Is Jealousy a Sign of Love?

Sunstone · Nov 30, 2005

I've always thought that jealousy was more a sign of possessiveness than of love. But someone once "corrected" me on that: She said that any true love included an element of jealousy. I never bought her "correction" and still don't believe jealousy indicates love more than it does possessiveness. But what do you think? Is jealousy a sign of true love? Or is it more a sign of possessiveness? Or something else altogether?

michel · Nov 30, 2005

Sunstone said:
I've always thought that jealousy was more a sign of possessiveness than of love. But someone once "corrected" me on that: She said that any true love included an element of jealousy. I never bought her "correction" and still don't believe jealousy indicates love more than it does possessiveness. But what do you think? Is jealousy a sign of true love? Or is it more a sign of possessiveness? Or something else altogether?

I see Jealousy as more of a case of insecurity; perhaps possessiveness sometimes. But true Love ?; not in my book.

Terrywoodenpic · Nov 30, 2005

I would say possessiveness. with more than a touch of disregard for the feelings of the other person.

Terry_______________________
Amen! Truly I say to you: Gather in my name. I am with you.

turk179 · Nov 30, 2005

michel said:
I see Jealousy as more of a case of insecurity; perhaps possessiveness sometimes. But true Love ?; not in my book.

I agree with michel. To me jealousy is caused more by insecurities and self doubt. Sometimes this can lead to possessiveness because that person is afraid of loosing their significant other due to their insecurities. I can't possibly see this as an indication of ones love for another person.

jeffrey · Nov 30, 2005

michel said:
I see Jealousy as more of a case of insecurity; perhaps possessiveness sometimes. But true Love ?; not in my book.

You and Orion beat me to it! I know I've been jealous over things in the past. Stupid things. But at times, I'm insecure. If the person your with gives you confidence, the jealousy fades away.

Sunstone · Nov 30, 2005

Have you ever known someone to confuse their strong feelings of jealousy with love? I believe I've seen that happen several times to different people. And in nearly every case, there was no talking the deluded person out of their conviction that they truly loved someone. Has anyone else noticed this sort of thing?

michel · Nov 30, 2005

jgallandt said:
You and Orion beat me to it! I know I've been jealous over things in the past. Stupid things. But at times, I'm insecure. If the person your with gives you confidence, the jealousy fades away.

If the person your with gives you confidence, the jealousy fades away.

Thats lovely, I had never thought of that............

turk179 · Nov 30, 2005

Sunstone said:
Have you ever known someone to confuse their strong feelings of jealousy with love? I believe I've seen that happen several times to different people. And in nearly every case, there was no talking the deluded person out of their conviction that they truly loved someone. Has anyone else noticed this sort of thing?

Sounds like the start of an abusive relationship.

nutshell · Nov 30, 2005

Ditto to all of the above. Jealousy has no place in true love.

Sunstone · Nov 30, 2005

0rion said:
Sounds like the start of an abusive relationship.

BINGO!

Sunstone · Nov 30, 2005

Can jealousy be perfectly eliminated, or is it something that there will always be a bit of, and the best we can do is to manage it well?

michel · Nov 30, 2005

Sunstone said:
Can jealousy be perfectly eliminated, or is it something that there will always be a bit of, and the best we can do is to manage it well?

Well, JGallandt's post#5

I know I've been jealous over things in the past. Stupid things. But at times, I'm insecure. If the person your with gives you confidence, the jealousy fades away.

Another question; could it be a form of control, as well ?

maggie2 · Nov 30, 2005

I agree with jealousy is about insecurity and possessiveness.

turk179 · Nov 30, 2005

michel said:
Another question; could it be a form of control, as well ?

Absolutely. Unfortunately in another lifetime I have used jealousy as a form of control. At the time I did not think of it that way but in the end my jealousy got me what I wanted. I look back at my reaction to the situation and I realize that I was very insecure about myself. Gee I feel like a bit of a looser now
Now that I think about it. Jealousy can be a form of control and it can also be controlling to the person feeling the jealousy.

Scuba Pete · Nov 30, 2005

Jealousy comes from selfishness. You are focused on your possible loss and NOT on the person involved.

groovydancer88 · Nov 30, 2005

Love = Trust (at least in my book)
Jealousy = Mistrust

Bangbang · Nov 30, 2005

Exodus 20:5
You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me,
Exodus 20:4-6 (in Context) Exodus 20 (Whole Chapter)
Exodus 34:14
Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.
Exodus 34:13-15 (in Context) Exodus 34 (Whole Chapter)
Deuteronomy 4:24
For the LORD your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God.
Deuteronomy 4:23-25 (in Context) Deuteronomy 4 (Whole Chapter)
Deuteronomy 5:9
You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me,
Deuteronomy 5:8-10 (in Context) Deuteronomy 5 (Whole Chapter)
Deuteronomy 6:15
for the LORD your God, who is among you, is a jealous God and his anger will burn against you, and he will destroy you from the face of the land.
Deuteronomy 6:14-16 (in Context) Deuteronomy 6 (Whole Chapter)
Joshua 24:19
Joshua said to the people, "You are not able to serve the LORD. He is a holy God; he is a jealous God. He will not forgive your rebellion and your sins.
Joshua 24:18-20 (in Context) Joshua 24 (Whole Chapter)

jeffrey · Nov 30, 2005

michel said:
Another question; could it be a form of control, as well ?

I believe jealousy can lead to control. My wife has a friend back in England, who's boyfriend is so jealous that she is not permitted to drive a car, go on the pc unless he is there, reads all her email, tells her what to wear... the list goes on...

turk179 · Nov 30, 2005

jgallandt said:
I believe jealousy can lead to control. My wife has a friend back in England, who's boyfriend is so jealous that she is not permitted to drive a car, go on the pc unless he is there, reads all her email, tells her what to wear... the list goes on...

I feel sorry for your wife's friend. To have to go through ones life like you are in a federal prison is not my idea of a loving relationship.

Darkdale · Dec 1, 2005

Sunstone said:
I've always thought that jealousy was more a sign of possessiveness than of love. But someone once "corrected" me on that: She said that any true love included an element of jealousy. I never bought her "correction" and still don't believe jealousy indicates love more than it does possessiveness. But what do you think? Is jealousy a sign of true love? Or is it more a sign of possessiveness? Or something else altogether?

I'd say it is a sign of possessiveness and insecurity.

Is Jealousy a Sign of Love?

De Diablo Del Fora

Administrator Emeritus

Oldest Heretic

I smell something....

â Ãig Dogâ

De Diablo Del Fora

Administrator Emeritus

I smell something....

Well-Known Member

De Diablo Del Fora

De Diablo Del Fora

Administrator Emeritus

Active Member

I smell something....

Le plongeur avec attitude...

Active Member

Active Member

â Ãig Dogâ

I smell something....

World Leader Pretend

â Ãig Dogâ

â Ãig Dogâ