Alternatives to Marriage?

[ZooGirl02]

Hey everyone. I do not believe that a couple should be required to get married in order to have sex or have children. I believe that if they want, they should be allowed to either simply live together or even live apart from each other. I view marriage as mostly a legal construct. Yes, I do believe that marriage is a sacrament and all but I do not believe it is a necessary one. What do you believe on this?

 

[Eliot Wild]

I tend to agree with you. It seems to me that above all else, marriage is an agreement between two people. It is that simple. The particular laws that cover the jurisdiction in which the couple reside may require certain conditions be met before the state recognizes their union as an actual legal marriage, but that only has as much impact on the couple as they allow it to have on them. Of course, they might not receive all the marital benefits that the state entitles, so that could impact them and their union, but only if they desire those benefits.

Not knowing what the Bible states about marriage and the requirements for it, I obviously can't say what constitutes a biblically sanctioned marriage. But I don't believe the Bible to be infallible, nor do I believe it is a record of God's actual laws, so personally, I couldn't care less what the Bible says about marriage.

I think if two people decide to pronounce oaths to one another, and if in doing so they agree between themselves that a marriage bond has been consummated, then as an outside observer, who am I to challenge them?

 

[idea]

Hey everyone. I do not believe that a couple should be required to get married in order to have sex or have children.

Adults can do what they want, but children do best when raised by their own biological parents. Our parents are part of who we are - our genes, our eye color, there is a lot in us that came from our parents. Knowing and understanding your parents, is part of how you come to know and understand yourself.

Do what you want - but when there is another person involved, a child... I mean you should not have a child for selfish reasons, you should put what is best for the child first. Children have a right to know both halves of themself...

 

[Tarheeler]

Hey everyone. I do not believe that a couple should be required to get married in order to have sex or have children. I believe that if they want, they should be allowed to either simply live together or even live apart from each other. I view marriage as mostly a legal construct. Yes, I do believe that marriage is a sacrament and all but I do not believe it is a necessary one. What do you believe on this?

I think that the legal part is nothing more that a civil union, regardless of who you are. The only purpose it serves is to provide a streamlined process for inheritance, domestic benefits and other legal issues, and tax breaks. It should be open to any consenting adult.

Marriage is a religious and/or personal ceremony, and completely up to the individual.

I don't think that either should ever be forced, and I think the the first should be done away with completely. The government shouldn't give "legal" couples any special allowances over the rest of the population.

 

[idea]

The government shouldn't give "legal" couples any special allowances over the rest of the population.

the future of the country depends upon it's children. I think parents who are raising children should be given special allowances as the future of the country is in their hands.

 

[Tarheeler]

the future of the country depends upon it's children. I think parents who are raising children should be given special allowances as the future of the country is in their hands.

You don't have to be married to have and raise children.

And I think that citizens of a nation should be treated equally by its government.

 

[idea]

You don't have to be married to have and raise children.

And I think that citizens of a nation should be treated equally by its government.

you don't have to be married, but children do better if you are... so if you want stable kids and a stable future, marriage should be encouraged.

I think ppl should be treated according to their works. ppl should get what they earn.

http://family.jrank.org/pages/1577/Single-Parent-Families-Effects-on-Children.html

In the United States, the effects of single-parent family life on children fall into two categories: (1) those attributed to the lower socioeconomic status of single parents and (2) the short-term consequences of divorce that moderate over time. Four factors are predictive of U.S. children's adjustment to the divorce of their parents: the passage of time, the quality of the children's relationship with their residential parent, the level of conflict between parents, and the economic standing of the children's residential family. In the first few years after a divorce, the children have higher rates of antisocial behavior, aggression, anxiety, and school problems than children in two parent families. However, some of these problems may be attributed to a decrease in available resources and adult super-vision; many of the negative effects disappear when there is adequate supervision, income, and continuity in social networks (McLanahan and Sandefur 1994).

In mother-only families, children tend to experience short-and long-term economic and psychological disadvantages; higher absentee rates at school, lower levels of education, and higher dropout rates (with boys more negatively affected than girls); and more delinquent activity, including alcohol and drug addiction. Adolescents, on the other hand, are more negatively affected by parental discord prior to divorce than by living in single-parent families and actually gain in responsibility as a result of altered family routines (Demo and Acock 1991). Children in single-mother homes are also more likely to experience health-related problems as a result of the decline in their living standard, including the lack of health insurance (Mauldin 1990). Later, as children from single-parent families become adults, they are more likely to marry early, have children early, and divorce. Girls are at greater risk of becoming single mothers as a result of nonmarital childbearing or divorce (McLanahan and Booth 1989). Although the research findings are mixed on long-term effects, the majority of children adjust and recover and do not experience severe problems over time (Coontz 1997).

A common explanation for the problems found among the children of single parents has been the absence of a male adult in the family (Gongla 1982). The relationship between children and non-custodial fathers can be difficult and strained. Fathers often become disinterested and detached from their children; in one study more than 60 percent of fathers either did not visit their children or had no contact with them for over a year. The loss of a father in the family can have implications beyond childhood (Wallerstein and Blakeslee 1989). However, the lack of a male presence may not be as critical as the lack of a male income to the family. The economic deprivation of single-parent family life, in combination with other sources of strain and stress, is a major source of the problems experienced by both parents and children.


Read more: Single-Parent Families - The Effects On Children - Family, Children, Single, Family, Divorce, Problems, Parent, Parents, and Effects http://family.jrank.org/pages/1577/Single-Parent-Families-Effects-on-Children.html#ixzz0vD0QzQL1
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[Tarheeler]

you don't have to be married, but children do better if you are... so if you want stable kids and a stable future, marriage should be encouraged.

I think ppl should be treated according to their works. ppl should get what they earn.

http://family.jrank.org/pages/1577/Single-Parent-Families-Effects-on-Children.html

Again, I don't think marriage is required for any of that.

But, seeing as this is in a DIR, I'll leave y'all to discuss it amongst yourselves.

 

[ZooGirl02]

Adults can do what they want, but children do best when raised by their own biological parents. Our parents are part of who we are - our genes, our eye color, there is a lot in us that came from our parents. Knowing and understanding your parents, is part of how you come to know and understand yourself.

Do what you want - but when there is another person involved, a child... I mean you should not have a child for selfish reasons, you should put what is best for the child first. Children have a right to know both halves of themself...

So do you think it is wrong then for a child to be raised by a gay couple since obviously one of the parents is not going to be biological and in some cases both parents might not be biological? And what do you think about children being raised by adoptive parents? Is there something wrong with that? Personally, I see nothing wrong with any of those choices.

 

[LuisDantas]

you don't have to be married, but children do better if you are... so if you want stable kids and a stable future, marriage should be encouraged.

I agree with the second part, but not with the premise. Do you think marriages are helpful to the children even when they don't work?