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Advice?

Philomath

Sadhaka
(Warning: This may be pretty long) So today I had an "intervention" with my parents. On my Facebook I had this image of Krishna and Radha as my background.

1rKbjXc.jpg


Somehow my parents found me on Facebook, most likely through one of my sisters because I don't have them as friends. But anyways they scrolled through the images I used as my Facebook header and they were all Hindu related images. I come from what many would consider a "fundamentalist" Christian background. My parents proceeded to degenerate Hinduism claiming it was "demonic", "satanic", "evil", "idol worship" and saying I was somehow being initiated into a cult. :confused:

I sat and listened laughing to myself throughout most of their tirade. They asked me why I had them as my header. I would have loved to say it's because I'm a Hindu but I can't tell them I've changed religions until I become financially independent of them. So instead I sat and pretended like I was still a Christian which really annoyed me.

My parents and the Christian sects they belong to actively believe in the Devil, evil spirits and etc. My mom began telling me stories of how back home(She's from Africa) how people had bought Indian statues and they had transformed into human beings during the night through witchcraft. :facepalm:

I couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculousness of this statement. They proceeded to warn me how these pictures could invoke "evil" powers which could harm me and my family. What killed me the most is when she pulled up a picture of Lord Shiva with multiple snakes wrapped around his neck and tried to correlate it into the Christian belief of snakes being evil. The rest of the conversation followed along those lines.

My relationship with my parents is already rocky but this made me realize that in my future I will basically have nothing to do with them. I respect their beliefs but they can't respect mine? So now I'm left with the question of what to do from here. I posted this is the Hinduism DIR and I'm posting it here now to see a different perspective. Any advice you can give me?
 

Thana

Lady
This is hard,
From my own personal experience with a variety of Christians, They can be stubborn and cruel, Especially the fire and brimstone ones.

Your parents should respect and love you, regardless of your beliefs.
Remind them that the devil cannot harm them, If they have Jesus in their life, And that they should love you, Just as Jesus teaches love.

Don't 'disown' them, Rather, Tell them the truth and let them know that they cannot change your mind or your heart, And that if they love you they will accept you for who you are and leave it alone.

When I've had conflicting views with my father (He's Jewish and I'm Christian) We argue, And when it gets to a point where it's too much (Or becomes upsetting/offensive), We just stop talking about it.
He knows where I stand and I know where he stands.
We just accept each other, And drop the conversation when necessary.

I hope everything works out for you,
And I hope your parents realize how important love is :)
 

Philomath

Sadhaka
This is hard,
From my own personal experience with a variety of Christians, They can be stubborn and cruel, Especially the fire and brimstone ones.]

These are the kind my parents are. They don't advocate it that loudly but they make sure it's known.

Your parents should respect and love you, regardless of your beliefs.
Remind them that the devil cannot harm them, If they have Jesus in their life, And that they should love you, Just as Jesus teaches love.

I'll try to remind them of this in the future.

Don't 'disown' them, Rather, Tell them the truth and let them know that they cannot change your mind or your heart, And that if they love you they will accept you for who you are and leave it alone.

When I've had conflicting views with my father (He's Jewish and I'm Christian) We argue, And when it gets to a point where it's too much (Or becomes upsetting/offensive), We just stop talking about it.
He knows where I stand and I know where he stands.
We just accept each other, And drop the conversation when necessary.

I'll have to hold up on doing that but I don't believe this will end well at all. I think the conflict is too large for it to be like your situation.

I hope everything works out for you,
And I hope your parents realize how important love is :)

Thanks :)
 

InChrist

Free4ever
Although it may be unpleasant when your parents respond as they did I think you should consider that if they didn't care about you then they would show no concern at all. But it seems obvious that they are concerned. You may not think there are demons or evil spirits, yet the biblical scriptures are adamant that there are and they do attack and possess human beings with the intent to destroy. Jesus was certainly aware of them as He cast them out.

My advice is to at least listen to and consider you parents concerns and ask God directly about the issue. Ultimately it is your choice and that includes any consequences.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Wanderer From Afar
Premium Member
I'm very sorry that you are experiencing this division with your family. I have a lot of problems with fundamentalist Protestants, myself. I had to deal with misunderstandings and bigotry when I converted to Catholicism and I still have to deal with anti-Catholic sentiment. If you were my family member, I'd accept your religious choice (I have a basic understanding of Hinduism so it's not that "strange" to me). You have to realize that their opinions are based on concern for you, but also ignorance about your religious path. Through knowing you, they may learn about actual Hinduism.

Personally, the only religions I have a real issue with and would fear for a loved one's soul over are destructive cults like Scientology or negative paths like Satanism (I have been involved with Satanism and know enough about it to say that; it was the negativity that drove me away from it). I hope that you are able to gain your independence from them ASAP.
 
I too am so sorry that you have to deal with this. These type of Christians are the minority but create a dis-proportionate amount of negativity for Christianity, especially in the States. :(

Don't your parents realize that no-one can be forced to a faith or religion. It is impossible. Paradoxical. If they try to force you, you could end up despising Christianity due to this experience.

I hope you find the strength and inspiration to take them on with this, as what they are doing is wrong on every level.

Perhaps you could say to them; "Mother, Father, I believe in one God, and I believe in your God; but the path that God has revealed to me, is the Eastern Path, and that is what I must follow as God has revealed it".

(These are not my hearfelt sentiments, I have to be honest, but I write them as something that may appeal to the sort of Christians that your parents appear to be).
 
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Saint Frankenstein

Wanderer From Afar
Premium Member
:D Thanks...I like your sig too.

Thank you, friend. :)

Just remember that God is with you, in you and in Him, you have your being (unless you are an atheist Hindu, then I don't know what to tell you, lol). Don't let what closed-minded people have to say about your personal religious choice get you down. It is only temporary. Flee to your Devas/Devis for guidance and strength.
 

Philomath

Sadhaka
Thank you, friend. :)

Just remember that God is with you, in you and in Him, you have your being (unless you are an atheist Hindu, then I don't know what to tell you, lol). Don't let what closed-minded people have to say about your personal religious choice get you down. It is only temporary. Flee to your Devas/Devis for guidance and strength.

Thank you, I'll try to take this advice to heart :)
 

Contemplative Cat

energy formation
I'm sorry man, stay strong and fight the good fight.
And babas leave attaxhment to their families behnd. Your avatar is always a Baba Sadhu, if your serious about it then start to day. Have a local Hindu temple adopt you and renounce the world.
Spend your time on sadhana and make everything else secondary.
Of course you don't have to its your trip.
 

Philomath

Sadhaka
I'm sorry man, stay strong and fight the good fight.
And babas leave attaxhment to their families behnd. Your avatar is always a Baba Sadhu, if your serious about it then start to day. Have a local Hindu temple adopt you and renounce the world.
Spend your time on sadhana and make everything else secondary.
Of course you don't have to its your trip.

I'll try to :)

I have great admiration for Sadhu's and hopefully in the future maybe I can be one. I have renunciation plans in the future but not right now.
 

Karl R

Active Member
I respect their beliefs but they can't respect mine?
You can respect others, but you can't make them to respect you. You can learn and expand your knowledge, but you can't make others abandon their ignorance and learn.

You will feel a lot less frustration once you accept the limitations of your situation. Accept what is, then work from there.

Any advice you can give me?
Learn as much as you can about the bible and christianity. Read the same translation of the bible that your parents do. I can guarantee that some of their beliefs will contradict what is actually written in the bible. When that happens, you can turn to the bible as a higher authority that they will respect and listen to.

You don't have to agree with a bible passage in order to use it to support your own point, but you do need to know it.

As a side benefit, if your parents see you studying the bible and becoming extremely knowledgeable about what it says, they are likely to assume that you're a devout christian. It generally won't occur to them that a non-christian would spend that much time and effort learning about christianity. (Look at how little time and effort they've spent trying to learn about other religions.)

I'm a Hindu but I can't tell them I've changed religions until I become financially independent of them.
Become financially independent as soon as possible.

I'm going to assume that you're still in high school (or younger). Get a job and save all the money that you earn. Most teenagers lack the discipline to do this, but you have a strong motivation to do so.

Money buys freedom.

As you save up money, you develop the ability to support yourself without your parents' money. At first it may only be for a few days. As you save more money, it will be enough to support you for a few weeks. Then a few months.

If the worst happens, and your parents kick you out because you don't follow their beliefs, you will be able to support yourself for days/weeks/months while you look for other solutions to your situation.

In addition, study hard and get good grades. The better you do in school, the more likely it is that you can get a free ride to college. My sister decided that she wanted to be free from my parents as soon as possible, so she attended a school that offered her a scholarship for tuition, room and board. At age 19 she cut ties with them, because she no longer needed anything from them.

There is a cost to that decision. She had to choose one of the few colleges which would offer her a free ride, instead of one of the more prestigious schools that had accepted her. If you can't get a free ride, you may end up having to support yourself at a young age, which can seriously interfere with pursuing a college degree.

All of these solutions require a lot of effort on your part, probably without seeing any immediate benefit.

But you can stay motivated if you focus on your goal of freedom from your parents. All the money you save (or scholarships that you earn) will buy you that freedom.

Somehow my parents found me on Facebook,
Unplug.

My family can't find me on Facebook, because I don't have a Facebook page. I don't have a blog. I don't have a twitter account. I don't have a MySpace page.

My decision to unplug sometimes keeps me out of the loop, but I have more privacy than nearly anyone I know.

What killed me the most is when she pulled up a picture of Lord Shiva with multiple snakes wrapped around his neck and tried to correlate it into the Christian belief of snakes being evil.
You are not responsible for their decision to remain ignorant about other religions. That's their choice, and you cannot make their choices for them.

You can only accept their choice and move on with your own life.
 

CMike

Well-Known Member
That is a tough one.

You are free to believe what you want (well you should be, as long as it doesn't harm anyone).

If you are at their mercy, I suggest don't argue. Just let them say whatever, shut up, and do what you think is right...quietly.
 

Badran

Veteran Member
Premium Member
***Mod post***

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