Should you support your child's decision to choose another faith or doctrine?

When a child is 12 years old, they are responsible for themselves according to many beliefs.

Should you support you child's decision to choose a different belief?

A baptist couples daughter decision to become pagan
A gay couples son deciding to become a baptist minister
A catholic couples child deciding to be jewish
A jewish couples child deciding to be muslim
A pagan couples child deciding to be pentecostal

You get my point.

What say you?

Certainly, unless they decide to join a cult or somesuch that's dangerous to themselves and others. Otherwise it's their own spirituality.

Absolutely. Besides, if you try to force them to follow your beliefs, you'll only succeed in driving a wedge between yourself and your child.

Yes, that's the reason why I'm looking into U/U churches at the moment, so she could decide on her own, cause after all, I don't even ascribe to one specific doctrine.

You should fully support them.

My parents supported me, and I will do that with my children.

Yes if you truly love your children you should support them...Let me take this a step farther if your child wants to convert to another religion because of peer pressure then you might need to have a talk with them.

In most instances I would support them. However, there are certain beliefs I am completely intolerant of, and I would definetly discourage them in those cases. I'm not saying I'm right to do that, I'm just being honest.

Yes. Though sometimes the child may believe in something that the parent's beliefs are strictly against. Like a christian couple's child becoming atheist. Accepting can be very difficult for some, the parents and the child.

Suppose the kid gets into some crazy cult.

Absolutely, yes.



My parents support me, and I am on a completely different path than they. I would be rather remiss if I didn't offer the same to my kids.



It's kind of been that way on my side of the family from generation to generation. There are so many converts from Catholic to Lutheran to Methodist to Native American to Pagan to one now considering Hinduism.............and wittle ol' me as a Buddhist. We've been sort of trained to be accepting of other beliefs as a family unit.



Peace,
Mystic

Reverend Rick said:

When a child is 12 years old, they are responsible for themselves according to many beliefs.

Should you support you child's decision to choose a different belief?

A baptist couples daughter decision to become pagan
A gay couples son deciding to become a baptist minister
A catholic couples child deciding to be jewish
A jewish couples child deciding to be muslim
A pagan couples child deciding to be pentecostal

You get my point.

What say you?

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Personally, I think twelve is a bit young. My children were baptized LDS at the age of eight, which is our custom and doctrine. Had either of them said that they didn't want to be baptized, I would not have forced them. My son was actually a little bit hesitant to be baptized, and when I asked him why, he said (as if he were a little bit ashamed to admit it), "I'm just not all that sure that I believe that story about Jonah." It cracked me up, but at the same time, it pleased me to no end to know that I was raising a child who could think for himself. By the time he was sixteen, he no longer wanted to attend church. I didn't press the issue and he eventually stopped attending altogether. I'm not happy about that, but it's his choice. He is now engaged to a Catholic girl who is doing her best to convince him to convert to Catholicism. He has basically told her, "No, I can't do that; I don't believe in it." If he did believe in it and wanted to convert, I'd be disappointed, but I'd also admire the fact that he did so for the right reasons and did not compromise his own integrity in the process. I don't think he would have had the maturity or knowledge to make that decision at the age of twelve, though.

Greetings!

>Should you support your child's decision to choose another faith or doctrine?

Not only most assuredly, but DEFINITELY!!!!!

And this exactly what the Baha'i Faith--for one--commands each and every person to do: Pray, search, read, and investigatate each path. Then decide where the truth lies, and follow that!

Please note that this holds for our own chlidren, too! We have the obligation to teach them about the goodness and validity of all the great religions, and at age 15, each of them has the right to decide what to follow: the Baha'i Faith, something else, or nothing whatever! And parents have NO right to interfere with this decision!

Works for us!

Recommended.

Bruce

Reverend Rick said:

When a child is 12 years old, they are responsible for themselves according to many beliefs.

Should you support you child's decision to choose a different belief?

A baptist couples daughter decision to become pagan
A gay couples son deciding to become a baptist minister
A catholic couples child deciding to be jewish
A jewish couples child deciding to be muslim
A pagan couples child deciding to be pentecostal

You get my point.

What say you?

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I would absolutely support my child's decision to choose their own religious or spiritual path, even at the age of twelve, however, I believe that so long as my child's living under my roof, especially if he or she is under eighteen, I have a responsibility to let my feelings be known if I think something isn't right.

Reverend Rick said:

When a child is 12 years old, they are responsible for themselves according to many beliefs.

Should you support you child's decision to choose a different belief?

A baptist couples daughter decision to become pagan
A gay couples son deciding to become a baptist minister
A catholic couples child deciding to be jewish
A jewish couples child deciding to be muslim
A pagan couples child deciding to be pentecostal

You get my point.

What say you?

Click to expand...

Yup, even in the case of the gay couple's son. What they're really affirming is the child's intellectual independence and self-esteem, which eventually leads to better moral character. Even if the child actually did become a Baptist minister, he could not truly have a hatred toward gays as long as he had the unconditional love of his parents. There are plenty of Baptist ministers, in fact, who take a humanitarian and forgiving approach to this subject. There are even some churches who would break ties with other congregations in defense of the gays and lesbians among their number, as evidenced by a few churches in North Carolina who did exactly that just this year. Though this may seem to be an unlikely stance for me to take, I am very convinced of the importance of showing praise for a child's ambitions.

Katzpur said:

Personally, I think twelve is a bit young.

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I was baptized at age 12. Looking back now I don't think I knew enough about anything to make that decision. My thoughts and beliefs at 12 are almost completely different from what they are now.

For the people at large who choose a religious path that is exclusive in propostion, meaning it is seen as the "one true path" or "only path" I think socialization and structuring of a coehsive family unit is one of the larger motivators and as such I am skeptical that if the reality of your child wanting to practice a different faith were to come to life that you wouldn't push with resistance.

If you were a practicing pagan and you told me your kid wanted to do something else and you were cool with it I would likely buy that idea much more than if you were say a Jew, christian or muslim and said the same thing. The reason being that by your alliangence to your faith they have chosen something that is not "the one true path" and that one of the stronger selling points of those faiths is the proposition of familty unity by proposition of uniform spirtuality.

I'll tell you when it gets to that.
There are some ideologies I would not support, and be up front in telling my sons and daughters about it. Why would I support something I thought would bring harm to them?

Victor said:

I'll tell you when it gets to that.
There are some ideologies I would not support, and be up front in telling my sons and daughters about it. Why would I support something I thought would bring harm to them?

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I'll advise you in advance, then, that the last thing you want to do is tell the kid he's doing something wrong. When they're flexing their mental muscles like that, they seem to know instinctively that it's good for them, and they're just going to take exception over being held back. You're more likely to redirect their interest by challenging their sense of empathy, another thing that they understand to be a higher part of their development and which is related to their intellectual pursuits. In short, emotional blackmail works better than brute force. I don't agree with it, but it at least wouldn't make for a broken family. I have a friend up in MI who says that his father still manages to drag him off to church on occassion, in spite of his less than kind assessment of their beliefs, just by saying "it just makes me happier to have you with us." What a lot of parents don't understand is that, when you jostle a kid the wrong way when he's in the midst of flexing his mental muscles, he just throws down his hat puts up his dukes. Being defiant then becomes a method of expressing self-value.

Real Sorceror said:

In most instances I would support them. However, there are certain beliefs I am completely intolerant of, and I would definetly discourage them in those cases. I'm not saying I'm right to do that, I'm just being honest.

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Exactly what beliefs are you intolerant of? Are they harmful to society, or himself? If not, then it's just a matter of opinion

I would let my children believe in whatever they want. Let them choose what they feel is right. But I would still encourage them to keep their mind open to all other beliefs

`PaWz said:

I would let my children believe in whatever they want. Let them choose what they feel is right. But I would still encourage them to keep their mind open to all other beliefs

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Yup. Obama's mom actually insisted that he learn something of all faiths and cultures, according to him. She was an anthropologist and a secular humanist, herself. In case it's escaped anyone's attention, I'm a fanboy .