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Sexism Against Men

Debater Slayer

Vipassana
Staff member
Premium Member
What are some major examples of sexism you've seen first-hand against men or boys?

Personally, these are the two main ones I've witnessed:

- Conscription. Aside from the fact that it is enforced on men only where I live (I support abolishing it rather than enforcing it on both sexes, just to be clear), I also saw multiple people in service who should have never been accepted but had their issues brushed aside anyway and were expected to be "manly" and not complain or show any signs of vulnerability.

This included a schizophrenic who was in the same barracks as I was as well as me with my own issues (depression and high foot arches that led to inflamed tendons and made me limp while walking). Because we were supposed to be "manly," we and other conscripts who often needed rest received a lot of scolding comments, sometimes seriously and sometimes half-jokingly.

- The expectation and assumption that men should be able to endure more physical difficulty than women by default without accounting for possible (but invisible) health issues. This sometimes also connects to the idea that men shouldn't complain about pain or health issues, especially mental ones, or else they're being "unmanly."

Share your experiences or examples you've encountered of sexism that primarily targets and harms men.
 

Rival

Si m'ait Dieus
Staff member
Premium Member
The idea that all boys/men like sexual attention from women and it's somehow not uncomfortable for him. Women will routinely just approach men without regard.

I find many 'jokes' about what women would like to do to their husbands to be in poor taste, especially considering if many were the other way around they'd basically be socially banned. Women make these kinds of jokes all the time.

The idea that boys/men are filthy, unwashed, don't do any cleaning etc., but women are somehow the epitome of hygiene. I can't say I've come across many filthy boys in my time, or boys who didn't wear clean clothes or wash their hair. It's simply not true. I've heard many folks make these kinds of comments. Never actually seen many if any examples.
 
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Stevicus

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
What are some major examples of sexism you've seen first-hand against men or boys?

Personally, these are the two main ones I've witnessed:

- Conscription. Aside from the fact that it is enforced on men only where I live (I support abolishing it rather than enforcing it on both sexes, just to be clear), I also saw multiple people in service who should have never been accepted but had their issues brushed aside anyway and were expected to be "manly" and not complain or show any signs of vulnerability.

This included a schizophrenic who was in the same barracks as I was as well as me with my own issues (depression and high foot arches that led to inflamed tendons and made me limp while walking). Because we were supposed to be "manly," we and other conscripts who often needed rest received a lot of scolding comments, sometimes seriously and sometimes half-jokingly.

- The expectation and assumption that men should be able to endure more physical difficulty than women by default without accounting for possible (but invisible) health issues. This sometimes also connects to the idea that men shouldn't complain about pain or health issues, especially mental ones, or else they're being "unmanly."

Share your experiences or examples you've encountered of sexism that primarily targets and harms men.

I've seen examples where men have been painted with a broad brush, as if we're all a bunch of Neanderthals, uncouth, brutish, violent, sloppy, or that we "only have one thing on our minds" (sex).

Of course, men pressure other men into being "manly," and fathers might also pressure their sons. One might commonly hear things like "Be a man" or "Take it like a man." I've even heard women say things like this to men, but it's considered sexist to tell a woman to "act like a lady."

Back during the 70s, the "sensitive male" was cultivated and somewhat encouraged, but there seemed to be a kind of backlash against that. Prior to that "being a man" probably meant something more like conforming to a certain expected societal norm, which was probably closer to Ward Cleaver than Rambo.

But then from the 80s beyond, "being a man" seemed to take on a different meaning, like some kind of overly dramatic machismo which seemed more of an act, performing for an audience. Instead of the archetype of John Wayne, it turned into something more like Hulk Hogan. It's become more of a parody than anything real.
 

Rival

Si m'ait Dieus
Staff member
Premium Member
But then from the 80s beyond, "being a man" seemed to take on a different meaning, like some kind of overly dramatic machismo which seemed more of an act, performing for an audience. Instead of the archetype of John Wayne, it turned into something more like Hulk Hogan. It's become more of a parody than anything real.
Many 80s and 90s films seem to have very overly-masculine depictions of men.
 

Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
I don't consider it sexism, but making (false) generalisations about the male mind. In reality, the male mind varies a lot between each of us, just as humans in general do.

I think the soft spoken male gets subjected to it more. I like flowers, I like to cook, and no I don't always have one thing on my mind.

Generalisations are often useful, but they don't help people of that group who don't fit the generalisation.
 

PoetPhilosopher

Veteran Member
A lot of women around my area think that not only men should be the provider, but provide for the both of them. While these women sometimes have jobs, they often plan to quit their jobs as soon as they develop a long, stable relationship with a man. Should the man lose his job, they then look at it almost like a type of infidelity and consider leaving the man if he doesn't get a new one soon.
 

Wildswanderer

Veteran Member
What are some major examples of sexism you've seen first-hand against men or boys?

Personally, these are the two main ones I've witnessed:

- Conscription. Aside from the fact that it is enforced on men only where I live (I support abolishing it rather than enforcing it on both sexes, just to be clear), I also saw multiple people in service who should have never been accepted but had their issues brushed aside anyway and were expected to be "manly" and not complain or show any signs of vulnerability.

This included a schizophrenic who was in the same barracks as I was as well as me with my own issues (depression and high foot arches that led to inflamed tendons and made me limp while walking). Because we were supposed to be "manly," we and other conscripts who often needed rest received a lot of scolding comments, sometimes seriously and sometimes half-jokingly.

- The expectation and assumption that men should be able to endure more physical difficulty than women by default without accounting for possible (but invisible) health issues. This sometimes also connects to the idea that men shouldn't complain about pain or health issues, especially mental ones, or else they're being "unmanly."

Share your experiences or examples you've encountered of sexism that primarily targets and harms men.
Um.. it seems to me you're just relating experiences from the military, that would probably be the same regardless of the person's gender. The military by definition has to have a certain sort of people to operate efficiently. But of course mistakes are made, and people who should not have made the cut do.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Wanderer From Afar
Premium Member
The idea that all boys/men like sexual attention from women and it's somehow not uncomfortable for him. Women will routinely just approach men without regard.
That attitude led to me getting sexually assaulted by some woman at a concert and some other woman who saw it literally just shrugged. But if I did the same to that woman what she did to me, I'd be arrested.
 

PoetPhilosopher

Veteran Member
A lot of women around my area think that not only men should be the provider, but provide for the both of them. While these women sometimes have jobs, they often plan to quit their jobs as soon as they develop a long, stable relationship with a man. Should the man lose his job, they then look at it almost like a type of infidelity and consider leaving the man if he doesn't get a new one soon.

I should elaborate that I do tend to appreciate traditional gender roles, provided that they aren't forced on others. However, the extent to which these women take this, is a bit more severe than I ever would.
 

Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
I should elaborate that I do tend to appreciate traditional gender roles, provided that they aren't forced on others. However, the extent to which these women take this, is a bit more severe than I ever would.

We decided, together, that the kids would be better off if Mom stayed at home, and we split the duties along those traditional roles. I took some heat from some female colleagues for it, despite it being a totally joint decision. One of us was going to stay home, but I was the more educated at the time, so I worked. Boss didn't get along too well with those types, as they criticized her too. Some folks have powerful noses that drag the rest of the body and mind into other peoples' businesses.
 
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Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
Male victims of rape and domestic abuse are regularly airbrushed from the conversation so as to avoid making it about men.
This is reinforced on TV, where TV police shows routinely
have cops threaten men with prison where they'll be punished
with being raped....even ostensibly progressive shows like
Law & Order.
The show Murphy Brown was very woke regarding wrongful
treatment of women in the workplace. But she thought it OK
to grab her male co-worker's crotch in one episode. Frank's
grimace was hilarious, as emphasized by the laugh track.
(I couldn't find the video clip.)
A thing to watch for....
We know it's wrong for men to hit women for saying the
wrong thing. Watch for women slapping (or worse) men
for saying something that offends them. It's portrayed as
justified & empowering.
 

Yerda

Veteran Member
That attitude led to me getting sexually assaulted by some woman at a concert and some other woman who saw it literally just shrugged. But if I did the same to that woman what she did to me, I'd be arrested.
I worked bars for years when I was younger and I had a fair few occasions where drunk women did stuff that would have gotten a man launched out the door face first, at the very least. People found it funny.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Wanderer From Afar
Premium Member
I worked bars for years when I was younger and I had a fair few occasions where drunk women did stuff that would have gotten a man launched out the door face first, at the very least. People found it funny.
I just wish I could go back in time and punch the ***** in the face. I'd happily be arrested for standing up for myself, if it came to that. I'm still disgusted over it.
 

Rival

Si m'ait Dieus
Staff member
Premium Member
This is reinforced on TV, where TV police shows routinely
have cops threaten men with prison where they'll be punished
with being raped....even ostensibly progressive shows like
Law & Order.
The show Murphy Brown was very woke regarding wrongful
treatment of women in the workplace. But this character
grabbed her male co-worker's crotch in one episode. Frank's
grimace was hilarious, as emphasized by the laugh track.
Reminds me of the men-are-idiots trope seen in nearly every US adult cartoon. See: Peter Griffin; Homer Simpson; multiple South Park men; Stan from American Dad could also count.
 

Yerda

Veteran Member
I just wish I could go back in time and punch the ***** in the face. I'd happily be arrested for standing up for myself, if it came to that. I'm still disgusted over it.
I wish rather than saying, please don't do that, and politely getting on with it I'd asked where they thought they got the right to put hands wherever they wanted.
 

Saint Frankenstein

Wanderer From Afar
Premium Member
I wish rather than saying, please don't do that, and politely getting on with it I'd asked where they thought they got the right to put hands wherever they wanted.
It's always hard to do what is right in the moment. I'm trying to do better at that, myself.
 

Orbit

I'm a planet
In some but not all cases....

An older woman who dates much younger men is called a cougar and its accepted.

An older man who dates much younger women is called a cradle robber/pervert and its frowned upon.

I think the opposite is the case, especially in film & TV.
 
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