Here, I'll respond to both of you at once.
My response to your criticisms is complex, but as far as it concerns me personally, I feel that I must leave lots of room for you to be right. Let me put it this way: for the last few days, what I've been defending is a significant portion of American Jewry that legitimately feels this way. I have felt that your responses have been too condemning for a recognized denomination, with its own seminary, youth programs, and nationwide organization. That is why I have defended them so adamantly, often pulling in resources over which I have no mastery to try and do so.
However, as I take your responses increasingly personally, as I am forced to be more creative and insert more of my own beliefs as you push me further, I have begun to observe major flaws in my way of thinking. It's as if I put up subconscious defenses against every religious teaching against egoism that I have ever heard, accepting them intellectually but preventing them from integrating into my worldview. Only this can account for my failure to realize that, for someone who affirmatively believes in God such as myself (which actually sets me apart from a lot of Reconstructionists I know), truth, knowledge, and authority can only come from outside myself. I half-realized this, so I created an elaborate logical ruse which gave the appearance that my morality was derived from the outside, but it placed the final word with my powers of observation. Had I consistently followed my logic that all creation is God's expression, I would have realized that any hierarchy I constructed for that creation would have been false. It is not within my authority to say that the rest of creation is more significant than the Torah.
With that in mind, the conclusion that I come to is that I don't know, but the fear of not knowing is surely a call to find out. I have to study. Binyamin, if you are my age, I'm sure you could tell me that the rabbis insist that Jews of our age study and surround ourselves with more learned people as much as possible. At my secular schools, and since we left the Traditional synagoguge (which I can safely say would not have been the right place for me), I have not had that opportunity. Next semester, though, I am doing just that.
It is a comfort to know that I am still living out God's will, and that it will simply become easier and more apparent as my life goes on. Perhaps Torah is the way for me, perhaps not. It would be foolish to say for certain, but I know that I am compelled to approach it and find out.