Church constitution

john63 · Jan 7, 2006

I thought I had found the perfect Church and I was ready to join them. They believe the exact same things as I do. Then the Pastor handed me a copy of the church's constitution and by laws. Article 2 Section R of the constitution reads as follows:

(R) Divorce and Marriage. We believe that God disaproves of and forbids divorce and intends marriage to last until one of the spouses dies. Divorce and remarriage is Biblically regarded as adultery. Although divorced and remarried persons or divorced persons may hold positions of service in the church and be greatly used of God for Christian service, they may not be considered for the offices of pastor or deacon. The church will not condone nor conduct any marriage cerimony that involves a divorced person. The church will marry only those individuals who are members in good standing with the church and are holding the ceremony at the church. (Mal. 2:14-17, Matt. 19:3-12, Rom. 7:1-3, 1 Tim 3:2-12, Titus 1:6)

I am a divorced, remarried, and divorced again person. What this is telling me (and I called the Pastor and he told me I was correct) is I have to remain single and celibate for the rest of my life. They also do not consider me as worthy as a biblically married person. I am not eligible to hold the office of pastor or deacon. This tells me that they do not consider me an equal.

Katzpur · Jan 8, 2006

john63 said:
I thought I had found the perfect Church and I was ready to join them. They believe the exact same things as I do. Then the Pastor handed me a copy of the church's constitution and by laws. Article 2 Section R of the constitution reads as follows:

(R) Divorce and Marriage. We believe that God disaproves of and forbids divorce and intends marriage to last until one of the spouses dies. Divorce and remarriage is Biblically regarded as adultery. Although divorced and remarried persons or divorced persons may hold positions of service in the church and be greatly used of God for Christian service, they may not be considered for the offices of pastor or deacon. The church will not condone nor conduct any marriage cerimony that involves a divorced person. The church will marry only those individuals who are members in good standing with the church and are holding the ceremony at the church. (Mal. 2:14-17, Matt. 19:3-12, Rom. 7:1-3, 1 Tim 3:2-12, Titus 1:6)

I am a divorced, remarried, and divorced again person. What this is telling me (and I called the Pastor and he told me I was correct) is I have to remain single and celibate for the rest of my life. They also do not consider me as worthy as a biblically married person. I am not eligible to hold the office of pastor or deacon. This tells me that they do not consider me an equal.

I'm confused here, John. I thought you were considering joining the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-say Saints. We don't even have a "Constitution and Bylaws," nor do we have "Pastors." Also, we have many people in our Church who have been divorced and re-married. We definitely don't consider it to be adultery. What's up anyway?

Kathryn

Buttons* · Jan 8, 2006

john63 said:
I thought I had found the perfect Church and I was ready to join them. They believe the exact same things as I do. Then the Pastor handed me a copy of the church's constitution and by laws. Article 2 Section R of the constitution reads as follows:

(R) Divorce and Marriage. We believe that God disaproves of and forbids divorce and intends marriage to last until one of the spouses dies. Divorce and remarriage is Biblically regarded as adultery. Although divorced and remarried persons or divorced persons may hold positions of service in the church and be greatly used of God for Christian service, they may not be considered for the offices of pastor or deacon. The church will not condone nor conduct any marriage cerimony that involves a divorced person. The church will marry only those individuals who are members in good standing with the church and are holding the ceremony at the church. (Mal. 2:14-17, Matt. 19:3-12, Rom. 7:1-3, 1 Tim 3:2-12, Titus 1:6)

I am a divorced, remarried, and divorced again person. What this is telling me (and I called the Pastor and he told me I was correct) is I have to remain single and celibate for the rest of my life. They also do not consider me as worthy as a biblically married person. I am not eligible to hold the office of pastor or deacon. This tells me that they do not consider me an equal.

I'm sorry, thats really dissapointing. If people all have the potential to have the same "sins" then why isnt everyone equal?

robtex · Jan 8, 2006

If yall get a chance go to biblegateway.com and google the passages. Interesting reads.
http://www.biblegateway.com/

dawny0826 · Jan 8, 2006

john63 said:
I thought I had found the perfect Church and I was ready to join them. They believe the exact same things as I do. Then the Pastor handed me a copy of the church's constitution and by laws. Article 2 Section R of the constitution reads as follows:

(R) Divorce and Marriage. We believe that God disaproves of and forbids divorce and intends marriage to last until one of the spouses dies. Divorce and remarriage is Biblically regarded as adultery. Although divorced and remarried persons or divorced persons may hold positions of service in the church and be greatly used of God for Christian service, they may not be considered for the offices of pastor or deacon. The church will not condone nor conduct any marriage cerimony that involves a divorced person. The church will marry only those individuals who are members in good standing with the church and are holding the ceremony at the church. (Mal. 2:14-17, Matt. 19:3-12, Rom. 7:1-3, 1 Tim 3:2-12, Titus 1:6)

I am a divorced, remarried, and divorced again person. What this is telling me (and I called the Pastor and he told me I was correct) is I have to remain single and celibate for the rest of my life. They also do not consider me as worthy as a biblically married person. I am not eligible to hold the office of pastor or deacon. This tells me that they do not consider me an equal.

Yikes!

I don't know...the whole idea of "church constitution" kind of rubs me the wrong way. I'm NOT going to argue with scripture. I know what the scripture says. But your decisions concerning marriage and divorce are between you and Christ. And the last time I checked...when we repent...we're forgiven. I don't know if I feel comfortable with the idea of members of a church denying me the opportunity to pursue an office, which perhaps I'm called to fulfill based upon my past sins.

I suppose they reserve the right to do so and again, I won't dispute the scripture. But your marital history (for lack of a better term

) is between you and Christ. I don't feel the officials of a church have the authority to judge you for your sins by deeming you either "biblically worthy" or "biblically unworthy". You became an equal, in God's eyes, the moment you accepted Christ.

Master Vigil · Jan 8, 2006

I can't help but wander which church this was. Do tell??

YmirGF · Jan 8, 2006

john63 said:
I thought I had found the perfect Church and I was ready to join them.

I am a divorced, remarried, and divorced again person. What this is telling me (and I called the Pastor and he told me I was correct) is I have to remain single and celibate for the rest of my life. They also do not consider me as worthy as a biblically married person. I am not eligible to hold the office of pastor or deacon. This tells me that they do not consider me an equal.

I feel for ya John63. That would be rather disappointing, but better you found out now than after you have joined the congregation.

It may sound silly John63, but I used to use an old sales gimmick on my staff to keep them pumped up. Many here will no doubt remember either saying this or hearing it.
With every rejection you get, you are one step closer to getting a sale.

I think you could safely apply this in your experience. Keep your chin up, you obviously know what you are looking for... just keep looking.

Think of it this way. You already believe the "right" people are out there. Now all you have to do is find them.

dawny0826 · Jan 8, 2006

YmirGF said:
I feel for ya John63. That would be rather disappointing, but better you found out now than after you have joined the congregation.

It may sound silly John63, but I used to use an old sales gimmick on my staff to keep them pumped up. Many here will no doubt remember either saying this or hearing it.
With every rejection you get, you are one step closer to getting a sale.

I think you could safely apply this in your experience. Keep your chin up, you obviously know what you are looking for... just keep looking. Think of it this way. You already believe the "right" people are out there. Now all you have to do is find them.

Well said...I think that's great advice.

Terrywoodenpic · Jan 8, 2006

Some anglican priests will not re-marry divirced people.

[font=Arial, Helvetica][/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica]Reluctant clergy [/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica]Many people whose marriages end in divorce marry again. And many of them want their second marriage to take place in a church, with holy blessing. [/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica]But not many achieve their desire, because relatively few clergy will agree to marry divorced people. If marriage really is indissoluble, they argue, there can be no remarriage. [/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica]This traditionalist line is the church's official position. And all the new booklet has to say about remarriage in church is to restate the current discouragement of it. [/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica]"Should the church as a whole decide upon an alternative, it will be on exactly the same principles that have guided it up to this point - that marriage is an unconditional commitment for life. [/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica]"A further marriage after a divorce is an exceptional act, not a routine one.[/font]

extracted from http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/451898.stm

I think we have reached a point where a proper rethink is needed.
After all, we agree that all other sins and trangressions are forgiven by God, on repentance.
I am sure Re-marriage fits that view of forgiveness as well.

Terry___________________
Blessed are the merciful, mercy shall be shown unto them.

[font=Arial, Helvetica][/font]

michel · Jan 8, 2006

john63 said:
I thought I had found the perfect Church and I was ready to join them. They believe the exact same things as I do. Then the Pastor handed me a copy of the church's constitution and by laws. Article 2 Section R of the constitution reads as follows:

(R) Divorce and Marriage. We believe that God disaproves of and forbids divorce and intends marriage to last until one of the spouses dies. Divorce and remarriage is Biblically regarded as adultery. Although divorced and remarried persons or divorced persons may hold positions of service in the church and be greatly used of God for Christian service, they may not be considered for the offices of pastor or deacon. The church will not condone nor conduct any marriage cerimony that involves a divorced person. The church will marry only those individuals who are members in good standing with the church and are holding the ceremony at the church. (Mal. 2:14-17, Matt. 19:3-12, Rom. 7:1-3, 1 Tim 3:2-12, Titus 1:6)

I am a divorced, remarried, and divorced again person. What this is telling me (and I called the Pastor and he told me I was correct) is I have to remain single and celibate for the rest of my life. They also do not consider me as worthy as a biblically married person. I am not eligible to hold the office of pastor or deacon. This tells me that they do not consider me an equal.

As with the others, I feel for you. And I can honestly say with Empathy - I can never find a Religion in which I can 'fit' snugly, and accept everyone of their tenets.

Having been on this forum, we are certainly not the only ones.

You must have been disappointed, and possibly quite hurt. I guess for me, I will always be 'on my own', but, again from others' experiences on this forum, Maybe you can find hapiness in some 'Niche' that has the least contradictions with what you personally feel.

jeffrey · Jan 8, 2006

Which church are you refering to? I now the Catholic Church has similar laws, or rules. They must confirm my ex was sleeping around on me before they will validate my marriage to Rebecca. That shouldn't be hard to do though. My ex's name is wrote on many a bathroom stall. 'For a good time call....'

john63 · Jan 8, 2006

Master Vigil said:
I can't help but wander which church this was. Do tell??

Westbrook Baptist Church

john63 · Jan 8, 2006

Katzpur said:
I'm confused here, John. I thought you were considering joining the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-say Saints. We don't even have a "Constitution and Bylaws," nor do we have "Pastors." Also, we have many people in our Church who have been divorced and re-married. We definitely don't consider it to be adultery. What's up anyway?

Kathryn

Yes Katzpur I'm still reading the BoM, but I have a long way to go. I can't be baptised because I'm still smoking cigs. I'm having a real hard time trying to kick that vice. At this point I really don't know. This decision has been much harder than I thougth even a few weeks ago. The more I explore the harder it gets to reach a decsion.

jeffrey · Jan 8, 2006

John, I'll pray that God leads you. Let me say this. No matter what church you decide to follow, when it's right, you will know it. Reread michel's post. Excellent advice.

robtex · Jan 8, 2006

John63 do you feel the Bible is the inerrant word of God (which version of the Bible is you say yes) or the inspired word of God? I s it a book written of man about their faith in God or other?

It is hard to get a wrangle on this without knowing your view of the Bible when you walk into a particular church.

YmirGF · Jan 8, 2006

michel said:
I can never find a Religion in which I can 'fit' snugly, and accept everyone of their tenets.

Having been on this forum, we are certainly not the only ones.

I guess for me, I will always be 'on my own'

At the risk of soundling like your parrot, I can only echo the same sentiments Michel. It is not easy "going it alone", but I feel it is potentially far more rewarding.

jeffrey · Jan 8, 2006

YmirGF said:
At the risk of soundling like your parrot, I can only echo the same sentiments Michel. It is not easy "going it alone", but I feel it is potentially far more rewarding.

I agree with you and michel. That's the path my wife chooses to follow.

john63 · Jan 8, 2006

robtex said:
John63 do you feel the Bible is the inerrant word of God (which version of the Bible is you say yes) or the inspired word of God? I s it a book written of man about their faith in God or other?

It is hard to get a wrangle on this without knowing your view of the Bible when you walk into a particular church.

I believe it is the inspired Word of God.

opensoul7 · Jan 8, 2006

Will you ever find the equality you have in Freemasonry anywhere else ?

Bishka · Jan 8, 2006

john63 said:
Yes Katzpur I'm still reading the BoM, but I have a long way to go. I can't be baptised because I'm still smoking cigs. I'm having a real hard time trying to kick that vice. At this point I really don't know. This decision has been much harder than I thougth even a few weeks ago. The more I explore the harder it gets to reach a decsion.

You don't mind if I pray for you, do you? If you want help stopping smoking?!? If not just tell me to screw off.

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