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What do your cultures beliefs say or what does your religion say about accepting help?

Deeje

Avid Bible Student
Premium Member
That was the karate punch of info! Thank you thank you! This is just what I started this thread to learn about.
I know I maybe could have shared more in the beginning to help move this along but this is the nature of a discussion. Back and forth.

Hey Nathan, happy to oblige. ;) The good thing about a discussion on a public forum, is that its not only the participants who can share the conversation. Many who never post, just read. If they learn something from the exchange, that's wonderful!

Everyone has to make up their own mind about these things. But informed choice is most beneficial.

I was really starting to doubt this was the place for me. As you have probably read I have been subtly accused of a lot here before the conversation even began. It was also suggested in private conversation here that I am a drug addict.

To be honest, most people are drug addicts...its just that the drugs they choose are legal. Drugs are usually sought to make pain manageable....who is not in pain...emotionally....physically....mentally, these days?

Someone in chronic pain, if they are subject to the orthodox medical system, are more than likely opioid dependent. That is hardly their fault. They are not given a lot of choice. :(
Many others seek relief in a bottle of something else, or in some other "medicine" that helps them deal with life. Its too easy to point fingers and lack understanding...something God does not do.
Whilst he expects us to obey the law, he fully understands the reasons for the devastating rate of addiction in the world today....and offers hope and a better way to deal with the pain. Never forced but always encouraged. Once you know God, you will feel his hand on your shoulder.....

Isaiah 30:21...
"Your own ears will hear a word behind you saying: ‘This is the way. Walk in it, you people,’ in case you people should go to the right or in case you should go to the left.”
There is one road to life and God will help us find it and stay on it. (Matthew 7:13-14)

"So, never be anxious about the next day, for the next day will have its own anxieties. Sufficient for each day is its own badness." (Matthew 6:34)
I love that. It is philosophical and logical. I have copied and pasted your entire message for later contemplation.
Also thank you for reassuring in some way that my relationship with God is acceptable. It's funny almost every time I pray I yawn over and over and cannot get my words through. I have always laughed and said, "I get it. You already know." lol

He knows what we need, but also whether we are depending on him, or trying to do it all in our own strength.
He reads hearts, not just minds.

Also I never understood why people say, "amen" like it means I'm done or the end. From the way I understand it means in truth or said in honesty. God knows hahah. I never said Amen because no one could explain it. So for a long time I just finish my prayers by saying, "I love you God".

"Amen" means "so be it,” or “surely.” The word comes from the Hebrew root word ʼa·manʹ, which means “to be faithful, trustworthy.” “Amen” was said in agreement to an oath, a prayer, or a statement. In Revelation, it is even used as a title for Jesus. (Revelation 3:14)

I often imagine God being emotional like the old testament speaks of. If God has emotion then what other emotions does God experience? So I sometimes pray saying I hope your handleing us OK and we are not upsetting you too much and talk about some of the nonsense on earth. Supprisingly those are the prayers where I am not yawning over and over and over.
Not sure what if anything that means but I love God and when I used to say it it felt good.

Since we are "made in God's image and likeness" we reflect his emotions as well....love, regret, anger, compassion, pity, long-suffering...all of these are based on LOVE. In Greek, this love is "agape" which is not a love based on transient emotion, but on principal. We can love even an enemy with this kind of love.....if someone mistreats us or persecutes us unfairly, we can employ this love by not allowing the negative emotion that this generates to overtake us, but to still treat that person with agape.....a love that stifles hatred.

Lately I have had soo much doubt put in me about loving God properly or addressing him in a specific way.
This makes me feel better about how I felt in me heart about our relationship.

God leads us to his truth if we are genuine. No one can become a disciple of Jesus unless they get the OK from his Father first.....imagine! getting an invitation from the Creator himself! (John 6:65) We will understand nothing if that does not happen. That doesn't stop people from putting their own spin on the Bible's message however, which I see in very clear and simple terms. Not something you need a degree in theology to understand. In fact a degree in theology might just point you in the opposite direction. o_O

Perfect just was I was looking for!

Thank you for the time you spent gathering and typing that body of knowledge.

Nathan :)

My pleasure.....ask whatever questions you like. :)
 

NAY

Member
Hey Nathan, happy to oblige. ;) The good thing about a discussion on a public forum, is that its not only the participants who can share the conversation. Many who never post, just read. If they learn something from the exchange, that's wonderful!

Everyone has to make up their own mind about these things. But informed choice is most beneficial.



To be honest, most people are drug addicts...its just that the drugs they choose are legal. Drugs are usually sought to make pain manageable....who is not in pain...emotionally....physically....mentally, these days?

Someone in chronic pain, if they are subject to the orthodox medical system, are more than likely opioid dependent. That is hardly their fault. They are not given a lot of choice. :(
Many others seek relief in a bottle of something else, or in some other "medicine" that helps them deal with life. Its too easy to point fingers and lack understanding...something God does not do.
Whilst he expects us to obey the law, he fully understands the reasons for the devastating rate of addiction in the world today....and offers hope and a better way to deal with the pain. Never forced but always encouraged. Once you know God, you will feel his hand on your shoulder.....

Isaiah 30:21...
"Your own ears will hear a word behind you saying: ‘This is the way. Walk in it, you people,’ in case you people should go to the right or in case you should go to the left.”
There is one road to life and God will help us find it and stay on it. (Matthew 7:13-14)



He knows what we need, but also whether we are depending on him, or trying to do it all in our own strength.
He reads hearts, not just minds.



"Amen" means "so be it,” or “surely.” The word comes from the Hebrew root word ʼa·manʹ, which means “to be faithful, trustworthy.” “Amen” was said in agreement to an oath, a prayer, or a statement. In Revelation, it is even used as a title for Jesus. (Revelation 3:14)



Since we are "made in God's image and likeness" we reflect his emotions as well....love, regret, anger, compassion, pity, long-suffering...all of these are based on LOVE. In Greek, this love is "agape" which is not a love based on transient emotion, but on principal. We can love even an enemy with this kind of love.....if someone mistreats us or persecutes us unfairly, we can employ this love by not allowing the negative emotion that this generates to overtake us, but to still treat that person with agape.....a love that stifles hatred.



God leads us to his truth if we are genuine. No one can become a disciple of Jesus unless they get the OK from his Father first.....imagine! getting an invitation from the Creator himself! (John 6:65) We will understand nothing if that does not happen. That doesn't stop people from putting their own spin on the Bible's message however, which I see in very clear and simple terms. Not something you need a degree in theology to understand. In fact a degree in theology might just point you in the opposite direction. o_O



My pleasure.....ask whatever questions you like. :)
Hello Deeje,

I do not mean to sound like I'm better than an addict. Adiction is an easy problem to have when life gets tough. I tell my friends every day, " I don't know how I am not an alcoholic or abusing my medication." I feel extremely fortunate that I do not have this problem. Or eating for pleasure. In the USA that is a huge problem too. Eating to feel good. I am living the perfect recipe for addiction and substance abuse. I also work very hard at keeping my feelings of giving up and drinking alcohol with my medications at bay. I fight that urge every day and I'm not an addict (meaning I'm fighting the urge but I don't have a problem with adiction, or luckily I have never had an addictive personality. That would make it sooo much harder).
You have treated me with kindness and respect and I appreciate that. I hope i have shown you the same.

I look forward to using another forum here to learn about Jesus. The new testament and Jesus is one of the most confusing parts of Christianity for me.

I appreciate your ability to break apart my comments and speak the them. That is a talent and you have a knack for it!

Thanks again,
Nathan
 

NAY

Member
Accepting help is no problem, and may even be compulsive if one would otherwise hurt oneself or others, whether directly or indirectly. By not accepting help, not only do you deprive yourself but others of being able to carry out charitable acts. Accepting help is exactly what it sounds like you need to do right now, as well as having serious talks with the people who want to help you but won't step up.
Hello Rival,

It took me a few times to understand your message. Thank you for the encouragement to ask for help, and approach the people who are not following through on their promises.
I have not thought about that part of my problem. If I don't confront these issues with them it will surely dissolve our relationship (at least the people close to me friends and family). Doctors, lawyers, insurance companies, well they are a little harder to ask those questions to haha. But your advice is probably just as good with those types of people as well. I am just not sure how to ask without insulting them for not providing adequate timely care.
This I believe will be an important process in my ability to grow spiritually.

Thanks again,
Nathan
 

NAY

Member
If a person legitimately needs help, they should enthusiastically accept it.
Hello Vinayaka,

Thank you for your encouragement to accept help enthusiastically.
One of my problems is that although I need help I do not want to burden anyone.
I am only speaking about friends, family, or the community. I do not feel this way about paid professionals who should have pride and integrity to provide a good service. Although I express my heartfelt thanks to all professionals that afford their time to me.

Thank you for your message.
Nathan
 

Deeje

Avid Bible Student
Premium Member
I do not mean to sound like I'm better than an addict.
I didn't mean to imply that you did. :oops:

Adiction is an easy problem to have when life gets tough. I tell my friends every day, " I don't know how I am not an alcoholic or abusing my medication." I feel extremely fortunate that I do not have this problem. Or eating for pleasure. In the USA that is a huge problem too. Eating to feel good. I am living the perfect recipe for addiction and substance abuse. I also work very hard at keeping my feelings of giving up and drinking alcohol with my medications at bay. I fight that urge every day and I'm not an addict (meaning I'm fighting the urge but I don't have a problem with adiction, or luckily I have never had an addictive personality. That would make it sooo much harder).

Those with no hope often have nowhere else to turn. It's nice to be able to give people a spiritual anchor....something solid to hang onto....a way out of despair about the future. Meds help the body but the Bible feeds the soul.
You mentioned a plane crash...?

You have treated me with kindness and respect and I appreciate that. I hope i have shown you the same.
You have. :)

I look forward to using another forum here to learn about Jesus. The new testament and Jesus is one of the most confusing parts of Christianity for me.

I welcome any questions you have and will endeavor to answer from the Bible, because anything else is just opinion....there are lots of them here. Food for thought. You will judge for yourself.

I appreciate your ability to break apart my comments and speak the them. That is a talent and you have a knack for it!

I have been doing this a long time. 10 years on this site, and others before that. I'm a housebound carer so the computer is my widow on the world. I come and go all day sometimes, between duties. Its been a real education for me.

Bed time here in OZ....so will talk some more tomorrow...I look forward to your new thread. Christianity was never confusing to begin with......but people who wanted to put their own spin on things ended up making it very hard to understand. I hope I can simplify it for you. ;)

Later.....
 
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Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
Hello Vinayaka,

Thank you for your encouragement to accept help enthusiastically.
One of my problems is that although I need help I do not want to burden anyone.
I am only speaking about friends, family, or the community. I do not feel this way about paid professionals who should have pride and integrity to provide a good service. Although I express my heartfelt thanks to all professionals that afford their time to me.

Thank you for your message.
Nathan


Nobody wants to be a burden. Yet it is the cycle of life. As we age, we do need help. In some old societies, elderly people took a long walk. But these days society as a whole has a built in system. In Hinduism it's easier to understand as we helped our parents, paid our taxes, raised our kids, and more. So now we can accept the gift of help feeling assured that it will all balance out.
 

Ponder This

Well-Known Member
I am in a place where I need help. I have been independent my entire life until recently.
I find it hard to accept help, and when I do open up to accept it most people do not follow through.
I am curious what the world's belief systems / religions have to say about this.
I can only find information about giving and helping others, but nothing about being handicapped and receiving help.
Also how to cope with the endless ammounts of people who say a lot but do little (resulting in missed opportunities or more suffering).
I know a little about kharma and I understand I could be paying for my sins, so to speak, but I still need guidance while I am in this body on this earth.
Thank you for your time and consideration.

We have to learn to accept help, which is not the expectation of assistance, but the humility of the realization of our own lack of self-sufficiency.
Sometimes it is harder to accept help when you feel self-sufficient or when you know the best way for something to be done. So there is a resentment in the way the help others provide you does not measure up.
To dig a bit deeper you have to learn to distinguish the 'help' others provide. Sometimes 'help' is not actually helpful, if the person helping has a kind heart, you can set things right through kindness.
Another example, when it's not a birthday present you would want, you accept the gift with gratitude and grace because you appreciate the person giving the gift and the time and energy spent thinking about what was best for you even though the result was not what you most desired.

There is also the embarrassment of needing help, which may be the feeling of being a burden to others or, on the other hand, it may be the feeling of inadequacy - disappointment in the lack of self-sufficiency of oneself. It's not what you expected of yourself or it is not what you think others should expect of you and it is deeply embarrassing no matter how small or great the assistance is that you require. It may be that a person feels like a burden or feels defective in some way because he cannot do something himself that he believes or expects that he should be able to do. But eventually, in all such cases, these feelings must be surrendered and all the various forms of denial, anger, and depression associated with them. In the end we choose either to become resentful or grateful. The oyster turns the irritating bit of sand into a pearl. The inner transformation of our internal psyche eventually leads to beauty and value although we do not necessarily or immediately see it ourselves.
 

BilliardsBall

Veteran Member
I am in a place where I need help. I have been independent my entire life until recently.
I find it hard to accept help, and when I do open up to accept it most people do not follow through.
I am curious what the world's belief systems / religions have to say about this.
I can only find information about giving and helping others, but nothing about being handicapped and receiving help.
Also how to cope with the endless ammounts of people who say a lot but do little (resulting in missed opportunities or more suffering).
I know a little about kharma and I understand I could be paying for my sins, so to speak, but I still need guidance while I am in this body on this earth.
Thank you for your time and consideration.

Good news, IMHO:

1) karma is nonsense, Jesus uplifts
2) find a church that is Bible-based, they will shower help, love and acceptance upon you
3) don't rely on any atheists at RF or anywhere else, none of them on RF will give you a thin dime
 

sealchan

Well-Known Member
I am in a place where I need help. I have been independent my entire life until recently.
I find it hard to accept help, and when I do open up to accept it most people do not follow through.
I am curious what the world's belief systems / religions have to say about this.
I can only find information about giving and helping others, but nothing about being handicapped and receiving help.
Also how to cope with the endless ammounts of people who say a lot but do little (resulting in missed opportunities or more suffering).
I know a little about kharma and I understand I could be paying for my sins, so to speak, but I still need guidance while I am in this body on this earth.
Thank you for your time and consideration.

As a Christian there is a saying that is trite but useful, "let go and let God". If you have sincerely done everything you can to address some issue and nothing seems to work then set your efforts aside for awhile and wait for God (or, alternately, the Universe) to present you an opportunity or two. Then, when you return to the problem you will find that it may already be solved.
 

Neutral Name

Active Member
I am in a place where I need help. I have been independent my entire life until recently.
I find it hard to accept help, and when I do open up to accept it most people do not follow through.
I am curious what the world's belief systems / religions have to say about this.
I can only find information about giving and helping others, but nothing about being handicapped and receiving help.
Also how to cope with the endless ammounts of people who say a lot but do little (resulting in missed opportunities or more suffering).
I know a little about kharma and I understand I could be paying for my sins, so to speak, but I still need guidance while I am in this body on this earth.
Thank you for your time and consideration.

I am in the same situation. God wants you to learn to accept help, then it will be provided. Your lack of faith is the problem. I have had a hard time because I am very independent but I have had to rely on help and accept that I need help. Then I have received it.
 
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