I have all of the awkward work place stories, but I'll just pick one. Let me introduce you to a character we'll call "Bill."
So a couple months back as I was sorting out the patient's food situations, I was going from room to room. I knocked on this gentleman's doorway and asked if I could come in. He says "Sure, come right on in!" I heard him grunting, but this isn't anything new for me since the patients I deal with are in all kinds of pain. So I pull the curtain back and sitting legs wide open on the commode was Bill just looking up at me bald faced, and he's really trying to pinch off a turd - his face is red from the effort...
I look up and immediately start studying the complexities of the tiles in the ceiling in an attempt to avert my gaze and say, "Oh! I'll come by later." He says "Nah, let's just get this over with..." As he's continuing to struggle against his adversary, his stubborn, unrelenting turd. I just say "It's ok! I'll be back later on." He just says "Well all right, suit yourself!" I wasn't looking, but I assume he was shrugging in that moment, so I made myself scarce and left.
I made sure to wait quite a while before coming back... When I did though, he was laying in bed with his patient gown raised up.... And he was touching his gooch constantly. I just thought to myself, "You know, maybe Bill's right. Let's just get this over with." So I start going through my spiel with him about his dietary restrictions and I try to work with him on getting him something he can enjoy for lunch.
As I'm talking to this guy, he's friendly enough, and he's cognizant and focused on the task at hand, but damn... He just can't stop scratching and idly flopping his gooch around. I don't think he was deriving any kind of sexual enjoyment - I just think he couldn't care less. He has mastered the art of not giving a damn!
Every interaction I had with Bill was like this... Every time I went into his room, it was something new and equally unflattering/terrible.
Now, don't get me wrong... Working where I do, I see a lot of old naked people doing all kinds of things, but Bill... He was probably one of the most shameless and unabashed people I've met yet.