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Quitting your religion

Sha'irullah

رسول الآلهة
Has anyone every had issues fully quitting a religion or religious practice they were once associated with?
I happened to wake up one morning not long ago, right in time for Fajr prayer and I kept hearing the recitation of Surah Al Fatiha over and over again in my head. It was quite bothersome.
I have always been under the assumption that over the period of a year one would be completely detached from a religion and actually forget about it but for some reason I have a particularly hard time trying to deny my previous religion of Islam.
Are there any others who have experienced this feeling?
 

StarryNightshade

Spiritually confused Jew
Premium Member
For me? The answer is no. I was raised Southern Baptist and even though I thought I believed in it, I was never fully attached to it. One day, I asked myself "do I really believe in this faith?". And the answer was a solid "no".

If anything, I'd say adopting a new religion (if one does so) is more difficult than rejecting an old one; because of feelings of doubt, cultural leanings, outside influence, etc.
 
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Twilight Hue

Twilight, not bright nor dark, good nor bad.
Perhaps it's memory and recollection. It's easy to "relive" what was practiced or worshiped and what AgnosticSeeker put forth by way of adjusting to a different outlook and such.

Transition can obviously take awhile in cases. Eventually things should settle enough where it's less bothersome.
 

Treks

Well-Known Member
Sometimes I find myself humming Wiccan chants. Eko eko azarak... Darksome night and shinig moon... And I quit that path 8 years ago! I think we are the sum of our experiences. Islam was an experience for you and it will always be there, somewhere, in the back of the cupboard of your mind.
 

Quintessence

Consults with Trees
Staff member
Premium Member
I think how this plays out depends much on the circumstances and how much investment or attachment you had to the previous path. The greater the investment, the more of a mark it will leave on you. If you genuinely enjoyed your time there, the more of a mark it will leave on you. If you hated it with a passion, that hatred will leave more of a mark on you.

I look at things this way based on my own experiences. When people ask me what religion I was raised in, I tend to be evasive precisely because I'm so detached from it. It would be misleading to say I was raised in that tradition, because although I remember bits of the liturgy and I had to deprogram myself away from their god-concept, I was effectively never a meaningful part of that religious tradition. I was in it for less than ten years of my life, and I wouldn't count four of those give nobody remembers anything from before age four. It was low-investment, I didn't enjoy it, but I didn't really hate it either. It was simply not interesting to me, as I was far more interested in blazing my own trail through the territory. That's pretty much what I've done my entire life. The Neopagan label came after I learned that religious movement existed (gotta love ignorance) and going "oh, wow... this is kind of what I've been doing since I left my childhood religion." :facepalm:
 

JoeZen

Member
Was born a Catholic but quit. There I also quit my conditioning from childhood when parents taught me what to believe - today i see through my own eyes. I don't read scriptures, I don't believe in what anybody tells me : I see only the real moon - not it's reflection in the lake :)Today, My meditation has given me more bliss than ever - something which I never knew of being a Catholic
 
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MysticSang'ha

Big Squishy Hugger
Premium Member
The only thing I miss is the feeling of community. The closeness and camaraderie Christians can have with each other is really really cool.

I don't miss the orthodox theology. I find more meaning in Christian mysticism.

I'd say the same thing for Buddhism. I was a practitioner and studied for close to 18 years. The community was smaller, but was still there.

I don't miss the hierarchies developed, nor the teachings that tend to have a twinge of misogyny and homophobia.

All of my grievances are fixed when I simply get out and start talking with people, and find the connection there instead. There is no orthodoxy or heterodoxy, no doctrine or scripture, no prayer or hymn, no mantras, and no meditation practice required. Just Us.
 

Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
Has anyone every had issues fully quitting a religion or religious practice they were once associated with?

Lots of people do, but they have difficulty seeing it, because they can't see themselves as well as an outsider may be able to. Sometimes it's very difficult admitting. Parallels can be drawn to psychological drug dependence, divorces, quitting anything. Such deep impressions are a lot harder to get rid of than one may think.

Take the Messiah complex, for instance. Some people will quit Christianity, and move on to some new-age or Eastern Guru, and basically replace the Messiah with this new figure, not realising that this whole Messiah idea is a very Abrahamic belief. Anothe example is just telling everybody about the new belief. Proseltysing is a core belief in Christianity, so they keep those actions, not realising the new faith may not even believe in telling everyone. (In the Christian to Hindu switch, I see that a ton.)

"You can take the boy out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the boy."
 

Straw Dog

Well-Known Member
The Dalai Lama and other enlightened vessels have commented before about the discord caused whenever one totally uproots themselves from their cultural heritage. It unintentionally causes confusion and alienation among families. Truth is constant, but religions evolve. There is always the option of focusing on the positive aspects of one's religion while working to make internal changes in small ways. Truth can only be found within while social institutions are there to facilitate communication about Truth.
 

Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
the discord caused whenever one totally uproots themselves from their cultural heritage. It unintentionally causes confusion and alienation among families.

And this is when it's on your own volition. When it's not on your own volition, the confusion and alienation may be intentional outcomes.
 

FashionOfMyLove

Non-Conformist
I very easily rejected my old belief with out problem (Church Of England) as soon as I was old enough to make spiritual choices for myself.
 

Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
I think it's much vaguer when someone just moves to a more syncretic view.

A.. "I'm no longer a Christian."
B.. "So you no longer believe in Christ?"
A.. Oh, no. I still believe in Christ. He was a great teacher."
B.. "Uh .... okay. That's kind of a Christian belief, you know."

I had no official religion, but still a rural down-home honesty agnostic secular sort of thing going. It's been 33 years now since my official entrance into Hinduism, and 40 unofficially, and some of that past still is with me, some of it contradictory to Hinduism too. So I still say it's a lot easier said than done.
 

Penumbra

Veteran Member
Premium Member
Has anyone every had issues fully quitting a religion or religious practice they were once associated with?
I happened to wake up one morning not long ago, right in time for Fajr prayer and I kept hearing the recitation of Surah Al Fatiha over and over again in my head. It was quite bothersome.
I have always been under the assumption that over the period of a year one would be completely detached from a religion and actually forget about it but for some reason I have a particularly hard time trying to deny my previous religion of Islam.
Are there any others who have experienced this feeling?
I was raised basically with two religions due to parents with different beliefs: Roman Catholicism and a sort of liberal New Age panentheism type of religion.

Leaving Catholicism was easy for me; I just didn't show up anymore. I never had emotional attachment to it nor did I believe most of it anyway.

Leaving the other religion was a bit more of a process because losing a belief in a loving deity felt much like losing a friend. Actually it would be a bit more emotionally difficult to determine that a friend never existed than to lose her, so it was more like that.
 
I just left the Watchtower Organization, which means that I am no longer a Jehovah's Witness. Leaving this Organization is not so easy and has probably more consequences than leaving any common denomination.
When one is disfellowshipped due to serious immorality e.g., or when one disassociates oneself due to doubts in Watchtower teachings, then that person is officially "shunned".
Some people don't believe that shunning is still practiced in our days, at least not effectively. Not so. Besides the Amish group, only Jehovah's Witnesses carry out the most radical shunning practice of all religions that refer to the bible as authority.

The moment you leave, no Witness is allowed to talk to you anymore, or even to look into your direction. All your friends and often the rest of your family that remain in this cult are told to consider you dead. There are no relationships, no opportunities to talk and no feeling of any kind of being worthy for living left.

I don't write that in order to be pitied, but in order to make people aware of such current, dangerous practices that often end in depression and suicide.

My advice for anyone who is interested in the Watchtower teachings: do intensive research!

LovingChild
 

Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
My advice for anyone who is interested in the Watchtower teachings: do intensive research!

LovingChild

Thank you for this. I had a colleague once who quit (somehow) but his wife stayed in. They eventually divorced, but there was a time there when he was out she was in, and there was no shunning by her at least. So do cases vary?
 
Thank you for this. I had a colleague once who quit (somehow) but his wife stayed in. They eventually divorced, but there was a time there when he was out she was in, and there was no shunning by her at least. So do cases vary?

Dear Vinayaka,

there are strict rules that have to be obeyed by members. If I understand you right the not yet divorced Witness-wife did not shun her husband who left? In that case the elders tell couples who still live together and are still married that the remaining Witness may speak to the spouse who left, only for necessary issues. If there are children, they both still may care for them, but the non-Witness is not allowed to participate in family worship. I don't know the specific circumstances of your colleague, but to outstanding people those restrictions are not all visible. And also it might be that the wife still hoped to convince her husband to return to the Organization and tried to do so by forbidden communication. The fact that they finally divorced shows me once more that the immense mind-control of the Watchtower prefers to destroy families rather than promote love!
 

Sha'irullah

رسول الآلهة
The last time I heard of Jehovah's Witnesses it was more like a cult. I have a friend I met who mentioned his upbringing in the faith. I had no idea such things happened within it since I knew of others who try proselytizing in my city. I then began reading so many stories about it and realized it has a very bad reputation. I guess I am more ignorant on the things that happen within the Christian community after my departure.
I do not criticize the people of a faith unless they behave negatively. But I always criticize religions. True Christianity is non-denominational Christianity like I learned. This mandate on The Church is entirely stupid as nobody can tell exactly which church is the one ordained by the Bible. The Church is nothing else but the collective Christians if you ask me.
 
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