Feeling Mad at God?

Shalom everyone.

I have a personal question to ask the users here who are Jewish. Someone committed an unspeakable crime against me when I was a child. I'm currently working through it in therapy, but as I do, I get the feeling that I will start to become upset with G-d, asking why he was not there to stop it. My question is: Is it alright to be feeling angry with G-d?

I don't think it is useful for someone to say "you can't be mad at ______". Anger is often an emotion looking for a target and often, God is the easiest target. But I think that ultimately, anger at God is not useful. It cannot be rationally countered and it can not be remediated because God isn't going to send you a fruit platter or a Hallmark card apologizing.

I think it might be helpful to reassess your relationship with God -- what are your expectations and are they fair. What is your understanding of God's role in your life vs. in the lives of the entire world? There is plenty of suffering in this world, plenty of deaths and pain and much of it seems unfair. But does that lead to a rational anger at God or an acceptance of a God who is above us and is not always understandable?

It isn't a good answer, I know. I can't apologize for God, and my words of comfort (in that I am sincerely sorry that you were a victim of anything and have felt pain) no doubt are too little and too late. I hope that on your long path in recovery, you work through that anger and have a complete healing.

I also found this -- don't know if it is any good...

Trauma, Anger and Confronting God