Since this post is almost entirely about a personal experience, I figured Journals fit it best.
A few months ago, I decided to have a look at some ex-Muslim forums to see if our shared religious background and deconversion could lead to friendship and positive discussions.
And boy was I wrong. While a few people here and there on such forums did seem pretty reasonable and friendly, the overall atmosphere I encountered was ironically similar to that of a fundamentalist, fanatic religious circle: overgeneralizations, simplistic thinking of religion as a monolithic entity, flat-out hate speech targeting religious people, misunderstanding of religious texts (sometimes willful) to paint religion as the ultimate evil in the world, and bitterness that clearly shapes many of the comments within those venues.
Now, far be it from me to say that I don't understand why someone who has experienced bigotry and abuse due to religious fundamentalism would be upset at a specific religion or religions. In fact, I also understand why a religious person in, say, China or North Korea could be similarly upset at atheism. But to have so little self-awareness that one lets this lead them to bigotry and hatred of their own is inconsistent and ironic at best.
Furthermore, I have found after years of harboring anti-religious sentiments that the kinds of bitterness, resentment, and generalization required to sustain such an outlook are not just toxic to moderate and compassionate religious people but also to the people harboring them. Bitterness creates baggage that only the person harboring it has to live with. It also doesn't seem reasonable to cling to after meeting more open-minded and friendly religious people that differ from the majority of those from one's background or culture of origin.
One of my biggest thought-provoking moments was when I met an LGBT woman I had befriended online and then later found out she was a Muslim. Unlike most Muslims where I'm from, she's pro-LGBT, feminist, and supportive of religious tolerance even for groups like atheists and anti-theists. It got me thinking that for any reasonable secularist or atheist, supporting people like her and helping them promote their peaceful interpretations of religion is far more productive and rational than simply saying that they're only the way they are because of not being "religious enough" or being "ignorant of their religion."
I believe an anti-religious or anti-theistic phase may be an important part of personal growth for some people, just as an anti-atheist phase could be. The keyword here is "phase," however--anytime such a bitter, resentful outlook extends beyond being temporary, it leads to more hatred, misunderstanding, and overgeneralization... and I don't think the world needs any more of these things.
And that's why I no longer identify as anti-religious, why I'm not on any ex-Muslim forums, and also why I don't feel much sense of fellowship when I look at specific online circles and see problematic sentiments like the ones I mentioned above. Nowadays I consider myself against harmful teachings and beliefs, which I view as only a subset of specific religious interpretations (and a subset of many secular ideologies too) rather than the whole of religion.
A few months ago, I decided to have a look at some ex-Muslim forums to see if our shared religious background and deconversion could lead to friendship and positive discussions.
And boy was I wrong. While a few people here and there on such forums did seem pretty reasonable and friendly, the overall atmosphere I encountered was ironically similar to that of a fundamentalist, fanatic religious circle: overgeneralizations, simplistic thinking of religion as a monolithic entity, flat-out hate speech targeting religious people, misunderstanding of religious texts (sometimes willful) to paint religion as the ultimate evil in the world, and bitterness that clearly shapes many of the comments within those venues.
Now, far be it from me to say that I don't understand why someone who has experienced bigotry and abuse due to religious fundamentalism would be upset at a specific religion or religions. In fact, I also understand why a religious person in, say, China or North Korea could be similarly upset at atheism. But to have so little self-awareness that one lets this lead them to bigotry and hatred of their own is inconsistent and ironic at best.
Furthermore, I have found after years of harboring anti-religious sentiments that the kinds of bitterness, resentment, and generalization required to sustain such an outlook are not just toxic to moderate and compassionate religious people but also to the people harboring them. Bitterness creates baggage that only the person harboring it has to live with. It also doesn't seem reasonable to cling to after meeting more open-minded and friendly religious people that differ from the majority of those from one's background or culture of origin.
One of my biggest thought-provoking moments was when I met an LGBT woman I had befriended online and then later found out she was a Muslim. Unlike most Muslims where I'm from, she's pro-LGBT, feminist, and supportive of religious tolerance even for groups like atheists and anti-theists. It got me thinking that for any reasonable secularist or atheist, supporting people like her and helping them promote their peaceful interpretations of religion is far more productive and rational than simply saying that they're only the way they are because of not being "religious enough" or being "ignorant of their religion."
I believe an anti-religious or anti-theistic phase may be an important part of personal growth for some people, just as an anti-atheist phase could be. The keyword here is "phase," however--anytime such a bitter, resentful outlook extends beyond being temporary, it leads to more hatred, misunderstanding, and overgeneralization... and I don't think the world needs any more of these things.
And that's why I no longer identify as anti-religious, why I'm not on any ex-Muslim forums, and also why I don't feel much sense of fellowship when I look at specific online circles and see problematic sentiments like the ones I mentioned above. Nowadays I consider myself against harmful teachings and beliefs, which I view as only a subset of specific religious interpretations (and a subset of many secular ideologies too) rather than the whole of religion.
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