Both sides must strongly identify with "their" religion in this case.
But some Americans do not understand that a person's "religion" in many other "cultures" is more, sometimes much more, than some set of scripture or dogma ... it is also a sense of community or klan or even nation. And this "community" concept sometimes even divides into "tribes" different circles WITHIN THE SAME RELIGION.
Now, as I discuss this, I am assuming you are an American - but I could be wrong. So if I am wrong, what I am about to explain may make no sense to you, perhaps you should dismiss it. But ...
Back to this discussion that with some, their religion isn't just a religion, or even much of a religion at all but a Clan or Community. Let me give the example of what I knew first hand, Angola. We will put it in the context of your religion, Christianity. So in the North-West part of Angola is Cabinda. There are a lot of Christians there. Now they have a "community" that is about the food that is eaten, the way you entertain yourself, family and guests. You have your own calendar. How you treat your in-laws and the elderly and your parents. Certain holidays, many actually about local traditions and under the guise of religion but about "we do this arts and crafts, and eat these gourds, and then the men meet here to drink paddy, the women make these colorful clothes that are green and red and then we show off the clothes at a meeting where some guy talks about the Jesus"... what does most of what I just said about gourds and green-red-with-BIG-hat have to do with Christianity?
Zero. It has to do with COMMUNITY CONSCIOUSNESS but there IS this guise of religion. But mostly it is "bigger" than Christianity while also being more NARROW in the sense of "I am Damba Christian from Cabinda and we eat a big roast but not bat like those in Luanda".
Then South and East of Cabinda way off there in the same Angola, there are these Christians. They don't racially look the same as in Cabinda. Like a Korean isn't a Chinese. The Cabinda has their name for their Christianity, and around Luanda they have a different name. Both Christians - but they don't call each others religion the same word. Luanda area, they have a big party where you must spend a lot of money on the appetizers at the party to be their Christian. Forget paddy, where is the Scotch? No big hats on these ladies, you better not be fat either like those up Cabinda way to be this Christian, though Luandans are not saying those other gals are fat but better you are not. And no BIG hats. The boy must eat this bush meat when 14, but it might be ok to eat a steak instead, but if you cannot afford a party it is ok to eat a monkey but a bat is for peasants. Now - how much money do you have to marry my beautiful daughter who works in a government office? We Luandans are the best Christians who dance."
You see? Different but strong community under the guise of religion.
For YOU the American, the Christian girl, you probably see religion in a pair of glasses that sees this Church, the preist or preacher is talking about Jesus as salvation or something from a scripture. You don't see, however, your religion as "our Uncle from Wisconsin" and "we like two eggs for breakfest, and every June we go to the car races in Gooper because we are good Christians and have you ever had grandma's Chicken pie?"...
No. Your "community" isn't your religion when you say "my religion". You don't say "my religion is the parade on yadda date for Miss Cheese Queen". No. You don't say that - BUT THERE ARE PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD WHERE THAT IS WHAT RELIGION MEANS WHEN YOU SAY RELIGION.
Take the Panjabi Hindu. What is your religion, you ask the Panjabi? Oh, basmati rice and beat the dol (a type of drum). What?, you ask. Beat the dol? Yes, says the Panjabi, builds your muscle in case you beat the guy who cheats you on the fare, and praise our local Goddess (name)"... But what about the Gujarati Hindu? Oh, Guji. We greet each other in London if talking a jog and we bump into another Guji. But not the Panjabi. Then we say, is your daugher in school or married? This is our Hinduism. We are Guji Culture and we are the BEST!
Understand? Probably not. But you better if you are going to marry this guy. He sounds like CULTURE guy, not "religion" guy. You said he is a Muslim. Ok. Which? Shia? Suni? Other? Ok. WHICH REGION OF TURKEY (or Iraq, or is it UAE, Egypt?)?
This isn't just about Koran.
No. It is about what is the shape of the tea cup. Is the bread like THIS ... or THAT.
I think he is CULTURE Muslim, not religion. Tribe.
Syria is a Nation of Tribes, like Iraq. Raise your son as Muslim means he will need to visit granny these times and you must eat this bread with raisins in it to be Muslim of Yadda.
Undedstand?
So, that may be great for you. But understand, "Muslim" doesn't mean Quran. I can see it by instinct. It means eating THIS bread, and dancing THIS way or maybe you DONT dance with others but your sister-in-law from Wuranistan Tuqqa.
I ... excuse me ... dont think you know this. You have American sunglasses on that you see rose color. You think Muslim means "go to mosque, hear Quran" and your son gets this or that in mosque on day x and y and .... NOOO! NOT THAT! It means your Mother-In-Law is YOUR GOD! THIS is Babbalaba Muslim or else you are a traitor of the Babbalabaa CULTURE. Understand, Amerika? You don't have to be BORN in Babbalabaa to BE one. If you worship your Mother-In-Law and give her almond candy YOU can be Babbalabaa Muslim.
Else, we will get you girl for marrying my son! You don't know hell until that day. Eat almonds or die a BAD MUSLIM.
So, I could be wrong. But... this tells me... don't marry him. Because you are too provincial to understand the provincial ways of the provincial world. You are not a citizen of the world like me. So you do not understand the provincial ways of THE 10,000 TRIBES.
