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Anyone else feel this?

VoidCat

Pronouns: he/him/they/them
Here's a question I have- anyone else ever wonder if they're faking something they know they arent? Sometimes I feel as if I am faking being autistic for attention. But then like I'll like start stimming like crazy outta excitement or have a meltdown cuz of sensory issues. I am wonder how does this happen? After all if you are faking something youd know it. You wouldn't be wondering if you are. And I know I'm not faking. So why does it sometimes feel as if I am?
 

The Hammer

[REDACTED]
Premium Member
Here's a question I have- anyone else ever wonder if they're faking something they know they arent? Sometimes I feel as if I am faking being autistic for attention. But then like I'll like start stimming like crazy outta excitement or have a meltdown cuz of sensory issues. I am wonder how does this happen? After all if you are faking something youd know it. You wouldn't be wondering if you are.

It sounds almost like Imposter syndrome. I feel like that about my mental health all the time. Especially when I was younger.
 

ADigitalArtist

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
With regards to mental illness and disabilities imposter snydrome has to do with things that are invisible to the eyes not seeming wholly real. You know you can't convince other people of the experience of your inner turmoil so you struggle with the idea that someone, somewhere out there might not believe you when you say you're struggling.
Hopefully you have validating people in your life who see the evidence of your struggles and support you. But if nothing else remember that if you find yourself stimming and dealing with autism related anxieties even when nobody is around, it can hardly be for attention seeking, can it?
 

Shadow Wolf

Certified People sTabber
What exactly is that?
Impostor syndrome - Wikipedia
Impostor syndrome (also known as impostor phenomenon, impostorism, fraud syndrome or the impostor experience) is a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their skills, talents or accomplishments and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".[1] Despite external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds, and do not deserve all they have achieved. Individuals with impostorism incorrectly attribute their success to luck, or interpret it as a result of deceiving others into thinking they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves to be.[2] While early research focused on the prevalence among high-achieving women, impostor syndrome has been recognized to affect both men and women equally.[1][3]

Impostor syndrome also occurs in the context of mental illness and its treatment. Certain individuals may see themselves as less ill (less depressed, less anxious) than their peers or other mentally ill people, citing their lack of severe symptoms as the indication of no or a minor underlying issue. People with this form do not seek help for their issues, seeing their problems as not worthy of psychiatric attention.[4][5]
 

Unveiled Artist

Veteran Member
Here's a question I have- anyone else ever wonder if they're faking something they know they arent? Sometimes I feel as if I am faking being autistic for attention. But then like I'll like start stimming like crazy outta excitement or have a meltdown cuz of sensory issues. I am wonder how does this happen? After all if you are faking something youd know it. You wouldn't be wondering if you are. And I know I'm not faking. So why does it sometimes feel as if I am?

I am 100% with you on that. I have epilepsy, seizure and had it for 28 years. I still have the small ones or the ones I don't go unconscious. Sometimes I'll be walking or so have you and get a flush and something that feels like anxiety/convulsions mixed. But since I've had them for so long, surgery, and great medication, I always think maybe I didn't have a seizure. Isn't seizures you're "supposed" to be unaware? I'm only unaware for probably two seconds from the time I have it to the time I'm on the ground.

It feels like I'm faking it when I can get up right after a seizure which majority of seizures, people are usually out of it. But then I think of where my seizure happened and patterns to tell if its something new or not. I usually know because my left side of my body hurts or my jaw from shaking. But I'm mostly aware that's why I keep thinking I'm faking. I talked with my therapist (I see her for something else) and she was saying anxiety is more you're out of breathe, panicky, and so forth. Seizures, if you're panicky it makes them worse. That and with seizures you don't have anxiety-related thoughts.

Seizures aren't characterized by stemming (I had to look that up), but sometimes I do-like rocking back and forth and such-when I'm just siting or something. My mother used to tell me to stop all the time. But I think that has more to do with my brain surgery and I don't have it much since I live outside my home.

Whether you're faking or not, you know your body. My friend told me "you're not depressed because you're aware"... I think you and I are just self-aware maybe because you've had autism for awhile (I assume?) and kinda got used to it.

I think if you're faking it, you would ... but I wouldn't say so. What would be the reason? I'd ask that.
 

darkskies

Active Member
Here's a question I have- anyone else ever wonder if they're faking something they know they arent? Sometimes I feel as if I am faking being autistic for attention. But then like I'll like start stimming like crazy outta excitement or have a meltdown cuz of sensory issues. I am wonder how does this happen? After all if you are faking something youd know it. You wouldn't be wondering if you are. And I know I'm not faking. So why does it sometimes feel as if I am?
All the time.
I suspect it's because we as humans try to see things from the perspective of other people.
We have no idea how accustomed they are to our behaviour, and we tend to assume the worst.
That way you're prepared to explain that it was real to anyone around you.

It could also be that you don't trust those around you as much (like among strangers) or that you care about their mindset (you think you might annoy them, etc.).
 

We Never Know

No Slack
Here's a question I have- anyone else ever wonder if they're faking something they know they arent? Sometimes I feel as if I am faking being autistic for attention. But then like I'll like start stimming like crazy outta excitement or have a meltdown cuz of sensory issues. I am wonder how does this happen? After all if you are faking something youd know it. You wouldn't be wondering if you are. And I know I'm not faking. So why does it sometimes feel as if I am?

I'm not saying this is you. I'm simply giving an example of something similar.

Munchausen's syndrome is a psychological disorder where someone pretends to be ill or deliberately produces symptoms of illness in themselves.

Their main intention is to assume the "sick role" so that people care for them and they are the centre of attention.

Overview - Munchausen's syndrome.
 

Twilight Hue

Twilight, not bright nor dark, good nor bad.
Here's a question I have- anyone else ever wonder if they're faking something they know they arent? Sometimes I feel as if I am faking being autistic for attention. But then like I'll like start stimming like crazy outta excitement or have a meltdown cuz of sensory issues. I am wonder how does this happen? After all if you are faking something youd know it. You wouldn't be wondering if you are. And I know I'm not faking. So why does it sometimes feel as if I am?
Sometimes I emulate people I admire. Dunno if that's the same thing though.

It's a reason why I find gaming so immersing, it let's you actually be something that you can't be in real life.

I don't think there's really anything wrong in faking as long as things are kept in perspective to prevent dangerous or precarious situations.
 

VoidCat

Pronouns: he/him/they/them
I'm not saying this is you. I'm simply giving an example of something similar.

Munchausen's syndrome is a psychological disorder where someone pretends to be ill or deliberately produces symptoms of illness in themselves.

Their main intention is to assume the "sick role" so that people care for them and they are the centre of attention.

Overview - Munchausen's syndrome.

Sometimes I emulate people I admire. Dunno if that's the same thing though.

It's a reason why I find gaming so immersing, it let's you actually be something that you can't be in real life.

I don't think there's really anything wrong in faking as long as things are kept in perspective to prevent dangerous or precarious situations.
I know I aint faking tho. Like I know I have autism. Not faking that...its just sometimes I feel as tho I am faking even tho I am not. For instance I thought earlier maybe I aint actually autistic? Then a few minutes later I had to cover my ears cuz it was too loud but no one else covered their ears...
 

PureX

Veteran Member
Here's a question I have- anyone else ever wonder if they're faking something they know they arent? Sometimes I feel as if I am faking being autistic for attention. But then like I'll like start stimming like crazy outta excitement or have a meltdown cuz of sensory issues. I am wonder how does this happen? After all if you are faking something youd know it. You wouldn't be wondering if you are. And I know I'm not faking. So why does it sometimes feel as if I am?
I think it happens because you are not your affliction. That's why the affliction feels like it's being "put on": i.e., coming from some external source.
 

VoidCat

Pronouns: he/him/they/them
I think it happens because you are not your affliction. That's why the affliction feels like it's being "put on": i.e., coming from some external source.
I fit the symptoms to a T. Every mental health professional I've seen since I was 7 agrees(I've seen a lot of them)-plus I've even read the DSM-5. I have autism. Present symptoms of it even if I am alone. Ive lived with this my whole life. I've read other people's experiences with this. Done a lifetimes worth of research. Someone who isn't autistic wouldn't present this way. I think what others say about imposter syndrome may be right. I was forced to act neurotypical most of my life through violence. It's possible this is the reason I feel this way cuz my aunt told me I was looking for attention my whole life due to this. Beat it into me in order to get the message across. It'll take time before I can act like autistic myself without masking and without feeling as tho I am faking when I know I am not. Masking- pretending to be neurotypical by hiding symptoms
 
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