicus]

I agree with that, but when I go there, I find myself not just indifferent, but beginning to think in terms the victim deserving his plight, which is also a coping mechanism, but not a pretty one. Why worry about something when you can say, who cares? This is how I have dealt with anti-vaxxers and Republican voters rather than see them as victims of indoctrination, whichis a sympathetic view that does nothing to mitigate compassion fatigue.

I think much of it is due to the ideals and platforms of the people they elect - and oftentimes this overlaps between the two parties. While the responsibility still belongs to the voters, I also recognize that many problems emanate from the structure and notions surrounding party politics which ends up giving people two mediocre choices between the lesser of two evils.

I've also found, over the course of the past few decades, that people don't really want anything to change - or they resist change. Even those who claim they want change end up poo-pooing or rejecting out of hand any and all genuine proposals for change.

People argue too much just for the sake of arguing. A lot of people say they want change, yet they shoot down other people's ideas while coming up with none of their own.

It's like being on a ship heading towards an iceberg, yet the crew are fighting and squabbling in the wheelhouse because they can't agree on which way to turn.

 

[It Aint Necessarily So]

The Political left came upon with a solution to this.

I don't recall seeing a post from you that whatever the discussion was about that wasn't a partisan MAGA rant. Also, your posting has also always been drive-by, meaning that you leave a post and disappear for good without addressing the responses. How shall we understand this behavior? Who or what is the source of this, and with what agenda? Domo arigato, Mr. Wellwisher.

 

[Ella S.]

I mostly see people as biochemical neural nets wired to meat tubes through their nerves.

Empathy used to bother me when I was a child. I would weep at every car accident covered by the local news stations. In time, I have seen enough corpses to realize that we are just flesh. I have seen enough of human behavior to realize that we are not really that different from the common fruit fly; we act with the same instincts and have the same variation in our personalities and preferences. Even I am merely a product of my genetic dispositions dictating the choices I make from the options presented to me by my environment.

At that point I had two options. I could dehumanize people and live in peace or I could anthropomorphize living creatures and despair when they do exactly what nature demands of them; suffer in often brutal ways at the hands of callous natural forces.

I could cling to some myth about the uniqueness of humanity by expanding it to include more and more human-like beings or embrace that we are merely products of natural laws, subject to the same life cycles as clouds and stars, unstable assemblies of organic chemicals. Our deaths are not that different from an avalanche coming to rest at the bottom of a mountain or a computer being bricked.

Death and suffering is inevitable. Not just the death and suffering of others, but my own. I accept that every day when I choose to keep living. This is how life has always been and how it will continue to be, at least for now. The problem is when we think things should be different from how they must be. There is only one reality and it follows the laws of physics, not the laws invented by people.

I'm not saying that we shouldn't do our part to help one another or that we should abandon morality. Morality is meaningless when we allow ourselves to be conditioned to passively expect it from the world rather than actively give it meaning through our choices. Empathy is ultimately a form of cognitive dissonance and it is resolvable through rationality.

Of course, many people would rather suffer than let go of their empathy. In those cases, they should accept suffering as the consequence of their choice and not look for some impossible resolution which allows them to have their cake and eat it, too. I understand that the perspective I've outlined here can seem bleak and inhuman, but reality isn't human and doesn't care to make itself appear less bleak to us. The answer isn't to retreat back into our mythology, but to accept the universe for what it is so that we are no longer blindsided when it acts according to its own nature.