The shell

[PoetPhilosopher]

Some people kind of encouraged me to "get outside my own shell" more. I've tried to. And once outside my own shell, I realized all the senses and feelings I experienced. It was like I was becoming an empath, opening myself up that much, and with all the emotions and insecurities that come with it.

I actually prefer the comfort of my shell, and I'm kind of trying to go back to that now - while still learning what works, what doesn't, in life, and not going back to old mistakes and old ideas which are proven incorrect. But still keeping the shell part of it.

I think I just pushed myself out of my shell too soon and too fast, as well.... I've really been incorporating myself into society a bit more lately, taking on tasks for others, attempting teamwork in other parts of my life, and I found it stressful.

I have since cut back, and realized, maybe being a little reserved and "to myself" is okay sometimes.

About my "leaving / taking a break" thread I made a few days ago - I may explain more about things later, but at the time, I was feeling a bit emotional due to all the different tasks I was taking on in life - not all of them RF - but I felt I was making my life too crammed and full to the point where, despite things going in my opinion pretty good, I wasn't enjoying things, or stopping to smell the roses. I have since cut back. Whether that allows me more time for RF, we'll see.

 

[Exaltist Ethan]

You are in no way obligated to be in, or outside your shell, like you are not obligated to post here everyday. I realize that every day is going to be different and you are going to have to find a healthy balance between your personal and public life. I just wish I had the option to get out of my shell. I chose a live which I'm fully sustainable just being in my apartment most of the time and it drives me crazy. I want to break through that shell but besides taking the occasional walk I haven't found any other meaningful activities outside or with people I know in real life. But this thread isn't about me, it's about you. I just hope you learn from my mistake and don't build walls where bridges are being built right now. Being inside your shell too long can drive anyone crazy, I know this because it encouraged my development of bipolar disorder. I'm in my shell all the time because I have bipolar, I have bipolar because I'm in my shell all the time. Just don't become too depressed or anxious if you need some quality personal time either.

 

[PoetPhilosopher]

You are in no way obligated to be in, or outside your shell, like you are not obligated to post here everyday. I realize that every day is going to be different and you are going to have to find a healthy balance between your personal and public life. I just wish I had the option to get out of my shell. I chose a live which I'm fully sustainable just being in my apartment most of the time and it drives me crazy. I want to break through that shell but besides taking the occasional walk I haven't found any other meaningful activities outside or with people I know in real life. But this thread isn't about me, it's about you. I just hope you learn from my mistake and don't build walls where bridges are being built right now. Being inside your shell too long can drive anyone crazy, I know this because it encouraged my development of bipolar disorder. I'm in my shell all the time because I have bipolar, I have bipolar because I'm in my shell all the time. Just don't become too depressed or anxious if you need some quality personal time either.

Thanks for the post. Gives me some things to think about.

As for whether I'll post every day - I probably won't. I took a 4 day break from RF recently, and I'm feeling a little refreshed from that, but I still have some other stuff to get done, too.

 

[JustGeorge]

Nothing wrong with enjoying one's shell.

I prefer quieter activities myself. Its hard to explain to people I'm extroverted, as low key as I can be. I need to be around people in order to function well, even though I'm quiet and don't like crowds. I'd much prefer to enjoy a bowl of ice cream with another person as opposed to a crowd. I really don't enjoy the ice cream as much alone. Its a balance...

Only you know what works for you. Others can push you to do this or that, because it makes them happy so they assume it will do the same for you, but that's not necessarily true. If you've tried something and found it wasn't for you, there's no shame in retreating to what you know you enjoy.

The only problem one could have with being in a shell is when they're unable to break out, even though they want to. It doesn't seem to be the case for you.

 

[Ella S.]

It's important to be able to accept and process the emotions that we're feeling so that we don't, for example, spend an entire month performing sub-optimally because we haven't addressed our subconscious terrors.

I've noticed that this doesn't mean I have to change who I am and suddenly express all of that emotion and sentiment. I can keep it to myself, even though I've now discovered its depths. I learned that this year

 

[The Sum of Awe]

I just wanted to offer a different perspective. If you’ve been inside your shell for so long, it’ll definitely feel cold and uncomfortable once you pop out of it. It takes much time for the swelling of your soul to dwindle down after being in your shell for so long, but it does over time if you’re willing to endure the discomfort for the greater long term rewards. There is always that comfort that calls from the shell, that maybe that’s where we belong - we’re so used to it after all.

In the end it’s entirely up to you. I did find comfort in my shell as well, but not peace of mind. It took about a year for me of consistently battling the discomfort of expressing myself more, socially, to even begin to feel more comfortable doing it. And it will take more time to fully become comfortable. But by now it’s not worth it to return to the shell for me.

It is good to not drive yourself mad with discomfort, but it is also good to think if being in this shell will get you where you desire to go. And perhaps you could find a middle way like George was saying, enjoying the company of few not the many. Finding your people is good for that.