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YliaChan

Member
Okay. I was worried it meant you had sex with a married man, which would have brought up the issue of assault.

While sex at 14 is early enough that I find it concerning, what bothers me more is the idea that sex should be a point of shame. The fact that you had sex does absolutely nothing to diminish your value as a person. Decent guys will know this.

Consider the possibility that if he thinks that you're "something to be ashamed of," then he's not worth your time... regardless of how it feels at the time.

And if this all happened today, try sleeping on it and see how you feel tomorrow once you've had the chance to digest it.
Perhaps you're right. But he does not point me out as something to be ashamed of, he was speaking of the actions we've done together. He's also under the influence of one of his parents.
 

Fool

ALL in all
Premium Member
Thank you for responding. Does that mean that God thinks I'm the problem? If love resolves everything and is a respector of none then is there a chance that perhaps God can bring that love back into my life?
god is love and love is god.

you didn't create a problem. you entered into a relationship with a person who had a problem with love, a problem with god.

do you really want someone who has a problem with being loved?

belief is a very, very powerful and hard thing to change.

you can prove and prove but that doesn't mean the believer will necessarily change their mind.

i think you've already given proof. unfortunately he believes God and Love are diametrically opposed.
 

Kenny

Face to face with my Father
Premium Member
You're right about that. Yet is it to late to convert to it? Will God still accept me?
Exactly! God will accept ANYONE who comes to Him. It will be just as if you just got born with no sin and He will never leave you even when you do.
 

Kenny

Face to face with my Father
Premium Member
But giving your life mean what Jesus did... "Not my will but yours be done". In other words, you will learn how to do things His way since when we do it His way, we don't have the problems like the one you have today.
 

Kenny

Face to face with my Father
Premium Member
Thank you for responding. Does that mean that God thinks I'm the problem? If love resolves everything and is a respector of none then is there a chance that perhaps God can bring that love back into my life?
As far as specifically bringing the young man back has many human-will factors since God doesn't force anyone to love. But accepting Jesus should be because you want Jesus, forgiveness and life--not so that you specifically will get back with the young man.
 

YliaChan

Member
you didn't create a problem. you entered into a relationship with a person who had a problem with love.

do you really want someone who has a problem with being loved?
Well I believe everyone has a right to be loved so yes even if he has a problem with being loved I would like to be that person that helps him resolve such a problem and show him the love he made me feel. I'm just not sure if he will rethink the message he received and see things a different way, which might perhaps change his mind about things?
 

Phantasman

Well-Known Member
Hey, I know this is a bit selfish to talk about but please hear me out. My boyfriend borke up with me today and when I asked him why he told me this story. He said this: "Your not gonna believe all this, But I went to church yesterday, I went up to the pastor and he prayed, I fell on my knees balling my eyes out, He told me, Dont do anything your ashamed of, I felt like I really heard something from God, It'ls like he's telling me your not right for me, And I'm Christian so whatever I hear from god, I obey it, And if I'm told your not right for me, Then your not right, I'm sorry" From my point of view it seems that God doesn't approve of me, and maybe he's right as I have comitted adultery twice at my age. Is there anything I can do for Him to approve of me and to bring my love back into my life? Is there a chance for me to sit down and pray to Him and maybe a chance that he will hear my prayers and send himinto my life again? Please help, preferably any Christian pastors with any serious advice. I am willing to sit down and start to worship God if He can bring me a miracle.
Wanting to "believe" or follow God for the sake of getting a boyfriend, sounds like what you want rather than what God may have planned for you. When God gives, it is greater than what we ourselves see as great.

Your boyfriend may see this and you don't. Atheists believe in the moment, from my understanding. The future path you carve out is either blazed by your own desires, or trusting in something that can reveal rewards and pitfalls due to knowing your future and what's best for you at the time.

Even if you told him you now follow God, chances are the relationship is still doomed. You may find God has someone even better than him, for YOU.

This is what faith (in God) is based on. Trusting that what he gives us is better than anything we get going it alone.

Just my thoughts.
 

Fool

ALL in all
Premium Member
Well I believe everyone has a right to be loved so yes even if he has a problem with being loved I would like to be that person that helps him resolve such a problem and show him the love he made me feel.
even if that necessarily isn't with you? we must always love and accept ourselves. we only get to keep the things we give away freely. love is being happy for someone as they are; if not harming any other directly. not how we think they should become, unless harming, oppressing, disenfranchising, marginalizing another directly.


I'm just not sure if he will rethink the message he received and see things a different way, which might perhaps change his mind about things?
so long as he accepts the influence of others, that isn't going to happen. he has to find what makes him happy in relation to people and if he lets others tell him who he should and shouldn't associate with based on their attributes and not their actions, that probably won't happen.
 

YliaChan

Member
As far as specifically bringing the young man back has many human-will factors since God doesn't force anyone to love. But accepting Jesus should be because you want Jesus, forgiveness and life--not so that you specifically will get back with the young man.
Of course, nobody should be forced to love. Yet he told me that there's still a feeling in his heart for me but that he's only obeying his God. He specifically said "I'm gonna obey the lord I believe in". Perhaps he's masking his feeling for his love and obedience to God?
 

Fool

ALL in all
Premium Member
@YliaChan with love all things are possible

but don't focus all that wonderful possibility onto someone who isn't accepting, or receptive.
 
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RedDragon94

Love everyone, meditate often
I am willing to sit down and start to worship God if He can bring me a miracle.
You won't ever worship him if you hold on to your boyfriend. (Matthew 16:25) Your issue is not your relationship with your guy, it's your sin. Sin causes us to be selfish and seek our earthly kingdom instead of God's. You need a new heart with God's spirit in order to get his approval. And you can't do anything to achieve that. God is not obligated to give you anything because you "worship" him. This isn't the movie Fireproof. When you choose to worship Jesus you do it with no strings attached. Would you like to know how to begin a relationship with God? If yes, I'll PM you. If no, I'll leave you here.
 

Fool

ALL in all
Premium Member
You won't ever worship him if you hold on to your boyfriend. (Matthew 16:25) Your issue is not your relationship with your guy, it's your sin. Sin causes us to be selfish and seek our earthly kingdom instead of God's. You need a new heart with God's spirit in order to get his approval. And you can't do anything to achieve that. God is not obligated to give you anything because you "worship" him. This isn't the movie Fireproof. When you choose to worship Jesus you do it with no strings attached. Would you like to know how to begin a relationship with God? If yes, I'll PM you. If no, I'll leave you here.

loving someone isn't a sin. it is in fact the perfect law.

Proverbs 16:6
Through love and faithfulness sin is atoned for; through the fear of the Lord evil is avoided.

1 Peter 4:8
Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.
 

YliaChan

Member
even if that necessarily isn't with you? we must always love and accept ourselves. we only get to keep the things we give away freely. love is being happy for someone as they are; if not harming any other directly. not how we think they should become, unless harming, oppressing, disenfranchising, marginalizing another directly.


so long as he accepts the influence of others, that isn't going to happen. he has to find what makes him happy in relation to people and if he lets others tell him who he should and shouldn't associate with based on their attributes and not their actions, that probably won't happen.
You're quite right about him letting other people influence his actions. I guess I'll have to see how it all plays out in the next couple days or weeks.
 

Kenny

Face to face with my Father
Premium Member
Of course, nobody should be forced to love. Yet he told me that there's still a feeling in his heart for me but that he's only obeying his God. He specifically said "I'm gonna obey the lord I believe in". Perhaps he's masking his feeling for his love and obedience to God?
It's hard for me to know what is going on in his head so here goes one of many possibilities.

In his heart he knows that intercourse is more than just a physical thing... there is a spirtual component so he is torn between two things... his love for you and his love for God.

No guarantees, but the best possibility is the following:

1) Consider letting Jesus come into your life and follow Him making adjustment in your lifestyle as you grow in understanding,
2) As you grow follow Jesus, by waiting for the spirital union of intimacy for after you are married
3) By growing and honoring God, this young man will then be able to love God by waiting for intimacy and still love you by getting married at the right time.
4) Get to know him from mind to mind because that is what makes a marriage work.

Just a shot in the dark (so to speak).

this is a very short version :D
 

Fool

ALL in all
Premium Member
Says Aleister Crowley!

Matthew 22:36-38 Notice what the greatest commandment is.

the first law agrees with I AM that i am, the second is perceived as other selves as i am. he who wishes to be greatest must be servant to ALL as I AM, or love All. the first is about self the 2nd is about others as self. love is omnipresent in self and other as self.


Jeremiah 23:24
Who can hide in secret places so that I cannot see them?” declares the Lord. “Do not I fill heaven and earth?” declares the Lord.

1 Corinthians 6:19
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;


Chapter I: The Knowledge Of Self

love is the key, self is not excluded. love is inclusive, not exclusive.

Luke 11:52
“Woe to you experts in the law, because you have taken away the key to knowledge. You yourselves have not entered, and you have hindered those who were entering.”
 
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Fool

ALL in all
Premium Member
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