• Welcome to Religious Forums, a friendly forum to discuss all religions in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to get access to the following site features:
    • Reply to discussions and create your own threads.
    • Our modern chat room. No add-ons or extensions required, just login and start chatting!
    • Access to private conversations with other members.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon!

Are you living the life you want?

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Are you living the life you want? Are you living the life you chose? I guess if you are happy with your life you probably don’t think about this much, but what about people who are not happy with their lives? What about people who wish their lives were different? Have you ever tried to make any major changes in your life? Do you feel stuck, as if you really have no free will to change? Are you ashamed or embarrassed to admit everything is not just perfect on this forum, as if it is somehow YOUR fault?

I’m not ashamed or embarrassed, because I know it is not my fault things have turned out this way since I have spent most of my life trying to improve my life while also doing what I believed would benefit others, ever since I went into recovery 37 years ago. However, I believe that free will is very limited and much of what happens in life is preordained by God. What do you think?

I think about this often and I am at a turning point so I am thinking about it a lot right now. I might have to make some changes that will greatly impact my life and I might choose to make some changes that will greatly impact my life. Sometimes I feel as if God is guiding me along in the direction He wants me to go, so will God guide me through these changes if I have to make them or choose to make them?

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

On another note, I know that if I followed my own selfish desires I would not be living the way I am living. I would be thinking about “what I want” rather than what God wants for me.

I want to do God’s will and I keep thinking of what Jesus said:

Luke 9:23-24 And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.

John 12:24-25 Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit. He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal.

Matthew 6:19-21 Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

My religion has the same teachings, so that further corroborates what Jesus said. I often wonder how Christians interpret these verses when I listen to Christian radio and they are talking about how they love their lives and all the things they love about this world, food, drink, etc. Do I take these verses too seriously? Why would Jesus say what He did not mean?

Sometimes it is really hard to not think of myself and what I want, but so far what I want more is to live the way my religion teaches me to live, which is the same as what Jesus taught. Either that or I feel it would be better for me to drop out of my religion and start living for myself and all the world has to offer, because I don’t want to be a hypocrite. I could start living for myself right now if I wanted to and if I had free will.

However, I am not sure I want to live for myself, and even if I wanted to I don’t know if I have free will to change the way I have been living for so long and set out on an entirely new path. If this is the life that God has preordained for me I don’t really have a choice. However, even if God preordained some things I don’t believe that everything is preordained as I believe we are free to make some of our own choices, particularly our moral choices.

If I sound somewhat conflicted that is because I am. I want to love God and follow the teachings of Jesus and Baha’u’llah but another part of me wants nothing to do with God or religion owing to a lot of hurt they have caused me. However, it is not as if I love the worldly things of this life either, but since everyone else seems to love worldly things, I feel very much alone.

I am sorry this is so long, but my life situation has finally come to a head. I try to be completely self-sufficient but no man is an island.

Thanks for listening, Trailblazer. :)
 
Last edited:

PoetPhilosopher

Veteran Member
It's a difficult question indeed. I haven't touched Abrahamic religion in the last couple of years due to feeling what it could offer me personally, as not outweighing the negative things I may experience as part of being Abrahamic. It may sound selfish, but being transgender and Democrat just amplifies the problem, I feel, if I were to participate in fellowship with other believers and such.
 

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
It's a difficult question indeed. I haven't touched Abrahamic religion in the last couple of years due to feeling what it could offer me personally, as not outweighing the negative things I may experience as part of being Abrahamic. It may sound selfish, but being transgender and Democrat just amplifies the problem, I feel, if I were to participate in fellowship with other believers and such.
I guess you were referring to Christianity. If so, I can understand how you might not feel you fit in, at least not with the fundamentalist Christians, but many liberal Christians are democrats.:) I don't know how they feel about transgender, that is a whole subject in itself, but I do know that the Baha'i Faith does not discriminate.

Can Transgender People Be Baha’is?
 

PureX

Veteran Member
"The life I want" does not compute. It's a prospect I would never even consider. I can't imagine what value such a consideration could have.

If you're asking about making my own life better given what I have; that I could understand contemplating. In fact, I just started a new long term project hoping to do exactly that.
 

sun rise

The world is on fire
Premium Member
so will God guide me through these changes if I have to make them or choose to make them?

This to me becomes a very subtle and complex question for me based on my life. In some situations the answer was yes and sometimes apparently no. One work decision I made appeared to be utterly wrong and led to me being fired. I was told later that I had to make that choice to balance karma from a previous life. So, yes, I was guided in that situation but it did not seem so at the time.

If I sound somewhat conflicted that is because I am. I want to love God and follow the teachings of Jesus and Baha’u’llah but another part of me wants nothing to do with God or religion owing to a lot of hurt they have caused me. However, it is not as if I love the worldly things of this life either, but since everyone else seems to love worldly things, I feel very much alone.

That might be the experience of what is called the "void" or "dark night" in spiritual literature. I'm not sure if this is your state or not, but if it is, maybe it will help:

A man sits
by a tomb,
head bowed,
lost in thought.

Tears
at a life ended.
No where to go,
nothing to do.

Former joy
is now ashes.
Former life
is now silent.

Surrendering,
he merges
with the cold, still earth.

Dawn's mist
invokes quiet and peace.
Existence is an eternity
of patient waiting.

Slowly felt:
dawn's earth warming light.

From the tomb,
a seed opens;
a flower begins
its slow sunward journey.
 

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
Nowadays, I'm generally unattached to this life. There really is no life I want. My life is what it is, and I'm good with letting karma float it down.
I think this is a very good attitude to have, to accept life as it is and let it unfold.

I am not really not attached to this life but perhaps I am sometimes unduly influenced by people who are and sometimes I think that maybe they are happy because of things of this world, and wonder if I would be happier if I also pursued those things. However another part of me, the part that dictates my behavior, knows that those things are just transient and do not matter at all.

I believe in predestination so if I am going to be a Baha'i and follow the teachings I think I should accept what God has destined for me even if it is not what I want. I guess that is somewhat similar letting karma float it down.

I do not believe that everything that happens to us in this world is irrevocably predestined. I believe that some of our destiny is impending and is dependent upon the free will decisions that we make which determine our destiny. Often life throws things at us and we are forced to make decisions and I am in that situation right now.
 

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
I too am living the live I want.
However, I see room for improvement.
I think there is always room for improvement. Otherwise we are in a state of stasis.
I cannot imagine any life in this world that is perfect, although I believe that the afterlife has that potential.
 

Trailblazer

Veteran Member
"The life I want" does not compute. It's a prospect I would never even consider. I can't imagine what value such a consideration could have.
Since I have not contemplated what "I want" for myself for most of my life, it is not something I think about either, but since I am being faced with making some decisions and that is why I am thinking about it.
If you're asking about making my own life better given what I have; that I could understand contemplating. In fact, I just started a new long term project hoping to do exactly that.
That sounds interesting. Please share how you plan to do that if you care to. I am not very good at planning and projects, as I normally just take life as it comes.
 

We Never Know

No Slack
Unless you don't care about electricity and water and sewer and garbage internet and TV, I don't see how you can ever avoid having some bills. ;) Those are the only bills I have since I owe no money to anyone.

Right. But for most to live the life they want, it has bills.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Wanderer From Afar
Premium Member
Hell, no. I'm not living the life I want. I hate my stupid job working for a corrupt greedy corporation where the managers are breaking all kinds of rules and having inappropriate relationships, and they work you like a dog (to start with my complaints about that dump). I hate my apartment building that is run by some corrupt organization that allows a violent psycho to get away with abusing the other tenants and even having the SWAT called on for his ***. I hate that I'm poor and struggling but surrounded by oblivious, obnoxious rich idiots who have no idea what it's like to struggle to survive in this world, while they drive their $100,000 cars to and from their multimillion dollar homes, etc. and still think they have the right to look down on people like me.

I could go on but it doesn't matter.
 
Top